


Duty, Honor, Valor

by lysanatt



Series: The Rules Verse [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Arranged Marriage, Canon elements (S6/7), Comfort Sex, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Everybody is gay and I don't give a quiznak, Falling In Love, Happy Ending, Heartbreak, Hurt/Comfort, Knotting, M/M, Mating, Mating Bites, Mating Rituals, Mpreg, No noncon/abuse between pairings, PTSD, Pining, Post-Canon, Post-War, Pretend Relationship, Slow Burn, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-03
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-05-01 16:49:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 65,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14525001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lysanatt/pseuds/lysanatt
Summary: Shiro hadn't thought that he would be one of the first to enter into an arranged marriage with a Galra general. Yet, when the offer comes, he decides to go against his heart, accepting the bid on him instead of confessing to Keith. Keith, heartbroken, takes destiny in his own hand, determined not to suffer for long. A story about learning to love what you have, about sacrifices, and about finding love in the darkest of places. Also, it is a story about Lance and Kolivan, and about getting exactly what you want, when you want it.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a stand-alone fic. If you want to know what went on with Kolivan and Lance before this part, Parts 1 & 2 give you that story. 
> 
> Also, there will be no violent, abusive Sendak. None.

"Shiro! Shiro?" The banging on the door didn't stop. "Shiro, please!"

Shiro turned in bed, pillow over his head, trying to make sense of the noise while images of battle and sensations of pain thundered through his body. He forced his breathing into a slow, calm pattern. He did not want to panic. The brief but unwanted memory of pain and screams disappeared. It was just Coran. He had to be terribly excited about something since he was causing such a fuss. 

Something that wasn't war. At least there was that.

Shiro breathed out, relieved. 

There was no more war. No gladiator battles. No pain.

He pulled in another deep breath, calming himself. The unbidden flashes of blood and combat had to be dealt with, that was what worked for him. He endured the memories of wounds and attacks as he forced himself to relax, to let them appear and evaporate. Reality was that there was peace. His breathing wasn't quite steady yet. He wondered for a moment if it would ever be. Coran knocked again, the sound pulling him out of look into a dark past he'd rather forget. Luckily Shiro was no longer frozen in terror for very long when the flashbacks hit. Another deep breath and the memories let go of him, leaving him unscathed, if shaken. 

He got up. 

Maybe it had been a mistake to move into the Altean embassy, rather than on the new Galra-Altean settlement on planet Alzaal. Shiro couldn't remember the last time he'd had a day off. He was sure that there had to be a more peaceful place than this. At least the embassy offered him a modicum of privacy. He was a celebrity in Galaxy City these days, seeing that he was the savior of the universe, the unwilling hero of a past war. 

Grabbing a t-shirt, pulling it over his head, Shiro opened the door.

"Where's the fire, Coran? Is the Garrison burning?" Shiro rubbed his eyes, still too tired to feel awake, yet with too much adrenaline rushing through him to feel comfortable. "It better be, what with the shouting. Did anything happen?"

Coran stared at him like he was two. "Of course something happened. Would I wake you up from your slumber if there hadn't been a development? Don't just stand there. Dress. There is a delegation. We must attend to them immediately. Now, chop-chop."

"What else is new? There are delegations all the time." Shiro scratched his chest distractedly, trying to get on with the program. They had ambassadors and rulers coming in from all over the universe to the city that had been build around the Galaxy Garrison and the new Universal Hub: thirteen a dozen and double on a bad day.

Something dawned. Shiro made a frown. "It's not about Lance, is it? Did the Galra file a complaint? I wasn't really Lance's fault. Kolivan was the instigator, no doubt, although—"

"No. We managed to smooth out the, erm, creases. I am, however, surprised that Kolivan behaved like a… like a…"

Shiro patted Coran on the shoulder. Who would have known that Kolivan had it in him? Seeing Kolivan pick Lance up and run off with him, breaking every unwritten rule of traditional Galra courtship sure had been something that Shiro had not expected from the stern Blade-leader. "I know what you mean. Surprised me too. Have they returned? Kolivan and Lance, I mean."

"Yes." Coran pulled his mustache with an exasperated sigh. "Lance looked like he had been mauled by a herd of yuppers and Kolivan _smiled_ at me." Coran's voice took off towards soprano notes. "Smiled, Shiro."

"And? That's why you've woken me at—" Shiro looked at the clock and realized it was 10am. "That's why you woke me up? To tell me that Lance and Kolivan are as of today engaged to be married and that they, as we all noticed yesterday, decided to have a taste in advance?"

"No, no, no!" Coran shook his head. "They _mated_. Did all the preliminary exercises wrong, but they have mated. They are as good as married. Galra courtship—" Coran flailed. "Galra courting does not end with marriage but with... erm, mating. Marriage is an addition; they do understand the concept, evidently. But enough about Lance and Kolivan being scandalous. It is a done deal. Lance—"

"What about Lance?" Shiro interrupted, wanting to hear that Lance was fine with the decision he'd made by accepting Kolivan's offer of marriage. Mating. Whatever. Shiro didn't think there was much to worry about, other than Lance being a flirt who'd never had a steady relationship with anyone in his life, except for Blue. If she counted. He was also sure that if anyone could manage Lance it would be Kolivan. Shiro hadn't known that Kolivan was interested, but as long as Lance finally had someone who didn't give a quiznak about his flirting and insecurities, and didn't take any sass it was all good. "How's Lance doing?"

"He looked very content. What is it you humans say? Like a cat who got in the cream?"

Shiro could not hold back a chuckle. "Wouldn't that be Kolivan? The cat, I mean." It was hard to imagine, but peace became Kolivan. He had eased up, only half as stern as he'd been during the war. It was still a considerable amount of seriousness that Lance had to suffer, though. "At least it turned out to be a good match between the two of them."

"Number Five made attempts to make Lance stop telling everybody how wonderful Kolivan is every two times a dobosh. She did not succeed."

"Pidge failed? Then it must've been good." Shiro turned to look for other clothes than pajama pants and a t-shirt, truly pleased that Lance had taken to Kolivan. Shiro suspected that they would be good for each other. As long as Lance was happy, so was Shiro. He pulled out a pair of clean pants with a triumphant smile. "Just a tick, I gotta see this for myself. Maybe this intermarriage between Galra and other cultures idea isn't half bad." He groaned. "Since I, too, was stupid enough to say yes to an arranged marriage too, it better be.

"I should say so. Prince Lotor's suggestions do have some merit occasionally," Coran huffed, maybe because he just praised something Lotor had come up with. Coran looked very serious. "Which brings us back to my task. The delegation—"

Shiro stopped, mid-move, uniform pants dangling in his good hand.The world had stopped turning. It felt like the ground disappeared from under his feet. 

Oh hell. This time they were here for him. 

Shiro closed his eyes, feeling nauseous. Opened them again. No, the ground was still there. "Is it…"

Coran nodded slowly. "Bless you for leading this attempt at universal alliance. It is no small feat to volunteer to be Lotor and Allura's prime example, seeking peace and reconciliation." Coran sighed as he looked down. He reminded Shiro of a wet cocker spaniel that somebody had been cruel enough to kick. "It is obvious that you, more than anyone, would have the first and the most offers." He paused. "The second offer. I assume Kolivan and Lance running off to make... a connection counts as the first. Turned out that Kolivan had his eyes on Lance for some time, so not much of a sacrifice. Anyway, there isn't a peaceful Galra in the universe who would't want you for a husband, considering their admiration for bravery and battle skills."

Coran was right: the Galra had appreciated his... abilities, not that he felt particularly attractive because or them. Blood and gore didn't do much for his appearance. Shiro decided to steer clear of the topic of his sudden magnetism. "Why are they here? At the embassy, I mean. Shouldn't we all appear before the Council? And what about Kolivan and La—"

"Kolivan and Lance will marry on Sunday. They wish to legalize their mating here on Earth as well. It seems your suitor wants to beat that, or at least make it a double wedding. With Lance stepping up, you are not the only poster boy for peace any longer, my boy. The Galra are seeing this as a competition; the quiznaking fools cannot stop fighting for glory. They want you, and they want an answer. Today."

Bracing himself for the inevitable, Shiro's heart beat so hard it hurt. He took a step back as if it could ward off the immense wave of regret that washed over him. Why the hell had he chosen to make another sacrifice? Nobody had asked him to do it, yet he'd stepped forward like a good soldier. Lotor had barely finished his argument about arranged marriages and alliance before Shiro volunteered. He was still on autopilot when it came to peacekeeping, ready to fight until the last enemy had declared their defeat. He hadn't really thought of the consequences. He hadn't thought at all, and when he did, it was too late.

He had sworn in front of the Council that he would take a Galra spouse. In the spur of the moment, he had wanted to set an example for the entire universe. If _he_ , a victim of Haggar's abuse, could agree to marry peacefully, everybody could. Now he regretted having acted so rashly. Lance and Kolivan had stepped up to the table, falling for each other, happy and eager to marry. A little too happy and eager judging from how yesterday's event went, but they were still role models, a Galra leader and a Paladin.

Now Shiro couldn't take his promise back—there was a suitor at his doorstep. The ramifications of a refusal would be too great. Besides, his offer had made several others give themselves up to an arranged marriage as well. His friends would feel betrayed, the Galra would be furious, and the Council would never trust him again. He did not want to cause a new war in case the Gara took great offence. They probably would.

"Of course I knew they'd ask for me. That was the whole idea," Shiro said. He attempted to look very interested in the lining of his uniform pants. Peace had been so important to him that the consequences of his choice somehow hadn't mattered when he stood in front of the Council. The entire universe's eyes had been upon him that moment. He had supported Lotor and Allura. Well, mostly Allura. She had agreed with Lotor when he suggested the idea: that marriage between a Galra and a paladin would help spread knowledge and intercultural understanding throughout the universe. 

Right. Zarkon had loved Alteans so intensely after he'd married Honerva. Then again, Lotor had embraced his mixed heritage, if not Allura. That would not happen again, Lotor was too devious to her liking, even though the two of them managed to co-rule amiably and, as a result of that, peacefully. They were the heads of the Council. Their words mattered.

Lost again in musings of post-war proceedings, Shiro knew that he had succeeded when it came to setting an example, but he failed himself, failed when it came to honoring his own wants and dreams. He had been so caught up in duty that he had ignored his own heart.

Failure had a name.

 _Keith_. The thought of him hurt like a knife to the heart. He had failed Keith by not speaking to him about his decision, hurting him deeply, Shiro was sure of it. Keith's eyes had burned with anger and tears before Shiro was done making his promise to the Council.

Shiro was way past the point of no return, so entangled in cannots and must-dos that there was no way to go back: he had offered himself to the Garla in front of cameras, his promise broadcast across the known universe. He had sworn to the Council, to Allura. It didn't matter anymore what he could have… what _they_ could have had—

"Shiro, we must go." Coran patted him gently on the shoulder. "Let us show the delegation the respect they rightfully deserve for participating in this glorious attempt to keep the universe peaceful."

"Yeah. Yes, you're right." Shiro stared at his uniform pants, still in his hand. "I'll hurry."

"Ah. Oh." Coran fiddled with his mustache again. "I'll— I'll—I'll wait outside."

Shiro smiled and shook his head. At least Coran stayed the same even if the rest of the universe no longer was what it once were. His smile faded quickly; there was little to smile about. Hurrying to wash up and change, Shiro had time to wallow thoroughly in his misery. Shiro wished he had held his tongue until Kolivan had stepped forward, offering his hand in marriage to Lance. And a few other limbs if Coran's report of bliss and bitemarks was true. At least they seemed happy with their choice, both of them. Lance deserved that—all the Paladins did. Yet happiness might not be in the cards for some of them, he had seen to that.

It was a bitter pill to swallow that his offer had no significant meaning now. Of course it had value, of course it did, but it wasn't _necessary_. Shiro had made his bed and now he had to lie in it—with a husband or wife he did not want. They had been so stupid, Keith and he, like they had all the time in the world to find each other, becoming lovers instead of friends. Shiro wasn't even sure that Keith had wanted it in the first place because he hadn't dared ask. Yet war should have taught them they did not have time at all, and peace… well, peace had shown them that there was no time like the present, and they had both blown it. 

They were fools. Though Shiro could and would not blame Keith for his own reluctance. Now it was all too little, too late, and it was time to think ahead, to what awaited him.

Shiro made a quick mental account of potential suitors. There was Lotor himself, but as far as Shiro knew, Lotor had no designs on his virtue—they liked each other well enough but not like that. Lotor would have asked directly, Shiro was sure. Maybe one of his generals? They weren't all too bad. Shiro wouldn't mind, except he'd prefer a man if he was allowed the choice. Axca would be fine. She was intelligent and they got along. Wrong gender, of course. Surely it would be a marriage of convenience, so that meant nothing.

So if it wasn't one of the more friendly ones?

It left a handful of Zarkon's former commanders who had wormed themselves back into Prince Lotor's favor. Prorok, Sendak, Throk, Trugg… there were enough of them, too many, in Shiro's opinion. Prorok hated Haggar and Zarkon, so that wouldn't be too bad; he probably hated the dead emperor and his witch wife more than he hated the Paladins. After the druids had reassembled what was left of him, he was even passable as Galra. Throk hated everybody, so that would be a slight problem. Sendak detested the Paladins. He had risen in the ranks, eventually forgiven for his attempt at ursurping Lotor's throne. Leading the restructuring of the Galra forces, he had been blessedly absent from the peace negotiations. There was the unlikely option that Thace or Antok had stepped up, or Ulaz. Maybe one of them wanted to take a shot at family life like Kolivan had done… then again, Antok detested marriage, Ulaz was still recovering after the spacetime ordeal, and Thace had his eyes on Keith—it wasn't as if Shiro hadn't noticed, since his own eyes had been turned into that direc—

Shiro cut that thought off immediately. He could not allow himself to think of Keith. He would not be able to do this if he thought of what could have been. Yet his eyes burned with tears at the mere idea of Keith and Thace together. Shiro loved them both dearly but the thought hurt. God, he wished he'd confessed his love before it was too late.

Another mistake he could pile on top of the other wrong turns he had taken in his life.

Shiro threw his pajama pants on the bed, hurrying to pull on his uniform, needing the formality that his rank as commander gave him, a barrier between his core and the person they all thought he was: Black Paladin, Shiro the Hero, a trophy for the Galra who married him.

"Coran?" Shiro called out at the closed door, not sure whether he really wanted to know. "Coran? Who is it? Who called for me?"

There was a reply, muffled, incomprehensible. Shiro gave up. It didn't matter. He'd know in a few minutes. Whoever his suitor was didn't matter; the result would be the same: Keith was lost. Once again Shiro the Hero would be stepping into the arena to engage in battle, his future, his life on the stake. There would be no romance, no happy meetings, no longing. An arranged marriage meant duty-bound. It meant that no one expected or even wanted love. It was about duty. Responsibility. Obligation. 

Like always. 

Why did he never learn?


	2. Chapter 2

There were times when Sendak missed his hand. This time was one of them. He'd have liked to be able to flex his fingers and _feel_ , channeling the sense of frustration and anger into almost invisible movements. Instead he stood straight, eye trained on the huge gates, as unmoving as he was. Their envoy had disappeared inside half a varga ago. This demanded a patience that Sendak did not possess. Not towards these… humans.

 _Duty, honor, valor_ , he thought, reminding himself why he was here. He was a proud warrior, a steadfast defender of the Galra empire. As he had stood by Emperor Zarkon, even when he turned mad by power and obsession with Voltron, so did he stand by Emperor Lotor. After a slight misunderstanding over who was to rule the empire, but that was a thing of the past.

A minuscule movement pulled at the scar on Sendak's cheek as disgust found its outlet. Lotor. An impure Galra who hated his father. That was what they had for an emperor, only Lotor has lost the title. The empire had fallen. Only by the grace of the Council was he still _Prince_ Lotor. Lotor was weak and manipulative, yet Sendak reluctantly found him… able. At least this one attempted to rebuild the empire, not rip it apart like his father had done. The urge to take back the one weapon he had once wielded so powerfully had rendered Zarkon useless, the once so proud emperor falling victim to the rift monsters he had brought upon himself. Prince Lotor made his own weapons. Strong ones. Sendak approved of a ruler who chose tactics before brute force, not that brute force did not have its use. A proper ruler used all the weapons he had at his disposal.

And now duty to his ruler had Sendak standing here like a beggar for scraps, waiting for the Altean bitch to let them in so that he could ask for a human's hand in marriage. Sendak sent Prince Lotor a glare, the only Galra in the large entourage that mattered to Sendak. It had been Lotor's suggestion. _We all need to make amends, Sendak,_ he'd said. _Shiro is strong and handsome. He's a soldier, like you. You'll be great together. It is not much of a sacrifice._

_Shirogane Takashi_. Sendak had learned about the part of Earth where Commander Shirogane's family was born as to show his future husband that he was interested in his ancestors. Names. Polite address. Another twitch of disgust ruined his neutral expression. If Commander Shirogane accepted, Sendak was doomed to a life with a mate he had not asked for and did not want. If Commander Shirogane did not accept, Sendak knew his defeat would be a bottomless pit of humiliation and disgrace. The mere idea that he—a Galra of the purest, finest blood, second in line to the throne, commander of the Galra fleet—should be inadequate, was ridiculous.

This, refusal was unacceptable. 

That his greatest fight would play out in bed and not on the battlefield made him sick. Just like the human he was about to woo. Yet Sendak had sworn deca-phoebs ago to protect the Galra with everything he had, and that was a vow he would never go back on. Nothing beside, nothing above. His body was not his own. Galra, empire, emperor. To the death. For duty, for honor, for valor.

Duty. Honor. Valor.

The gates opened.

 _Duty, honor, valor_ , Sendak silently repeated, thoughts lingering at the virtues he appreciated the most, the mantra he had lived by his entire life. _Duty, honor, valor. Galra, empire, emperor._

One of the traitors stepped out. This one, the large one they called Antok, Kolivan's first in command, looked even angrier than usual. He was a useless bastard, a half-Galra, but he fought well. Like all Blades. Almost as well as true Galra soldiers. Sendak was tempted to call the Blades worthy opponents, but he resisted. He would not sink as low as to recognize a traitor as his equal, despite this one having a rank similar to his own. At least they had sent someone of rank and not the one with the random patches of orange fur on his face. Coran. Or worse: one of the humans.

"Antok." Sendak acknowledged his presence with a barely visible nod.

"Prince Lotor. Commander Sendak." The half-breed was very curt. He did, however, excel at making Sendak's rank sound like an offensive word.

Sendak did not reply. He did not care.

"Princess Allura is ready to receive you." Antok turned on his heel, clearly expecting them to follow him. Sendak shot Prince Lotor an annoyed glare. This was what came from treating the Blades as equals. As _true_ Galra. Sendak loathed that they were forced to wait outside the gates like unruly yuppers, let in only when it suited their master. Mistress, in this case.

Sendak raised a fist to his heart and stepped aside to let Prince Lotor enter. "My Emperor."

"Prince," Lotor corrected, waving Sendak forward. "There is no empire and thus I am no emperor," he argued, face belying his casual treatment of the fact. "Go on. Not my show today." 

Commander Zethrid and Commander Ezor stood behind Prince Lotor, Zethrid with an angry glare, Ezor with a smug grin. Sendak despised them. They were not worthy of Prince Lotor's support. Traitors, all, like the Blades of Marmora. Allegiances meant nothing to these… opportunists.

Sendak bowed his head. "As you command, _Prince_ Lotor." Sendak strode inside, his steps fast and angry, releasing some of his pent-up discontent before he came face to face with Alfor's daughter. It wouldn't do to alienate her entirely; he would need her support to get his way with Commander Shirogane. Shirogane had little reason to accept a proposal from him. Sendak had no illusions about the nature of their future relation, but he would do his best to convince Shirogane Takashi of the wisdom of it. 

He would have to. He needed this human as his mate so that he could help strengthen the empire. That the Galra empire no longer existed was of no consequence. It was still a means to stabilze the power of an emperor who was but a figurehead for the Universal Council. Shirogane would be useful indeed. That he was male didn't bother Sendak. It was rather common among warriors to have male lovers and mates. At least Sendak would not have to deal with a litter of human children, although he would admit that Shirogane's genes might make for very compelling fighters, strong and enduring.

For a small, furless and weak human, Shirogane was handsome. When Lotor had suggested an alliance, he had argued in favor of this one human. Now Sendak couid not refuse Commander Shirogane without offending Prince Lotor. Sendak was not too proud to admit that when he agreed to an arranged marriage, he had wanted no one but Commander Shirogane. There were others who had announced their willingness to take a Galra mate. Sendak was not interested in those. It would be the Champion or no one.

As Sendak walked through the hall, he repeated the options, not because he was in doubt, but to rejoice those he had escaped; an entire slew of unworthy filth from the enemy side. Some were Galra traitors who had volunteered to mate with true Galra for peace, enemy with enemy: Thace, Kolivan, and Antok. There was a female commander from the Earth Garrison, and a mermaid queen. Those of Galra blood mattered not, Sendak would rather die in the arena than touch a blood traitor, and he most certainly would not bestow on one the honor of a mating bond. Sendak was of old and pure blood, sons upon sons of the finest commanders in Emperor Zarkon's fleet. He repeated the list again, cherishing every name, every degrading option: Thace, Kolivan, Antok, Commander what-was-her-name, and the mermaid. There were more of no standing, more without power, and therefore not in the eye of the public. Prince Lotor needed the positive attention. Sendak had agreed to this marriage so that the public would notice his compliance, shifting public opinion for Lotor. It was a sacrifice. _Thace, Kolivan, the commander, Antok, a talking fish._

Commander Shirogane was indeed desirable compared to those. Less of a sacrifice. 

Trying to hide his disgust with the entire idea of mating outside his clan, Sendak would be hard pressed to deny that Commander Shirogane—Shiro—was attractive. Sendak had once accused Shiro of being weak, broken. What a mistake. Now that Sendak had seen Earthlings, it was obvious that they were cowardly, fragile things, but strangely resilient and with an inordinate amount of energy. Shiro was a fine example. Not even a Galra could find cowardice in him. Combat burned in his blood, something deeper than mere aggression got him through one unevenly matched battle after another. It was beautiful. Not the blood and the pain, Sendak was above those who enjoyed slaughter for the sake of slaughter. No proper soldier relished it. Killing a foe was a means to dominate and rule, it was as simple as that. Shiro had a will to survive and conquer that Sendak appreciated. That was what mattered in the arena, on the battlefield. A song of steel and victory sang in Shirogane's veins and made him… _acceptable_ as a mate. Barely.

The echoes of voices and heavy boots reminded Sendak that Prince Lotor and his entourage were with him. He had to keep up appearances. He could show no revulsion, no hesitation. He was here to fight in the name of Galra, and for the Galra empire, whether it held that name or another. _Galra. Empire. Emperor._ Always.

Prince Lotor had restored Sendak's rank and given him the opportunity to restore his honor. Nothing was more important to him than to prove himself worthy. Sendak had failed Emperor Zarkon, but Zarkon had failed all Galra, losing the empire of which he had been the keeper. Now they were stuck with his son. All Sendak could do now was to help Prince Lotor keep his heritage. He would make sure the Galra alliance grew stronger, durable.

Defeat had been bitter and he had no urge to taste that dish again. Everything that Sendak had fought for had fallen apart. Now he was left with the shattered pieces of the Galra nation. Today more than ever, he had to stand for the emperor and fight in the name of Galra.

If taking a mate would help him strengthen the Galra nation, he would mate. Humans had another bonding concept, Sendak had learned. Marriage. Quite like the bond that Zarkon had tied with the witch Haggar when she was still the Altean Honerva. Marriage seemed to embrace the strange notion that this version of a mating bond was created for romance: easy to get and similarly easy to break: one of Sendak's first lessons on human culture, but not the last, he was certain. He had to make it look the part at some point, he knew that, making it look like he was agreeing to an alliance for peace and harmony out of desire. 

Sendak truly hated it. 

Antok, fast on his feet despite his impressive size, stopped outside a heavy set of doors. They slid open, the huge Galra bastard waving them closer. "In there."

There was so much hatred in his voice that it made Sendak pause, wondering whether Antok was leading them into their deaths in some elaborate trap. Sendak did not have any fond memories of his time in the Altean pod. The mere risk of being forced into one once again made him hesitate. Sendak had to remind himself that the Blade bastard and his friends probably would not dare. Universal peace was still at stake. Was that not why they were here? To ensure peace?

After all, they all preferred peace to war. Even Sendak. Ten thousand deca-phoebs of war had been enough. Having lived through many of them, trained by the emperor himself, taught to fight and conquer, Sendak wanted what Emperor Zarkon once wanted for the Galra empire: _stability_. A strong army, a strong empire, a strong emperor. Pillars that supported peace and prosperity for all Galra.

Caught up in thoughts, knew he Sendak had to focus. He could not lose control. He took a deep breath and stepped inside the great hall to meet his destiny in the same manner he had met every foe. 

"Commander Sendak! What a… what a surprise. A pleasant one, if I may say so." The other Altean made a bow, the ridiculous orange face fur vibrating on his upper lip. "And Prince Lotor. May I ask why you honor us with your presence today?"

Prince Lotor nodded encouragingly. "Commander Sendak, if you would state our business."

"My Prince." Sendak bowed to his emperor, grateful that Lotor let him speak for himself.

Sendak stared down at the Altean for a tick. This Coran person had no title or rank that Sendak was aware of, even though he flew the castleship, occasionally commanding the Paladins. Most confusing and irregular. How these Alteans handled anything without a proper line of command was simply baffling. But Coran had the Princess's ear. Sendak greeted him, hand raised to his chest in an attempt to show respect where there was none.

"In the name of Galra and for the renewed friendship between our nations, I have come to ask for your Black Paladin's hand." Sendak bent his head, letting the gasps and outraged outbursts wash over him.

He held back a huff. Humans. Their description of marriage—an exchange of hands—was downright ridiculous, seeing that the involved parties' apparent lack of them. They could swap the prosthetic hands and let it be done with it, hands exchanged, no marriage. 

Sendak sighed. "His hand—and the rest of him. As my mate. In marriage."

Coran's eyes widened in deep surprise. "Oh. I— just—" He turned around to look at the Princess, seemingly bewildered, before he turned to Sendak again. 

"Has anyone else asked for Commander Shirogane's hand yet? If not, I suggest you summon him. I assume he is the one who will either accept or decline my proposal." These Alteans were hopeless. No order, no respect, no discipline. If this had been Sendak's command, operations and chain of command would have looked very differently. Sendak sneered, but managed to hold back the sound that would have accompanied the expression. "Please," he finally said instead, pretending to have at least a modicum of respect for his former enemies. As former as they could be when Sendak would feel a deep sense of accomplishment by killing each and every one of them, with a possible exception of Commander Shirogane. And maybe the spunky little Green paladin. It had heart. A brave little thing that he had enjoyed fighting. It had promise. Not everyone survived aiming a direct attack on Sendak's person. Very few had made it as far and lived, among them the Black Paladin. "I would like to speak with Paladin Commander Shirogane."

"Yes. Yes. Of course." Coran turned again, directing his steps towards the center of the room, towards the dais where the Altean girl stood. "Princess!" Coran's displeasure was dripping from that one word. "Commander Sendak is here to answer Shiro's proposal. Should I—"

Sendak watched as Princess Allura leaned in and spoke with her manservant. The princess's face contracted in disgust. Fine. Sendak felt the same. There would be no illusions, no love lost between them. Any of them. It didn't matter. As long as there was stability.

Coran listened to the princess for a moment before he nodded and strode towards the back of the hall, maybe to go to the Paladins' living quarters.

"Hunk, could you fetch refreshments for our guests, please?" Princess Allura straightened up, a strained smile welcoming them. "Nothing too elaborate. Maybe Prince Lotor and Commander Sendak have urgent errands elsewhere. We cannot keep them here."

Sendak walked closer, folding his arms across his chest. The Alteans were rude and unable to control their emotions. "No, I do not have any errands. There is no _errand_ more urgent than to speak with your Black Paladin. Are we not here to ensure peace between our nations? I wish to aid my prince in his endeavor to strengthen the stability of our alliance."

The smile was even more terse. "Indeed. It is most—commendable." Princess Allura raised her head, almost tall enough to look impressive. "I did not know that you had any feelings for Shiro, Commander. Positive ones, that is."

"I do not." Sendak did not see any need to lie. "Unless you count respect for his abilities as a soldier and admiration for what he has accomplished during the war." He stared down at her. "Alliance has been built on less. I would not be here if I did not think that a connection between your Paladin commander and myself would benefit our alliance first and foremost, and the Black Paladin and myself next. We are former enemies, but we are also soldiers who understand the difference between war and peace." Sendak smiled, not caring to appear less intimidating than he was. "Princess Allura, we all know what these arranged marriages mean. We are setting examples for our respective people. If peace is going to last, we will all have to leave our… opinions and preferences behind. I am not exempt from that. I stood by Emperor Zarkon for the empire, and now I stand by his son and the Alliance. I am the highest ranking officer in the Galra fleet, and my example is going to be followed by many."

"As is Shiro's." Princess Allura nodded. This time her smile was almost polite. "I appreciate your dedication, but I wonder if dedication is enough to ensure a successful alliance between a commander of the Galra fleet and the leader of the Paladins, the commander of the the human space fleet."

"I have no intention of making this any harder than it needs to be," Sendak admitted. He did not like Shiro, but he had no wish to make their marriage a combat zone. They would mate, marry, and move into each their part of a house. Sendak would be away most of the time anyway. Their lives would change little. "I do not ask for Paladin Commander Shirogane to torture him."

"Yeah, right. You tortured Lance and Shiro!"

Hm, the small one. Pidge. The green paladin glared at him with undiluted hatred.

"As I recall it, _I_ did not attack you. You attacked me." Sendak looked at the tiny human. "As for Paladin Shirogane, he is a soldier. He knows what it means to extract intel from an unwilling participant. I am sure you are aware. You were there when you and your friends tortured me."

"No more than you deserved, asshat."

" _Pidge_!" Princess Allura frowned and attempted another false smile. "Prince Lotor and Commander Sendak have done us no ha—"

"Yeah, today they haven't," Green hissed before it strode off, expressing rage by the mere length of its tiny steps. Sendak had to admit that the little green one had courage, almost as much as Shirogane and the Kogane bastard, although Kogane mostly fought to save the Black Paladin when he was not piloting the lion himself. Sendak had seen how he looked at Shirogane. Kogane was pretty and passionate; almost a pity that the small bastard was not up for selection, he was a handsome little thing that would have been fun to break in.

"Lovely," Sendak commented as Green disappeared, meaning the exact opposite. Then again, what was to be expected from these people?

Prince Lotor and the rest of their entourage stepped up to them. Lotor patted Sendak on his flesh shoulder. Sendak sneered at him. The upstart emperor had better not adopt the condescending habits of his mother's people. Prince Lotor might be the Galra leader, but Sendak had little patience left. Even when it came to the upstart prince he had sworn to serve.

"Commander, we are here to ensure peace between our nations. Marriage should be a happy occasion, one to celebrate."

"Then _you_ marry, Your Highness," Sendak hissed, not loud enough for anyone but Prince Lotor to hear. "Maybe the Altean girl will have you."

"Luckily for both me and her, she won't. We sorted that out a long time ago." Prince Lotor looked smug. "I have still to decide what to do about my apparent lack of partner. I, contrary to you, will need to find a mate to give me an heir, so martyrdom is not your best card here, Sendak. We do what we must to protect the Galra from further loss of power, wouldn't you agree? Even if it is not what we planned for ourselves."

Sendak had no wish to play therapist to Lotor and his relationship troubles. There were probably females enough from several species willing to bed and mate Prince Lotor. He was handsome. But his personality… Sendak left that line of thought, trying to get a hold of himself, entertaining only for a second the very pleasant idea of Lotor going back to being exiled. Or killed.

Much depended on things going smoothly, so alienating the Earthlings by airing their dirty Galra laundry in public would not help. Besides, Sendak had no intentions of being on the wrong foot with the princess, especially not when the topic in question was Shirogane Takashi. Even if their marriage would be for show, they needed to be able to look like a couple who at least appreciated one another. The entire spiel about intercultural alliances would not seem very convincing to the masses if they could not. 

Meanwhile, the biggest of the Paladins had returned from the kitchen. Maybe there was something to be said about him as well, other than to criticize him for not honoring his status as Paladin. He was not of the servant class. A Paladin should not have to sink so low as to cook for a visitor. Didn't Earth have people enough so that proper attention to rank and function could be taken? Sendak was satisfied that he had brought his own servants with him to Earth, because this was frankly unacceptable.

Yet there was a slight silver lining. The big Paladin was carrying a tray with delicacies that made Sendak's mouth water. Clearly humans had some useful talents. Maybe he should ask for the big one's hand in marriage instead? Sendak entertained the notion for a few ticks. The big one was good looking, too: sound, tall, and with incredibly muscular arms and legs. Then again, he had nothing on Shiro. The Yellow Paladin—Sendak had forgotten his name—distinctly lacked aggression, which explained why he hadn't made a lasting impression. The big Paladin was appealing, but again, Shiro was… unique.

Sendak had never had a foe bereave him of his victory, neither in full combat, nor in a duel. At the time he had fought the Earthlings, he had been furious. The humiliation he had suffered in the hands of the Paladins still burned deep. However, it had been war, and he was not going to take it out on Shiro when he courted him. It spoke greatly of Shiro's dedication, so above and beyond any other Earthling. It was very… Galra. Sendak was sure the Black Paladin was the only one worth his time and attention. Sendak made a grimace and scoffed. To think it had come to that. 

The big one offered up the tray. Sendak looked at him and at the strange food, attempting a polite nod. "This smells very good," he commented in return. At least he was trying.

Big Paladin smiled broadly. "Thanks. I like to cook. It calms my nerves."

Sendak said nothing. Nerves? Some soldier. But it might explain why the nervous Paladin did these chores.

"You should try that one. It's Steak Tartare. Raw, ground meat with onions and capers—those are the little green ones. Raw egg yolk. And spices. On toast."

The tiny tidbit not only smelled good. It also looked appealing. Sendak took one of the tiny appetizers. "Thank you—"

"Hunk. I'm Hunk. Pidge is the green one, and—"

"I know the others." The bastard and Shirogane he knew all too well. Then there was Lance, the one that Kolivan had taken, druids knew why. A pretty, weak boy. Good with a blaster, though, very good.

Maybe Kolivan was getting old? Unlikely, Sendak decided. Kolivan had been of sound body when they were both recruited to Zarkon's elite corps when they were both young. Younger. It did not matter. Kolivan was of no importance, apart from his status as the leader of the Blades. If Kolivan was impotent, Sendak did not care. He had no interest in Kolivan as a mate, never had. As for whom Kolivan chose to mate with, Sendak could not care less. As long as it was not Commander Shirogane. Shiro… Shiro was _his_.

"Sure. Okay. Erm, right." Hunk looked a little taken aback, as if he had expected some form of idle chatter. 

Sendak took a bite of the Tartare. "This is delicious," he blurted out, deciding on the spot that if there were to be a mating ceremony and dinner, like it appeared the humans preferred, he would ask Hunk to create Earth dishes for it.

"Thanks, man." Hunk did not seem truly shaken by Sendak's blunt dismissal of his attempt at conversation. "Eat up, there's more if you want it."

Sendak regretted it immediately as he held out the small plate. "Yes."


	3. Chapter 3

Keith was standing in the hall, face like a thundercloud. His face was marred by pain. It didn't take much brainpower to know why. It had been Keith's expression since the moment that Shiro had given himself up, allowing Allura and Lotor to arrange his marriage. Half the time, Shiro wished he could go back on his promise to them, yet they all knew that it would reflect badly on them, and Shiro would not do that to Allura. The fragile peace could shatter, broken by the failure of one single Paladin. If only he had had the courage to confess his feelings for Keith years ago, before all this, then maybe they would have had a chance. Shiro would die for Keith, do anything to keep him happy, but ruining a hard-won universal peace would be a price that neither would pay. Shiro knew Keith wouldn't either. So even though the war was over, it had reaped another casualty: love. 

"I want to talk to you." Keith stepped away from the wall.

"I'll inform the Princess that you're on your way," Coran said, backing out, the frown on his face a telling sign that he, like Shiro, knew where this was going. "Please don't be loud."

"Like he—"

Keith shut his mouth as Shiro put his hand on his shoulder, removing it again immediately. Bracing himself for what was to come, Shiro knew he had to cut it short. So did Keith. They both knew what was at stake here.

"It's okay. We talked about this," Shiro said. They did. Keith talked. Shiro lied. About how Keith had been like a brother to him. How Shiro loved him like one. Another lie. There was nothing brotherly about his love.

"You can't, Shiro. Not with… one of those generals." Keith looked hurt, wounded. No wonder.

"I have to. You know what it means, what kind of signal it would send."

"Kolivan and Lance sent that signal already. To the entire Galra population and any other species in existence. They all but fucked each other in public."

"I sent a signal too. It was broadcast throughout the entire universe, to every planet in the Coalition, and surely to some that aren't. I cannot go back." Shiro raised his hand but let it fall again. Keith was not his to touch, not any longer. "Say what you want to say. Just… not something you'll regret later."

"As opposed to doing something that _you'll_ regret later? Why not me, Shiro? I'm Galra. Lance picked Kolivan. They are not enemies. So—"

Shiro had little to say, but he tried anyway. "We are not enemies, no. We are both Paladins. And I swore to Allura… " Shiro raised his hand to touch Keith once again, but stopped, his clenched fist heavy as he pulled back. He had no right. "If I take someone who is truly a former enemy, it will prove that our course is right, that Lotor's and Allura's ideas are right. Enemies can turn to friends, to loved ones." Shiro stopped, pressing his lips together, holding in his pain. "Is that not worth the sacrifice? To let people see that we do not need to hate our former enemies? That forgiveness and redemption are possible? And if I—" He looked down at his prostethic arm. "If I can forgive what they did to me, everybody can forgive them."

Keith turned his head, looking away, at something far away. "No." He turned back, eyes on Shiro, tears brimming. "No. You have paid enough for peace. Let someone else do it."

Shiro regretted already what he had done, yet he knew he had to make the final, devastating blow, but it would be gentler to Keith, to them both, to do it now rather than to let the pain linger. "I can't. I won't. I'm sorry, Keith. You are my best friend, I love you, but I will not marry you."

Keith's pain was the worst pain Shiro had ever experienced. Pale, eyes closed, Keith slid down the wall, burying his head in his hands. The sound of a deep sob was a knife to Shiro's determination. God, he couldn't do this, he couldn't. The lie was too cruel—to both of them.

Shiro's deep breaths sounded suspiciously like sobs too. It took all he had to turn away, directing his steps toward the great hall, leaving behind the life and the love he could have had. Keith's broken sobs were a heavy chain that held him back, making his steps drag. 

He stopped. Oh, damned. He couldn't continue; he did not want to see who was waiting for him. He wanted... 

"Shiro?" Thace stepped out into the corridor. "Allura and Lotor are—" Thace stopped, looking from Shiro to Keith. "Is Keith—"

"Take care of him," Shiro urged, finding the strength to go on. Thace had come at the right moment, the sight of a friend enough to make him pull back from the abyss of devastation he had been about to throw them all into. "Please, take care of him in my stead." Shiro didn't mean now, just for now. Somehow he wanted Thace to be there for Keith today, next week, next year. Thace had feelings for keith. He would be there. For as long as it took for Keith to heal and perhaps, in time, forgive.

Understanding was clear on Thace's face. No explanation was needed. "I will. I swear. I swear, Shiro."

"Thank you." Shiro's words were laden with relief and gratitude. He raised his head, put on a mask of cordial indifference to cover the tears that burned within him, and walked into the hall. To give himself up to whoever had found it appealing to ask for his consent to marry.

The sound of Keith's sobs followed him into the hall. 

*******

The Galra entourage turned as one as Shiro walked in. Lotor nodded, for once not smug or arrogant, like he was actually considering Shiro's feelings. Even Lotor was aware that Shiro was making this sacrifice for him, for Allura, for everyone who fought to keep the hard-won peace.

Shiro walked the length of the room, trying not to let any emotion slip. He counted ten Galra. Lotor, first and foremost. His generals. Antok was there, behind his mask as always, with Regris and Kolivan by his side. Another Galra, one of Lotor's, a bulky older guy with a face like a bulldog stood behind the generals. Next to Bulldog Galra stood Sendak.

No.

Shiro steps faltered as the unbidden memories of his battles with Sendak flashed through his mind. He had been helpless, in pain, far too many times, and all because of Sendak. 

It could not be Sendak. Destiny could not be that cruel.

No, not destiny. But Lotor could. And would.

Shiro forced himself to walk and breathe, to function. He had been in a few meetings where Sendak had been present. He could to this. They were not at war. One step, another. No problem. They were not at war, and they did not have an evil, alien substance from another dimension to mess up everything. On the same bonus side, the Paladins weren't digging into Sendak's mind without his permission, so perhaps everybody were less on the jittery side than they could have been. Shiro held on to the hope that Sendak was only there because Lotor was.

But it was Sendak who stepped forward. He had a sneer on his face, the odd eye alight as he walked towards Shiro, boots making it sound like a particularly big thunderstorm was on its way.

If only. 

"Shirogane." Sendak raised his hand to his chest before he kneeled on the floor, a fluid, elegant movement that belied Sendak's size. "By permission from my prince, I have come to ask for your hand in marriage."

Shiro suppressed an anguished cry. Sendak... no! But before Shiro could refuse and ruin everything they had worked for, Paladins and Alteans alike, Sendak spoke again, silencing Shiro's voice.

"I am aware that we have been enemies for a long time and that it is not easily forgiven, nor forgotten. All I ask for is that you hear me out before you decline my proposal. I am certain you might be inclined to refuse. Do me the courtesy and speak with me first. In private."

Shiro just stood there, almost paralyzed, as the Galra generals stared at each other, like Sendak's actions had come as a surprise.

Allura walked closer. "Shiro, are you—"

"Yes. I'm fine, Allura. I'm good." The shock was still holding on to him, little claws of helplessness and desperation digging in, ripping him apart. Panic. _Breathe_. 

Sendak was kneeling, still unmovable. Even the eye was expressionless. Only his ribcage moved, deeper breaths, like he, too, had trouble controlling himself. Anger, probably.

A drop of sweat trickled down Shiro's temple. He felt cold. He counted to ten. Then twenty. Sendak was still passive, in the same way a hunting tiger was passive, waiting for prey. Of all the generals, all the cruel, sadistic Galra, Sendak was the— 

No, Sendak wasn't the worst. Shiro had seen the worst in the arena, in the box above it, Zarkon watching the slaughter. He had seen it when he stared at the druids, experienced their glee when they inflicted pain on him. It could be worse. But not by much. But being bound to the creature that he had nightmares about, even in daytime? Living the nightmare?

There was a price to be paid for peace. It was named _sacrifice_."Yes, I will speak with you," Shiro agreed.

"In here." Coran was there immediately, showing with a hand in the direction of one of the adjacent suites. He put a hand on Shiro's good arm, squeezing it for comfort. "I'll get you some of Hunk's refreshments, maybe some Nunvill—"

"No, thank you," both Shiro and Sendak said at the same time. 

"Just Hunk's Steak Tartare," demanded Sendak, rising from the floor as easily as he had kneeled. He kept his distance. That was something at least.

"And some tea." Shiro could do with the comfort of something warm. He refrained from asking for a knife. He didn't think it would be appreciated if he stabbed Sendak in the face, not that he was missing the incentive to do so. Shiro exchanged a look with Coran. He would be okay. At least he could say that he'd experienced something new—having a polite conversation with Sendak certainly was something he had never tried before, nor attempted. Shiro decided to appreciate the experience, more or less to distract himself from the presence of the giant Galra and his giant druid hand.

"I'll be back," Coran promised, glaring for a few seconds at Sendak. 

"Contrary to your belief, Shirogane will be safe with me," Sendak growled, clearly offended. "I have honor."

That was surprising. Honor? It made an annoyingly sensible sense, seeing how the Galra fought and treated each other. Apart from Lotor, that was. He would rather manipulate than fight, not that he couldn't fight if he had to, and with the best. Then again, Lotor was half Altean, brought up by the universe's biggest tyrant, so it was okay that the shoe didn't fit. Shiro decided that perhaps Lotor was an outlier. He still had that 'victory or death' vibe, though.

The question was: what was Sendak? What had peace done to him?

It took a lot from Shiro to look up at Sendak, expressing nothing. He didn't look away as the door to the room slid shut at Coran's departure. They were alone. 

"I did not lie, Shirogane. You are safe with me. I never lie." Sendak turned around, staring at Shiro. His druid arm hung passively at his side. "Lying is dishonorable."

"Erm, good to know," Shiro said, realizing that Sendak was being very firm about it. "But to be honest, it doesn't do much to erase our… back story." He rubbed his neck, feeling more frustration than fear. "Why me? Why you, for that matter? Did Lotor force you?" 

Sendak's laughter was deep and strangely warm. "No, Prince Lotor did not force me. I am not easily forced. My prince asked for my compliance and I agreed to enter into an alliance with my former enemy. I swore by my honor to serve Prince Lotor, and I neither would, nor could, decline. I am indebted to him, bound by honor and oath. Prince Lotor graciously allowed me to choose my own mate. Although he suggsted you, I had the final say. I chose you."

"But that does not make sense," Shiro blurted out, perhaps a little confused by having a relatively normal conversation with a Galra who had tried to kill him repeatedly. 

"Is that so? Your bravery in combat and your fidelity to Princess Allura are commendable traits; as are your strength and perseverance in the arena. I can think of no one more worthy than you, Shirogane. Lotor chose me to enter into an alliance for the Galra empire. As I said, Prince Lotor graciously allowed me a choice—and I chose you."

"We hate each other." Sendak appeared to be frank about his reasons, so Shiro could do the same. "How is that gonna work for us, you think?"

"Not very well in the long run. I assume we could work on that. I did not plan to take up cohabitation with you, other than to uphold a facade of respectability. I do not need to like you, Shirogane, nor are you required to like me. But we are both required to assist our leaders in securing stability for the people and planets we defend. If our prince and princess can live in relative peace, it is not too big an assumption to believe that so can we. For the good of the alliance between our species."

Shiro wasn't sure what to believe. This Sendak was… tolerable. But had he changed? Were he to be trusted? Shiro almost laughed aloud at that idea. Of course he wasn't trustworthy.

It all came down to the question: who would he rather have? Sendak or somebody else? Maybe that other Galra he hadn't seen before. Or he could call it off, go back and beg Keith for forgiveness, then try and see if they could—

Stopping that painful line of thought before he broke apart entirely, Shiro knew it wasn't an option. It would weaken Allura, and clearly, seeing that Sendak was here, it would weaken Lotor too, what with the Galra's attention to honor and duty. At best it would cause a rift between their nations, at worst, it'd start the war all over again.

The door whispered open behind them. Shiro glanced briefly at Coran, nodded his okay for him to enter, then turned his attention to Sendak. Coran disappeared as quietly and quickly as he'd come, leaving a tray on the table. Sendak looked at the plate, grabbed an hors d'oeuvre with obvious glee, eating it with a little too much teeth for it to be comfortable. If anything about Sendak could be comfortable. 

Shiro didn't say anything, but took a mug and poured tea in it. He turned the mug in his hand, one of Pidge's, with some cartoon character on it that he didn't recognize. He took a sip of the too-hot tea. "Why me," he said, wanting more from Sendak than the most elementary. They both knew why they were here, what their tasks were, but there had to be more to it. "Why did you agree to it? Other than for honor and some debt you owe Lotor and because I fought in the arena."

"Why would I give less to the empire than a Paladin would give for _their_ leader? Your sacrifice is grand, Shirogane. You offer yourself in exchange for the unity of the people. My sacrifice will be similarly large." Sendak put his fist on his heart. "No one shall say that Sendak, son of Tirdak, has given less than the Paladins. I have always fought in the name of Galra and I will never stop doing so."

"So this is a fight? Between you and me?" Shiro put the mug down. "What had you planned? That we should marry and I'd be a convenient body for you to take at your leisure? Rape?"

"No!" Sendak almost roared, making Shiro flinch. He lowered his voice. "I would never defile my honor by committing such a vile act against my mate, against anyone. You do not understand the Galra, Shirogane, and maybe this is a mistake. Are you educated in the way of Galra mating? Do you not understand how intimate a mating is, how… sacred?" Sendak sneered at him again, clearly angry.

Shiro took a step back and almost fell over, refusing to cower in front of Sendak. His encounters with Sendak were still raw and bloody in his mind, and right there, all the fear and the near-death experiences of those moments returned. Shiro barely kept himself together. 

Sendak frowned. He took a step back. "You are afraid of me."

"It would be suicide not to be."

"I told you. The circumstances are different now. I yielded, earning my life in return for my allegiance to Emperor Lotor. I am his vassal, his sword. I swore on my honor. You will be my mate—"

"Don't be too sure." Shiro had recovered enough to think again.

"Very well. _If_ you are to be my mate, I am bound to you by honor and duty. I could not harm you, not that I intend to do so. The bond between mates is strong, different from your marriage here on Earth. Your human unions are feeble and weak constructions."

"Convincing, seeing how many times you have tried to harm me." Shiro hovered in the strange borderland between anger and a full on anxiety attack.

"It was war. We were enemies. I do not wish, however, to pretend that I have developed warm feelings for you; I care about no one but the Galra Empire, but war is over. Killing times are over." 

"You _tortured_ me for—" _fun_ , Shiro was about to say, but realized that, yes, Sendak had been cruel, but for a purpose. It had not been Sendak who had sent him to fight in the arena. "You tortured me. And Lance." 

"Cowards would apologize. I will not. I would lie. I am not sorry. Torture was never for my amusement. You stood in my way, in the way of the task I had been commanded to accomplish. Like you, I did what was necessary. I am a warrior, and we were at war."

Shiro nodded. It was a hard truth, but he understood. It didn't make it better, but he understood. "And you still think I'm a broken soldier?" He remembered every word Sendak had said that day. He remembered how scared he had been of him, and how relieved when he'd pushed the button that sent Sendak out into the dark void. "That's what you told me."

Sendak pursed his lips as he studied Shiro. "Yes. We are both broken. Doing what we have done does not come without cost. I shall be honest with you. I do not wish to lie; I find that I prefer the truth most of the time anyway. It tends to intimidate people."

"And you—"

"—and I believe peace broke us a second time. We were not meant to sit peacefully at home. We are soldiers. The war stopped, but we cannot stop being warriors."

"Somehow I'd prefer being at home to fighting daily battles, or to being tortured by you, or thrown into the arena by your friends so they can watch me kill innocent victims." Shiro crossed his arms as he glared at Sendak. "Marrying you would be a continuation down that slope of misery."

"Marrying me would give you a partner who would understand your nightmares. One who would know not to ask about your scars. I told you this before as well: we are alike, you and I, and it has nothing to do with something as superficial as our missing limbs or that the replacements were made by the druids."

"Yeah, you did tell me. When you tried to manipulate me into giving in to you and join Zarkon. It really makes for a compelling argument."

"I did. When you and your friends tortured me. Yet you resisted. And now here we are, both of us under the rule of those we once despised. I still despise that Altean princess of yours."

Against his will, Shiro laughed. How could he not? "And you are under the rule of others because Lotor is the only being in the universe more manipulative than you. After he forgave you, you could have usur—"

"No!" The look of fury on Sendak's face appeared and disappeared in an instant, like he tried to hide it. "I was misguided by the witch Haggar. Emperor Lotor is my ruler, if no longer by name. I no longer seek the throne, although I would not refuse it. I am a commander of the Galra fleet. It is what I do. I would kill my enemy in a heartbeat but I would offer my emperor my last breath. Prince Lotor is not Emperor Zarkon. Yet I swore to stand by him, and I have never broken an oath. I fight in the name of Galra, then and now. Prince Lotor forgave me, reinstated me, and I will never betray him." 

Baffled, maybe because the repeated outbursts regarding honor made it plausible that Sendak was telling the truth, Shiro realized that he'd have never thought that Sendak was able to have such deep-rooted affinity for fidelity and honesty. He never thought he'd be able to feel so strongly for anything other than killing and conquering. Strange. "I see." He did. "And it is your sense of duty to Lotor that had you coming here, asking for— me."

"And it is it not your sense of duty to your princess that made you give up yourself to any Galra who would have you?" Sendak's voice was cold. "I am here because I am honor-bound to my emperor. I want to stand by him, doing my utmost to aid him in his endeavor for stability and peace. It is not merely duty. My goal is no different, nor less heartfelt than yours. Again we are very alike, Shirogane, even though you refuse to admit it."

"I am not like you." Shiro's arm itched and he had to force himself not to scratch. "You enjoy war. You enjoyed hurting—" Shiro felt as if he was on repeat. 

"No, Shirogane. I did not enjoy it. I did what you did: fought, killed, used any means necessary to win the battle. And I rejoiced when I won. Look me in the eye and tell me that it is different from what any Paladin has done while the war lasted."

Shiro said nothing. There was nothing to say. Sendak was right. They had all done horrible things. Shiro had done horrible things. The arena. Thousands of Galra soldiers killed or burned to death in the ships they'd shot down. He had blood on his hands and it could never come off. He was marked, tainted, and there was nothing he could do other than what he had done already: give himself up so that his life was no longer his own, but merely a token that could be bargained for more peace, a stable peace. If he deserved anything for what he had done, it was this.

"And now you are thinking about how a monster like me or a monster like you could ever dare want for anything more than redemption." Sendak's eyes were suddenly sad. "What did you expect, Shirogane... Shiro, giving yourself up like that? You knew that every officer in the Galra army would kill to have the Champion at their disposal. Be glad someone like Raht or Ladnok did not beat me to it. They pledged their loyalty to Lotor, but not to you. Or Markot. Markot was insistent enough to come, just in case you refused my offer, he was very explicit about what he wanted. That would not be a happy outcome for you."

"I am not sure how _you_ ended up into the happy outcome category," Shiro snapped, ignoring the odd intimacy of his shortened name being said out loud by someone like Sendak. He was getting angry, and he was getting angry because Sendak was right. Maybe it had been the need for punishment, for atonement, that had made Shiro insist on alliance. Maybe that was why he had refused Keith? He expected nothing good to come from this, and he'd made damned sure nothing would. "How would marrying you make it any better? How would it make _anything_ better? And that Markot guy? Not going to happen!" Shiro was not going there. "I'd rather have—" 

His head whipped up, eyes wide as he stared at Sendak. 

"Now we are getting somewhere." Sendak smiled. It was disconcerting. "I understand your reservations, I certainly have a few when it comes to marrying the man who tried to pry my mind open by force. But that aside, let us speak of the benefits and conditions; we are entering into an alliance, so negotiation is to be expected." Sendak raised his head, pausing for a second as if he was making an account. "First and foremost I would agree to stay here, on Earth, if you prefer. I would not drag you back onto my ship, nor will I ask you to move to Alzaal. Secondly, neither of us have any illusions as to what we are doing. Our marriage… our mating… would be without any physical contact, except for the one time needed for the mating to take place. Prince Lotor has generously offered me a house in the Galra community here. It will be large enough to make it tolerable to share a household with you. Share. Nothing more."

"So—" Shiro blinked, opened his mouth, then closed it again. He frowned. Sendak was offering him… freedom? 

"So I am not used to compromise, but Prince Lotor graciously assisted me in finding it. I wish to assist him in creating a distraction from the difficulties of the peace negotiations, something the general population might understand better. A love story. You and I… our marriage would be high-profile: the two leading generals, deadly enemies who worked together for peace, turning enmity into friendship, and then into love. Everybody would say that if we could overcome the wounds of war, then everybody can. Your Lance and Kolivan could never attract such interest. Us, on the other hand? The narrative would be epic. The Champion and Emperor Zarkon's lost commander, the redeemed usurper. A love spanning galaxies. It would require impressive acting skills, but I am sure we can manage. Kolivan and Lance might be human and Galra as well, but their relationship is not very inspiring. We surely can do better."

"Unless you call love and care inspiring."

"I do not care about love, and neither do you; otherwise you would not have agreed to an arranged marriage." The words cut like a blade. "You would have been in bed with the half-breed, not giving a quiznak about me or any other Galra but him. I have but one eye, Shiro, but I can see."

"What?" Shiro gasped, trying to hide the pain. Had he been so transparent? Was it painted on his forehead that he loved Keith?

"Let us call it what it is. Your need for redemption is larger than your need for love. I offer you redemption. I am selfish; I too seek redemption, albeit not for the same reasons. I regret little, but I want stability for my people. I believed in Zarkon when he promised us that. I could have joined the Blade of Marmora when Zarkon went mad with Quintessence; I considered it for more than a tick. I trusted the witch Haggar, foolishly, yes, but I trusted her, and I would not have regretted it, had I taken the throne from Lotor. I was honor-bound to Zarkon at the time." Sendak sighed deeply before he continued, like he had been recalling the events.

"I am now honor-bound to his son in exchange for his leniency. There has been enough war. This is my sacrifice to make sure the Galra people get that. I might state—often and loudly—that I do not care about others, and I do not. I care about the Galra, about the wellbeing of the people. My crime was that I was loyal to a fault, praising myself to be flawlessly honorable, even when Zarkon cared not. I should have supported Emperor Lotor when I had the chance, before his father exiled him. Before I fought him at the Kral Zera." Sendak took a deep breath. "Apart from that, I would have done nothing differently. I would still have killed, still been ruthless enough to take what I wanted, make no mistake. Tell me you are any different, Shiro. You are not. You willingly sacrificed your friend. I saw his feelings for you die as you entered the hall and he left. You cannot go back. He is hurt, and the love he had for you is dying." 

Despite having his unresolved feelings for Keith dangled in front of him, shock still making him close to speechless, somehow it all made some ironic kind of sense. Shiro pressed his nails on his good hand into the palm, letting the pain ground him. He waited another second until he was sure he could speak without breaking down. Sendak's cruelty had a cooling effect as well. "Yes, I have feelings for Keith," he admitted, the confession bitter on his tongue. "But I swore to Allura I would do anything to help her. I promised her. I want peace. War means just another fight, another battle where Keith or Hunk or Allura or any of those I love are at risk. I will do _anything_ for peace. I will do anything so that I won't have to cradle Keith's dead body in my arms, or see him go up in flames in a fight. I don't expect you to understand, but that is how it is." Shiro felt the tears burn behind his eyes. "I love him. I'll do anything, Sendak."

The expression on Sendak's face was unfamiliar. Compassion. He raised his hand, slowly. Shiro tried not to shy away. It was warm and soft, the brush of velvet fur, silken on Shiro's cheek. "Then marry me. Together we'll make sure that your loved ones and my people will not suffer again. Let us help our prince and princess. Be my mate, not my enemy."

Shiro could feel the pull of temptation. There were so many Galra officers, people with power, one more horrible than the next. At least he knew what he got with Sendak. What if he refused him and the next one was worse, much worse? "And me," Shiro said, almost inaudibly. "What about me?"

Sendak nodded, serious, as he looked Shiro in the eye. He raised his hand to his own chest. "I pledge my loyalty to you, Shirogane Takashi. I swear on my honor that I shall never hurt you, nor lie to you. I will do my best to be a good mate to you. You will lack for nothing."

Shiro had seen up close how trustworthy Sendak was, brutal, cold, manipulative asshole that he was. Only Shiro was going to be on the other end of that unpleasant behavior, the one where Sendak's considerable strength used _for_ Shiro and not against him. The side where a sworn oath actually meant something. Shiro didn't doubt Sendak's words. He had seen with his own eyes the dedication that Sendak had for his emperor and the Galra. It had to be enough. It had to.

"Yes," Shiro said, knowing that he was making his worst nightmare real. He sealed his own fate with a nod before he regretted it. "Yes, I'll marry you."


	4. Chapter 4

Offering comfort did not fall natural to Thace. The backside of being brought up Galra. It had its benefits, but right now, Thace had difficulties remembering any of them. Keith was falling apart before his eyes, and Thace was at a loss. Like the most Blades, Keith was aloof when he wasn't angry. Emotions came at a cost, and Keith had learned from the best to avoid those expenses, Thace was sure. Keith rarely showed his feelings, yet now they came tumbling out. Tears, sobs, a heart broken.

Two hearts. Thace's fell apart, torn into pieces as Keith cried for Shiro.

Three. Because Thace was certain that Shiro had not begged him to take care of Keith only because of his friendly feelings for Keith. Shiro had sacrificed love for peace, like the Blades had done for Millenia.

Thace hesitated. He wanted to reach out, his hand shaking with withheld touches, with hidden caresses. He knew how Keith felt, the devastation echoed in Thace's own heart. He wasn't sure when he had fallen in love with Keith—unequivocally, deeply in love. Touching him now when he was hurt and grieving his love for another man? Thace was outside his comfort zone. Keith gave another deep sob, muted by a shaking, thin hand across his mouth. 

"Keith?" Thace kept his voice low and soft, like he was talking to a wounded, frightened animal. 

The only reply was yet another sob.

"May I— may I touch you?" Thace attempted, kneeling down on the floor. 

Thace had never seen Keith like that. Angry, closed, brooding, occasionally happy, but never _broken_. Keith was falling apart before his eyes, a deadly blow to his heart. For a moment Thace questioned his own judgement. Why had he promised Shiro to take care of Keith? It wasn't just for now. Thace knew what Shiro had asked of him. Keith was his responsibility now. Until Keith could stand on his own, no matter if it took deca-phoebs or an entire lifetime. 

Because Shiro couldn't be there, even if he and Keith were tied by the heartstrings. 

Thace could have questioned Shiro's decision. He didn't. He knew what it was about. Anyone staying back to save a straggling comrade would not be able to win a fight. They were no longer fighting a war, they were trying to win a peace. That battle had just lost Keith and Shiro their happiness. Shiro could not afford to look back for a wounded comrade.

Thace moved closer, careful not to touch Keith. "Keith. Keith, look at me." The floor was hard and cold beneath his knees, but Thace barely registered it. He only saw Keith. It was like Thace's hope of ever holding Keith in his arms at the right time, at the right moment, bled away with each tear falling from Keith's eyes.

"I can't," was half sobbed, half whispered into the faded red of Keith's sleeve, voice rough with sorrow. "I just— I…" There were more sobs, little raw sounds of pain, muffled by fabric and willpower. 

"Let me take care of you," Thace offered. "Not because I was asked to, but because I want to. Let me be your strength."

A gasp of pain, then a blur of black and red before arms were around Thace's neck, a wet face pressed against his chest, sobs closer and louder. Thace's heart shattered again, like he suspected it would do over and over for the next couple of phoebs, only to grow back together so Keith could break again. Slowly Thace raised his arms, gently pulling Keith into his embrace, praying to any deity that cared to listen that he could do something, anything, even the smallest, tiniest part, to help ease Keith's pain. Thace stroked Keith's back, light, calm strokes, over and over, until the sobs subsided and Keith's breathing calmed down. An occasional sob left him until he was done, face still turned away, pressed against Thace's neck.

They sat like that for some time, the only sound that of the vague, indistinguishable murmur from the hall.

Suddenly there was shouts and cheers, congratulatory wishes, laughter. Like there was anything to celebrate other than a fortified peace treaty. It was a wake for Keith's love.

"It's done," Keith whispered, voice devoid of emotion. "He's gone."

Thace saw no reason to deny the obvious. "Yes. I'm sorry, Keith. I wish it would have turned out—" Thace stopped himself. He didn't want to lie to Keith, not now, not ever. Only the truth. He deserved nothing less. "Would you like to move?" Thace asked, ready to carry Keith on his hands to wherever he would like to go. "Would you like to go to your room? Just tell me what to do."

There was a sniffle. "No. I want to go to _your_ room."

"Mine?" Thace frowned, looking searchingly at Keith.

"Now." Keith pulled back and Thace let him go, waiting for him to decide what he wanted to do, or more precisely, how. 

Keith stood. His face was a mess of tears and snot, but the eyes... the determination was obvious. "Yes. Yours. Now."

Thace nodded. "Right. Let's go." He didn't wait—he was not in the habit of doing so—but counted on Keith to follow him. Light steps made a soft echo that accompanied the sharp click-clack of Thace's boots as they walked towards their living quarters, taking a detour through some of the lesser used hallways as to avoid the grand hall.

Putting his hand on the scanner, the door to Thace's room slid open. His room was neat and almost empty: a couple of Earth books, a tablet and a brush were lying on the desk, the bed neatly made. Thace stepped aside, letting Keith in. He followed him, sliding open a drawer, pulling out a towel. "If you want to use the bathroom."

Keith looked at him. "I am not ashamed. I cried. I had reason to."

"Yes. But you also have snot on your face." Thace held out the towel again. He wanted to comfort Keith, not baby him. "If you want to keep it, that's your decision."

Keith scoffed. "Nobody's going to look at me so why would I care?" Anger was bubbling right beneath the surface, searching for an outlet, waiting to explode. In Thace's face, probably. He braced himself for impact. It didn't come. Instead Keith's anger deflated and fled.

Keith reached for the towel. He looked up at Thace as if he was about to say something. He shook his head, turned and disappeared into the bathroom, slamming the door behind with his foot. 

At last Thace could let out the tension. He sighed deeply, forcing his breath into a calm, deep, steady rhythm. He closed his eyes, focussing on his inner strength. He let the feelings he had for Keith flare wildly for a few ticks, then calmed them, turning them into energy for his strength to feed on. He would need it, every bit of strength he could muster to keep himself under control, never for a moment revealing his feelings for Keith.

Listening to the sounds from the bathroom, Thace sat down on the bedside, feeling empty and sad, like all his emotions were flushed, too, gone. The flush of the toilet. Running water. A nose being blown. The scent of soap, mild and flowery, albeit alien. 

Thace took the time to calm himself. It wasn't easy. He had been in love with Keith for years, from the first time he laid eyes on him. It was the fire, the energy, the way he was both Galra, and not. The obvious intelligence. The rare smile. The way he fought, with everything he had. Keith was passion, fire, a furnace that burned hotter than anything Thace had ever encountered. 

He desired Keith. He fell in love and it had not taken long to come to love him deeply. He would do anything to win Keith's love. Thace was not happy at all to see Shiro refuse Keith's love; he was devastated, knowing that Shiro could have had this—and declined. Keith suffered deep heartbreak when he could have had love.

Thace sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He both minded and didn't mind being at Keith's beck and call. He had no illusions as to what Keith thought of him. He wasn't Shiro, and that was what—or rather _who_ —mattered to Keith. 

The water ran again, then stopped. The door to the bathroom hissed and slid open. Keith stepped out, still red-faced and teary eyed, but with a determined look that told Thace that Keith had taken a decision. This was Keith in battle-mode, and there was no shelter from the storm. 

Thace braced himself for what was about to come. He had sworn to Shiro that Keith could have whatever he wanted. Thace had no doubt that he would pay dearly for that promise—and that he would do so at the expense of his own feelings. Holding Keith in his arms to comfort him for a while, hoping for the impossible... that would be all that Thace got. It would be his reward to see Keith leave the hurt and the sorrow behind, even if it meant that Keith would move on with Lance or Hunk or even Prince Lotor, if that was what he decided when he was done mourning the love of his life. 

Keith walked to the bed, looking at Thace as if he was asking permission. Thace made an almost imperceivable nod. Keith made a similar nod and sat down. "I'm... I didn't think he'd go this far," he said, his voice devoid of… anything. Dead.

Thace hadn't thought that Shiro would, either. "We never think we are able to do the things we do. I never wanted to sacrifice everything for the Blade, and yet we both gave over our entire existence to them so that the Coalition could make headway towards victory and peace."

"Doesn't peace mean that we could stop making them? Sacrifices?" Keith asked quietly. He pressed his lips together, silent, waiting.

"Peace needs to be won, too. Shiro—" Thace waited as the flicker of pain left Keith's face. "Shiro made another sacrifice. You know I gave myself up to alliance as well, even though no one has yet come forward to ask for me. If marrying another person who also seeks peaceful cohabitation between species is what must be done, that is a sacrifice I am willing to make."

It had been an easy decision when Kolivan had asked him to do so. He could not have the man he loved, so he would love the one he got. 

"Anyone from human to Galra to… whatever could make an offer for you." Keith made it sound like an accusation. It probably was. "Is there no end to the sacrifices we make?"

"I am well aware. I have used most of my adult life to fight for peace, and now that we have it, I will see to it that it lasts. Within my limited cabilities, of course."

Keith sneered. "But you love no one. It's not as hard for you. You won't have your heart ripped out, seeing someone you love choose the greater good before you."

Thace tried to keep a straight face. "You were willing once, to die for victory, to protect the ones you loved. How can you think that I would feel differently?"

Keith's face fell. "I— I don't know." He looked away, as if he hadn't thought of it that way. He looked up again through lowered lids. "I know it's selfish, but for once, I wanted— I wanted something for _me_."

Thace would have liked to get what he desired too. He didn't want to burden Keith with a pain that was not his, yet Thace had to let go of it: it was slippery and elusive, eager to get out in the open. 

"I do love someone," he said quietly, "I have done so for a long time, but nothing will ever come of it."

Keith's eyes widened. "Oh, I didn't know. I'm sor—"

"Don't be. And no, nobody knows. Not until now." Thace wanted to close down that part of the conversation again; he had said enough. "If the druids had known, they would have used it against me, had they captured me after our escape. Emotions were—are—a luxury we cannot afford, you know that."

"I'm sorry." Keith turned like he wanted to ask something, then stopped as if he'd thought the better of it. "You are going to marry someone and… I don't understand. You promised Shiro to take care of me. You can't do that with a wife on your hands. Besides, I don't need taking care of," he snapped, contradicting himself.

The anger was back. Thace found it better than the sadness. Keith had the right to be angry, just as Shiro had the right to make the decision he had made, sad as it was. 

"I know you don't. I fought beside you. You are strong."

"Mm-hm." The wordless sound was approving. 

Keith was not a child. He was a Blade, a rebel, a freedom fighter who could and would hold his own. He did not need to be babysat. Thace didn't want to do that either. He merely wanted to offer Keith his support. "Shiro asked me to take care of you, yes. And I do not want to go back on my word. I—" Thace held up a hand as to stop Keith from speaking, he could see the words there, ready to tumble out in one angry heap. "I will keep the vow I made, although I will let it be up to you on how to interpret that promise." 

Thace's heart made a particularly painful throb. _Ancients_ , he both hoped for, and simultaniously hated the idea of Keith rejecting him. He would be spared much pain if he was rejected. He foresaw phoebs, deca-phoebs of loss and pain if Keith insisted on his help and support. Thace didn't think that Keith would be one to leave his heartbreak behind like a torn cape, skipping happily to enjoy the peace and freedom of the new united universe. It would be torture to help him through it all, keeping his own destroyed heart a secret all along. "I swore to you that I would be by your side, and I will. I will do anything for you."

Keith just sat there. Hands between his knees, head hanging, the mop of black hair hiding his features, he was just... existing. Thace waited. 

"Just like that?" Keith asked, face still hidden. "Just like that?"

"Yes." There was little else to say. The offer was unconditional. 

"Anything? Even your life? Not that you should die for me. I—" Keith looked away, a slight blush on his cheeks.

"Yes." Thace stared at the wall opposite the bed. It was white and empty. "I was willing to give my life for you once. I'll do it a second time if that is your wish." Thace held out his hand as if a handshake would make it a stronger promise. "I'm yours. I am not sure what you want with me, or why you would want such a sacrifice. But I'm yours."

Keith nodded, expression grim. "I'm not good at… explaining. I know I'm gonna use you." Keith opened his mouth as if to speak again, yet no sound left it. He sighed and turned away, shoulders falling. "I never wanted you to be a rebound."

Thace had no idea what a rebound was, but he made a qualified guess. A toy, someone who meant nothing but distraction from the pain until he was no longer needed. "You will use me, I am aware. I give you my permission to take from me what you need." Thace's heart was heavy with sadness. He did not know if there was any hope to be found in their union, any love, other than the one he held for Keith already. "If only you will promise me to do your best to heal. Heart and mind."

Keith didn't turn right away. "I promise," he said, voice low. "I owe you my life, and I promise." He raised his head, black hair falling over his shoulders, before he looked at Thace again. Words came, but it was painful to get them out, Thace could tell by the way they dragged, little ragged sounds, unformed and unused. "You are my friend, Thace. I like you. A lot. If I can't have— If I can't have—" His voice broke, eyes glassy with tears once again. "If I can't have Shiro, I'd rather have you out of anyone." He wiped a tear off with the back of his hand. "Please, Thace, please?" Keith's voice was but a whisper. "I know it's unfair to you, but help me forget. I don't want this pain any longer. I want— I want—" Keith's fingers clutched at Thace's jacket, almost violent. 

It was pain, deep pain, a torture that not even Haggar could have devised. Suddenly Thace had everything he wanted, except love, and it hurt worse than anything he had ever experienced. He couldn't show it, couldn't let Keith know. All he could do was to save him from the pain Shiro had caused them both. Thace wanted to help Keith save himself. That he could do. "Anything," Thace said again and meant it. "Anything."

"Then fuck me. Until I forget." Keith stepped back, pulling at his own clothes, buttons suffering under his impatient hands. "Do it!"


	5. Chapter 5

"Thace, I need you." Keith's voice was sharp and tense with sorrow. "I'm not too proud to beg. Please."

There were so many questions and Thace could ask none of them. He was determined to respect Keith's wishes, no matter what they were. The price he had to pay mattered little. _Have you done this before? Are you sure you won't regret it later? You are aware that nothing I do can erase your loss or your love for Shiro?_ Thace wanted to say, but he kept his mouth closed, watching Keith undress, entirely without any modesty or care. 

Keith's movements were mechanical, his eyes distant. Keith wasn't here, not really. His thoughts were in another place, with another man, and it hurt as much as Thace thought it would. His heart weighed like a dead lump of ice in his chest. He would suffer in silence as long as Keith found relief with him. If Keith held on to the hope that Shiro would come for him, Thace would not have been here, not like this. But Shiro was gone. Nothing could stop the impending doom of Shiro's marriage; the blow to the new alliance would be too violent, far too destructive. There was no hope. None. Thace knew it.

And Keith knew it too.

So Thace would do what he was asked. He unbuttoned his own jacket, folding it before he placed it on the desk. He didn't look at Keith, but hurried to pull off pants and shirt, underwear as well, not caring about his vulnerable state of mind, his vulnerable body, displayed and naked. When he was done, he turned. Keith was just standing there, as limp as Thace. It was not about lust. It was pain relief. Thace looked at him, at his naked body. Keith looked a little different from other half-Galra, not unappealing, but different. 

Thace hesitated. He waited. 

"I'm… human. Not Galra. Down here." Keith waved in the direction of his own groin. 

"What must I do?" It was clinical and cold, no more than a transaction. 

"Oil. Lube. Or— dunno." Keith looked at the spot between Thace's legs where his cock peeked from its slit, sadly disinterested. "I haven't… with a Galra."

The question came unbidden, but Thace could not have held it back if he tried. "Are you sure, Keith. Of this? You being here." This time Thace did touch Keith, a light brush of fingers across his cheek. 

This time there was rage. Action. "I'll never get him now. He is gone, Thace." Keith's face contracted in anger. "He doesn't give a fuck about me, and I am not waiting for something that will never happen. I can't have him, so what? I choose you. I heard what Shiro said, what he asked of you. _Take care of Keith_ , he said, like I'm some kind of lost puppy to pass around until somebody cares enough about me to keep me." Keith took a step forward. "I won't let him do that to you."

Thace frowned, forcing himself to stay still, not move. "Shiro does care about you. As do I. I came willingly."

Disbelief drew a worried line on Keith's forehead. "You came willingly, right. You were just the one who went to look for me. If it had been Antok or Regris, he'd have asked them."

"Perhaps. But they would not have agreed." 

"And you would? You did. Are you that stupid? Earth's atmosphere mess with your head?"

The anger was contagious. Thace felt his control slipping, his tight control over his innermost secret, the one that Shiro must have seen. Thace did not want to argue with Keith, but Shiro would never have asked Antok or Regris or anyone else. Thace was sure that Shiro would have come for him. He would have asked no matter where in the galaxy he would've been. "No, Keith. No atmosphere messed with me. _Love_ did."

The frown deepened, like Keith did not understand, not very likely. "Love?" he asked, the word pronounced slowly, like he had to taste it before it was formed into sound. "You mean..."

"Yes." Thace swallowed, waiting for a reaction. He looked Keith straight in the eye, willing him not to ask. "Love."

"Then what the quiznak are you waiting for, you fool," Keith sneered, taking the last steps between them in one stride. Then his arms were around Thace's neck, a warm furless body pressed against his. 

There were a few answers to that, and none that Thace cared to think about. He preferred not to think at all. He would deal with his own pain later, this was about Keith, about Keith's needs.

Human lips were strangely soft and full. Thace let Keith in willingly, sighing as Keith slid his tongue inside, careful not to cut himself. _Small. He is so small_ , Thace thought, relishing the smooth furless skin, the curve of the ribs, the narrow, fine waist. The soft hills of hipbones, the fuller ass. Thace closed his hands around two firm globes, pulling Keith tight. Thace breathed in, taking in the scent of sweat and a smell he didn't really know, maybe grass or trees. Something human.

"If you ask me one more time if I really want you to fuck me, you can go jerk off in the bathroom," Keith growled, voice low and threatening. 

"I'm not asking again," Thace replied, backing Keith towards the bed. "I am not." He would do with what Keith wanted, no questions asked. He knew Keith well enough to know that even under the threat of death Keith usually kept his head on straight, if sometimes very hot. He had to trust Keith's judgement. If he said he wanted to have intercourse, they would have intercourse. They would be putting out fire with Quintessence anyway, so Thace simply gave up fighting to do the right thing, even though the concept of right and wrong at the moment eluded him entirely.

"Make me forget," Keith murmured, his lips on Thace's neck. His breath was hot little puffs, ghosts that haunted Thace's fur, fluffing it up and leaving it a mess. Like his heart.

Forcing his feelings to cease interfering, Thace replaced them with his fantasies, enjoyed far too often in the recent months. Keith naked under him. Keith moaning his name over and over as he took him. Keith pinned down, legs spread wide as Thace made love to him. 

Thace's cock stirred and filled. If only he could chase the ghost of Shiro's refusal away, mending the wounds that Shiro's hard choice had inflicted. He knew he couldn't. All he could offer was pleasure, physical bliss to override the pain.

Keith had wounds. They all had. 

If Keith meant what he said when he told Thace to be there for him, Thace had to learn to live with someone who did not love him. He would live, hoping for a day that might never come. Until then, they could give each other relief, pleasure, comfort. Sex would take the place of the love they had for those who could not love them. At least Thace wasn't a beginner when it came to pleasures of the flesh. Blades and soldiers alike knew how to offer and give release, and Thace was no stranger to either. Often comfort worked better when the senses were overwhelmed, the urge for sex overpowering the sights and sounds of battle and dying comrades. He could give Keith that.

Thace pulled back a little, forcing Keith to let go. With a hand in Keith's hair, Thace pulled, none too gently, tilting Keith's face up. Licking his lips, tongue sliding over sharp canines, Thace leaned down, kissing Keith with force, no hesitation, no careful, sensitive waiting for the right moment. It was a violent kiss, rough and gritty, demanding Keith's immediate surrender. It came instantly. Keith moaned, not caring that he shared his breath with Thace, mouth inviting and hot. He was sucking at Thace's tongue, arms tight around Thace's neck, undulating against his groin. Thace's wet cock was smearing a mess across Keith's stomach, not that he cared that instant. He wanted Keith marked so that all Galra knew that Keith was his.

If only. 

He let himself sink into the pleasure of touching, hands sliding over Keith's skin, examining the sinewy muscles of his upper arms, the slender wrists.

Keith made a very undignified sound. "Thace... Mhm, I—" Keith hissed and rolled his hips against Thace's cock, his small human dick fattening.

Thace let his hand slide up Keith's arm, over his chest, brushing a nipple. Keith whined, gasping as his breath hitched. The little pink nub peaked nicely at the touch. Thace let out his claws, teasing it to see how Keith would react.

The reaction was satisfactory. 

"Thace, oh fuck." Keith squirmed, then arched his back, frowning and moaning as Thace used his claws again, pinching the bud into a deep pink. Keith would be sore tomorrow. 

"Like this?" Thace smiled against Keith's mouth. "Hard?" Thace grabbed a handful of Keith's hair, almost yanking it. He liked human hair, it was even better than Galra fur; not many had hair long enough to get a good hold of. It gave Thace the feeling that he could hold on to Keith, that it would be impossible for him to escape.

Keith's reply was unintelligible.

Thace stepped forward, pressing his thigh between Keith's legs. His cock was fully hard, at least Thace thought it was; it was his first contact with a human's penis. He didn't know how it was supposed to feel, but Keith's cock was plump and pink and lovely. Thace wanted to taste it, lick it, find out how it felt on his tongue. How Keith tasted, how he felt, the smooth silken skin under Thace's fingers. He tightened his grip on Keith's hair, enjoying the weak moans that Keith made in surrender. With closed eyes and blushing cheeks, mouth half open, Keith was beautiful. 

Thace kissed Keith again, swallowing his moans, the kisses wet and cruel, no respite given before one kiss took the next. Keith was warm and soft, his furless skin hot. Arm around Keith's waist to support him, Thace maneuvered them the few steps to the bed. Keith made a dark moan as the back of his thighs hit the edge of it. Letting go of Keith's mouth, Thace placed a final lick to Keith's lips, with no warning picking Keith up to put him down on the bed. 

Keith was looking up at him, eyes wild, like he was in battle. He got up on his elbows. His gaze was burning with determination. "This is yours," he said, voice dark. "Now take it." The spread legs were an invitation that Thace despite his attempt at being patient could not withstand. His own cock was hard, the naked skin glistening with his semen, the slick fluid covering it. 

Keith's eyes moved downwards. "Maybe we don't need any lube?" He shuffled a little, enough to reach for Thace's cock. One finger trailed from his knot to the sloping tip. "Put it in me."

"No." Thace wanted his control back. Control allowed him to proceed with care, make sure that Keith was treated right, that he got what he wanted. Most of all, Thace wanted to be able to stop if Keith wanted him to stop. He had sworn he would take care of Keith, no matter what Keith demanded of him. Keith's word was his law. 

"Lie down. You will get it when I say you do. Understood?" Thace's voice was low and firm. He looked for signs of uneasiness, anything that told him that they were going too far too fast. Keith was at his most vulnerable, and if anything, Thace did not want to take advantage of the situation more than he'd done already. It was Keith who wanted them in bed, but that did not mean that he wanted them to stay there, not when they got more intimate.

Keith made a low growl in response, his eyes glinting, teeth bared. 

Thace liked it, Keith's Galra side peeking out. He didn't mind seeing more of it, not least because it might do Keith good to let himself be ruled by instinct right now, not thinking too much, just letting lust and attraction take him where they went. Thace knew how the flow of inherent aggression could take the top off the pain. It would return soon enough for both of them. For now, Thace wanted to sink into a sea of pleasure, forgetting that Keith was not his, not truly, not yet, perhaps never. But Keith was looking up at him with eyes deep and dark, lips an unfamiliar red, human. Human and tempting. Thace let himself fall into temptation. He got on his knees on the bed. It dipped under him, emitting a vague scent of flowers or soap. He put his hands on Keith's knees, claws out, pushing his legs apart. 

Keith made a soft hiss, his small cock throbbing. Thace did it again. It pleased him that Keith was so responsive to his touch, even in this tangle of hurt. If he at least could enjoy sex while mending his broken heart, then Thace would do the same although he knew his heart would not recover easily, if ever. 

"Thace, please." Keith squirmed on the sheets, his pink opening glistening and alluring. 

Thace smiled, satisfied with the reaction. He wanted to touch Keith, examine him with tongue and fingers and lips. Teeth. Eyes trained on Keith, Thace reached between his own legs, pumping his own cock a few times, coating his fingers with the greasy fluid. If humans did not lubricate like most Galra for penetration, they would need a great deal of it. Thace gathered as much as he could, his juices feeling warm and slightly sticky on his fingers. 

Keith moaned loudly, his back a perfect arc on the bed as Thace slid his oily fingers across his hole. Keith's moan turned into a whimper when Thace pressed a fingertip against the opening, claw carefully retracted. It slid into Keith easily, smooth and wet. Keith clenched around it, murmuring unintelligibly into the pillow.

Thace pulled back a little, then pushed back in when Keith relaxed, a wordless welcome that made Thace's cock even harder. Keith was wet enough for it to make a squelching sound, lewd and dirty. 

"Oh, god, fuck, that's—" Keith threw his head back, body tense. "What's it—" Thace moved closer, his dripping cock slapping against Keith's thigh. Thace thrust in his finger again, slow and deep. Keith liked it well enough, judging from the short, shallow breaths he took. "More," Keith demanded; begging was off in favor of orders. 

Pressing a kiss to Keith's bended knee, exploring the hardness of the bone, the softness of the skin, Thace made a raw purr when Keith reached for him, Keith's slender fingers brushing the naked skin of his cock. "Oh," Thace let out, the sound drowned out by the loud purring. "Oh." He had dreamed of this, fantasized about Keith's touches, thought of small human hands on his dick, of this pink hole, opening up to him.

Keeping the sad thoughts at bay, Thace concentrated on the attraction and the lust they had for each other, even here, in the middle of the mess that Shiro had left for them to clean up.

Keith moved his hand, tight, twisting it, and Thace lost most of his ability to form any coherent thoughts. Pleasure surged through his body, making him dizzy and needy. Keith's heavy lids covered a calculating, almost seductive stare.

"You like that?" Keith breathed, twisting his hand again, brushing nails over the tip of Thace's cock.

"Well enough," Thace groaned, attempting to take back a little control. "And you? You want more of this? He put in another digit, spreading Keith's thighs further so that he could see his fingers disappear into Keith's body.

Keith moaned softly. He felt soft and warm and welcoming, like his body approved of their union, even if his mind and heart weren't in it. Keith was playing with Thace's cock, the small hand feeling strangely soft on his bare, wet skin. Thace hissed when Keith stroked him again, tighter, pulling at the ridges on his shaft.

"Okay?" Keith asked, mid-moan, loosening his grip. "Thace?"

"'s good." Thace liked it when his ridges were teased, didn't mind a claw or nail brushing—or bruising—them. 

Thace thrust his fingers into Keith's hole in retaliation, his arousal flaring at the scent of Keith's semen, barely a few drops pearling on the tip of his cock. Combined with Thace's own smell it was arousing, making his lust flare again. He bit his lip, one fang, deep and painful, to keep a clear head in case Keith regretted that he was giving himself to another man, a man who was not Shiro.

"Please," Keith groaned, letting go of Thace's dick. He put his hand back on the headboard, keeping both of them there. "Thace, please." Keith spread his legs even wider, Thace's oily semen glistening between his legs, on his cock.

 _Quiznak_. The boy knew how to beg. He was gorgeous, the most beautiful being Thace had ever laid eyes on. Galra in every way, except for fur and size, and still the quintessence of what Thace found appealing. Keith's mix of human and Galra had created a perfect being.

"Fuck me," Keith demanded again, unknowingly reminding Thace that Keith was not a divine being. "Thace, I need it. I need you."

 _I need you to help me forget_ hung unsaid between them. Thace drew on his long training as an undercover spy to keep his emotions from showing. He concentrated on Keith's body, his pretty little cock, the part of him that was definitely on par with Thace's own needs.

With three fingers in Keith's ass, his moans getting louder, Thace moved closer, taking his own cock in hand. "Bare?" he asked, knowing that their many visits to the cryo-pods guaranteed that neither was at a risk.

Keith's only reply was a string of hoarse _please, please, please_. Thace decided it was enough for him to move forward. Hesitating for a second to catch Keith's dazed eyes, Thace complied. The tip of his dick slid into Keith's hole. _Ancients_ , it was warm and tight, so hot and tight, tighter than any Galra he had been with. 

"Oh, Keith." Thace let out a deep moan as he felt Keith respond, relaxing to receive him inside. Still restraining himself on Thace's order, Keith was arousing, enticing, perfect. Thace pressed on, a slow, persistent slide, opening Keith up on his cock. Compared to a human's it was large, maybe too big for Keith's body to accommodate.

Keith didn't seem to feel any discomfort, on the contrary. He moaned darkly, gasped, then closed his eyes, frowning, riding the wave of pleasure-pain, moving his hips to help the slide into him. "Fuck, Thace," was all that he said, words turning into more moans as Thace bottomed out, in as far as he could go, his flared cock almost in to the hilt, already pumping come into Keith's belly. 

Oh, he wanted to fill Keith up so badly, wanted to have all of him, body, mind, and heart. Thace forced those thoughts down, concentrating on giving Keith what he wanted and needed. Keith was moving under him, undulating, head turned to one side, mouth tense. He let out little pained sound, like he couldn't decide whether it was too much or not. Thace hesitated, holding himself up on both arms. "Keith—"

"Move, dammit," Keith hissed. "I want—" He gasped, swallowed and turned to look up at Thace. "I _need_ you." He reached out, his small hand trembling for a second before he put it on Thace's cheek. "I need you, Thace."

Thace's smile might have been sad because there was no response to it. "You have me." Thace's heart was burning with pain. "Keith, anything you want."

"I know." Keith moved his hand to the nape of Thace's neck. He pulled him in, sighing. "Kiss me. Please?"

Thace obeyed, unable to deny Keith anything. He followed Keith down, mouth on his, tongue exploring and tasting, Keith's tongue pressing against his own, sliding wet and teasing between his lips, across his fangs, deep into his mouth. Thace's moan was almost a growl. 

Keith replied to the needy groan with a roll of his hips, sighing into Thace's mouth when his cock was forced further in. It had to hurt, but Thace didn't force it, he only let Keith do what he wanted. Keith wrapped a leg around Thace's waist. He answered the need by pulling Keith's close, hand on his hip, Keith held down by Thace's weight. Keith reached up, grabbing the headboard, like he wanted to feel restricted, tied up.

'Like that, god, Thace, yes." Keith arched his back, his throat stretched and bared, a long line of taut muscles and flawless skin. "Mmm, more!" Words turned into a jumbled mess as Keith moved and moaned, soft and compliant one moment, tense and demanding the next. 

Thace let his mind go blank, letting in only the physical sensations. The heat and tightness of Keith's body. The slide of his lean muscles under his perfect, hairless skin. The way his lips curled when Thace pushed into him, leaving little moans along the road of the pleasure. Black hair over a white pillow. A red drop of blood when Keith cut his tongue in a deep kiss, a fang getting in the way. The taste of iron. Thace got into the ebb and flow of pleasure, an ocean taking them both as Keith got closer to the edge, his moans turning to cries, and deep sobs, his throat bared to Thace as he turned his head away. Thace forced himself to pay attention to Keith, holding back, slowing down, his thrusts less violent. If Keith wasn't feeling good, perhaps they should stop.

The whisper was loud enough for Thace to hear.

"Shiro, Shiro!" Keith's voice broke, turning into another heartbreaking sob.

It hurt. Thace knew that Keith's thoughts would be elsewhere, but to have it out in the open, have it said to his face… He had no one to blame but himself. It was what he had agreed to. "Keith?" Thace stopped thrusting.

"No, please, don't... Thace, don't stop. I'm sorry!" Keith squirmed under him, nails digging into Thace's shoulders, crescent-shaped pain to go with the pain in his heart. Keith's eyes shone purple in the dim light. "Don't stop!" Keith undulated his hips, forcing Thace in deep before he stopped, legs around Thace's thighs. "Fuck me, Thace. Just... take me as hard as you can. Make me forget. Fuck me so fast I can't remember anything but you. I need it, I need… rough. Don't stop. Don't leave me. Don't ever leave me. Don't— I need—"

Thace didn't argue. No matter the hurt, no matter the consequences, he was here to help Keith. He pushed himself up, slamming in so hard that Keith had to brace himself against the headboard. "Hard enough?" he snarled, letting loose strength and anger and all the homeless love he had for Keith. "Hard enough to make you forget?"

Letting out a deep moan, Keith pushed back, snapping his hips up. "More."

Keith's desperation was contagious Thace let aggression take over; he needed that to go through with it. "Should I bite you and mate with you?" he growled. "Would that be enough for you? To make sure I am yours and you are mine?" Thace hissed, picking Keith up by the waist, shoulders pressing into the mattress. Keith cried out, a muffled scream fading into whimpering moans as Thace fucked into him forcefully, the lewd, squelching sound of Thace's own fluids accompanying his effort. Keith's legs were tight around his waist, but Thace set a pace so fast that Keith had to let go, lying there like a dead weight, unable to do anything but take it. "Do you want to be mine?" Thace growled, possessiveness welling up inside him, a furnace of need to mate and own. "Mine," he moaned as his pressed into Keith's body.

"Yeah, God, yes! Fuck!" Keith writhed, one hand pulling at the bedspread, the other digging into Thace's fur, scratching and pulling. 

"I'll make you mine," Thace grunted, for once letting out all the rage, all the need to mate and take and have. He let go so that Keith would understand that he belonged here, with him. It was base needs, instinct and nothing else, all sense and sensibility gone. Mate, need, have. Thace rarely let control slip, and now he did. He slammed into Keith, again and again, teeth on his skin, claws digging into his flesh. And Thace enjoyed it, every thrust, every bite, every devastating kiss.

Keith was sobbing, wrecked and done for. He had left marks on Thace's skin, too, welts buried in the smooth fur on his neck. He had clawed his marks into Thace's back. It would leave scars. Thace groaned as he felt blood drip from one of the gashes; Keith had marked him, and that meant something to a Galra. It almost pulled Thace over the edge. 

"Wanna be yours," Keith gasped, before he ceased moving, frozen, eyes closed and mouth open in a strained gasp. He shuddered and came, the oddly thick fluid pulsing over his stomach and hips. 

"You will be," Thace sighed, allowing himself to let go, throwing himself in the undercurrent of pleasure that had threatened to pull him down. Now he went willingly, mind blank, body shaken by the immense satisfaction of being with Keith, his mate, his. 

Keith's lithe body was steel, able to take Thace's hard thrusts, his ass clenched hard around Thace's cock. The pressure made Thace pause, pulling back a little before he was coming in big splashes in Keith, onto Keith's body.

 _Mine._ It was all Thace could think of, dizzy and content, caught up in the warmth of his release. For the first time in a very long time, all that mattered was the next kiss, the moment they were in, both of them. He slumped down on top of Keith, lips to his neck, a hand on his waist, breathing heavily, the long orgasm still lingering in his veins. He pulled Keith with him, one leg around his hip, Keith's arms locked around his neck. Thace slid his arms around Keith as well, stroking his sweaty back, trying to catch his breath. Keith was breathing heavily, his chest moving rapidly. 

The room was quiet apart from the sound of their breathing. Outside in the corridor somebody walked past, somebodies; there were sounds of chatter and laughter. Thace grimaced. It felt like an intrusion. 

Keith was still having a hard time breathing, his face pressed against Thace's chest. Thace frowned. There was something wet on his clavicle. Tears. It didn't come as a surprise; Keith had been remarkably collected, throwing himself into... _this_. Maybe not so well thought-through, for neither of them. But it was how it was, Keith's way of dealing with pain, hiding it, keeping on going until it became too much. Thace's own pain was... constant. 

Thace combed his fingers through Keith's hair, hoping that it would feel as calming for a human as it felt for a Galra. "Keith, are you all right?"

The reply was a muffled cry hidden against Thace's neck, damp with tears. 

'It's fine, let it go,' Thace urged, both hoping and fearing that Keith would do as he said.

"I—" Keith breathed, voice ragged, torn up. "I wanted this with Shiro. For so long I wanted this with him. I didn't want to hurt you like that. And now I can never… I'm sorry, I'm so, so sor—"

"No. Don't." Thace's heart felt like lead, heavy and filled with poison. That instant he wished he could have hated Shiro, but he did not have it in him. Shiro had chosen his love of peace and the universe over Keith, and Thace sympathized. Shiro was a gentle soul, even after captivity, after years of war. Thace sighed. He eased out carefully, as gentle as he could be. He hurried to cover Keith with the comforter, offering him the feeble sense of privacy and distance that it could give. "I understand. Do you want me to stay, or do you prefer to be left alone?" Thace's heart hurt for both of them. His own pain had to wait. 

Panic flashed in Keith's eyes. "Don't leave me! Thace, please? Don't leave!" Clinging to the comforter, eyes wild with pain and fear, Keith was... afraid?

For a second, Thace was stunned. His experience with human emotion was limited, at least when it was this deep, but he recognized it far too well. Loss, abandonment, fear of being alone, fear of separation… He had learned to deal with these emotions, like all Galra soldiers, suppressing such notions, pretending to care for no one until the feelings perished from lack of nourishment. He wondered who, other than Shiro and Krolia, had left Keith, leaving him so afraid of loss. Strange, seeing that Thace had never thought of Keith as being particularly social or in need of anyone… although Keith had often broken protocol to make sure they all made it out from a raid. But afraid? Never. Now the fear was almost palpable, inflamed with the obvious rejection of him that Shiro's upcoming alliance represented. 

Slowly, Thace reached out, hand open, like he would approach a scared animal, a doe shivering from fear in the dark of a forest. "I will never leave you, not unless you ask me to leave. I promised I would take care of you. Any way you want me, Keith." Thace put his larger hand over Keith's, squeezing it, keeping it there until Keith could breathe again, the tension seeping out of him. He loosened his grip on the comforter and sighed, turning his hand under Thace's.

Thace could just as well address the problem. They both knew why they were here. "I know how you feel about Shiro," Thace began, watching Keith's expression in the dim light. Nothing, no reaction. Good. He continued, knowing it would hurt. It needed to be said anyway. "You are in love with Shiro. I am in love with you. It does not matter what you say in bed; I know you would rather be with him, and whether it is said aloud or hidden is of no consequence. I accepted those conditions, Keith."

Keith's neutral face fell, replaced with a grimace of pain and hidden tears. "I don't want to hurt—"

Thace put a finger on Keith's mouth. "I know you do not. No matter what you say, no matter that the pain you are in is caused by your love for another man, I am not leaving you unless you ask me to leave." Thace was not sure he could say it even clearer unless he declared his undying love to Keith, the overwhelming need to claim him. This was neither the time, nor the place, so Thace kept quiet. Instead he got back into the bed, next to Keith, not touching him. He lay there, silent, as the ticks passed by. They both did. 

Then Keith sighed, squirming a little, pulling at Thace's arm. He shuffled closer, head on Thace's shoulder, face nearly turned into Thace's armpit. 

"Are you well, hiding in there?" Thace murmured, knowing that it would take a long time before Keith would be good anywhere.

"Mm-hm." It was an answer as good as any. Better than none. 

They lay like that for some time, Thace's slow strokes making Keith relax. His breathing aligned with the touches, calm waves of inhales and exhales. Maybe Keith had fallen asleep? Thace hoped so; sleep could save him some of the pain, not that it would be _better_ when Keith woke up, only _later_. He pulled the blankets up around them, creating a cosy den for the both of them, trying to provide for Keith what he thought would comfort him. 

Keith stirred. "Thace?"

"Mm-hm?" Thace asked, half purr. 

"'m sorry."

"No. I knew what I did." Thace continued the soft strokes, ears turned backwards as the only sign of unease. "I wish it could have been different. For both of us."

"I don't want to talk about him again," Keith said. "It's a closed chapter."

"I see." Thace did not want to talk about Shiro, per se, other than as a comrade, a friend. Yet he would talk about him as a means to ease Keith's pain. He turned to look at Keith, preventing him from hiding himself and his emotions. 

"I didn't want to hurt you," Keith said, eyes barely open, but enough so that Thace could see him looking at him. "I'll do my best not to."

"You don't need to think about that—"

"You said you'd do anything for me," Keith interrupted, raising up on one arm, looking down at him. "Would you still?" 

"I swore."

"You swore to him. To Shiro." Keith's eyes narrowed. "Not to me. Now _I_ ask."

"Yes. Yes, I will do anything for you." 

"You sure?"

Of course he was. Keith was level-headed; he would not ask anything unreasonable. Thace got up too, resting on one elbow, the other hand on Keith's hip. "Keith, except killing Shiro for revenge and start the war all over again, there is nothing I wouldn't do for you." Thace smiled a sad smile.

"And you were telling the truth when you said you would never leave me?"

"Yes."

"Good," Keith said, face serious. "Then marry me."

"I—" Thace gasped, wondering where all the oxygen had gone. "But—"

"Marry me," Keith repeated. "I'm asking you. I want it done before Sunday, before _he_ — I want to marry you _now_ , so you know I made my choice while there was still a chance that he… that he would regret and come back to—"

"Come back to you. It might happen, although I think he made his decision. So why, Keith?"

Keith looked as if it was very difficult to get the words out. "I have been alone for so long. Until now, Shiro never gave up on me, and I didn't give up on him. He saved me so many times and I still…" Keith paused, closing his eyes, taking a deep breath. "I am not giving up on him and if I won't give him up, then I have to accept his choice. I do that by making my own. We—you and me—both know I'm still in love with Shiro, but maybe I won't always be. If you had asked me to pick someone other than Shiro," Keith said, looking up a Thace, a slight frown over his serious eyes, "I mean, before all this arranged alliance crap started, and it would have been mostly hypothetical—" He paused, like he had to mull it over. "—it would have be you."

Thace was about to say something, but for all the words in the universe, he could not decide what. Instead he just stared at Keith.

Keith smiled through tears and pain. "You're eligible for alliance. For others to take. I won't let them. I won't let anyone else have you. I was slow and stupid and afraid and it made me lose Shiro. I won't let it happen a second time. I won't lose you, Thace. So marry me."


	6. Chapter 6

The sun was up outside. Thace could feel its warmth through the heavy curtains, Earth so different from his time on Galra ships, always hidden in the dark of the universe as soon as they weren't attacking or foraging. Thace lay for a while, listening to Keith's slow, relaxed breathing. It might be the last and only time he would see the man he loved like this, sleeping and vulnerable. 

Thace had a plan. 

Quietly he disentangled himself from Keith's embrace. "I'll be back," Thace whispered into the mess of dark hair, pressing a few kisses to it, another to Keith's slightly open mouth, a gentle, sweet kiss. Thace hesitated, wanting to remember the sight of Keith, the smell of him: sweat, morning breath, sex. He wanted it imprinted on his mind: the dark sweep of his eyelashes, the curve of his lips, dark red from their many kisses. 

Thace's eyes felt heavy with tears and sadness. Yet he knew that he did not love very much if he refused to help Keith to find happiness. Thace wanted him to be happy. He wasn't sure he could do what he set out to do, but that fact had never prevented a Blade of Marmora from acting anyway, so he owed it to Keith and to himself to at least try. 

Thace reached out one last time, stroking Keith's cheek. "I love you," he whispered, his heart as broken as the words. 

Keith moved in his sleep. "Shiro," he breathed, smiling before he settled, breathing calmly, falling back into deep sleep, like the thought of Shiro was all he needed to be content and relaxed. 

Thace rubbed the back of his hand across his burning eyes. He rose, grabbing his clothes on the way to the bathroom. It took him only a few minutes to shower and get dressed, keeping quiet as not to wake up Keith. He hoped he would return not as a lover, but as the bearer of good news. 

Thace left the bedroom without looking at Keith again. He wasn't sure he would be able to go through with his plan if he did. 

_Ancients_ , he loved Keith so much.

***

The hall was quiet. Passing Kolivan's door, Thace could hear the rumble of Kolivan's voice and Lance's clear laughter, bright and warm, like the sound of sunlight. It brought a much-needed smile to his face. At least some of them were happy with their choice. Given the chance, Kolivan hadn't hesitated. He had known what he wanted, and he had reached for it. With more luck than anyone, probably even Kolivan himself, had expected. Lance's immediate compliance and his accept of Kolivan's proposal certainly had been a surprise to everybody, since Kolivan did not in any way, shape, or form looke like the girls that Lance used to flirt with.

Standing outside Shiro's room, Thace heard no sound coming from it. So maybe he had not accepted the Galra proposal? With a glimmer of hope for Keith, Thace knocked on the door. The knocking echoed loudly between the high walls in the hallway. It took a little before Thace heard footsteps. The door opened. 

Shiro stared at him with red-rimmed eyes, his expression so like Keith's that Thace had to calm himself as not to lose the hard grip on his raging emotions. "Thace? is Keith... is Keith—"

"May I enter?" Thace had no patience for Shiro. It was not that he disliked him, on the contrary. Shiro was his friend but the only person whose wellbeing meant something to Thace this early morning was Keith. "I wish to speak with you."

"Oh. Yes." Shiro stepped aside. "I'm— is Kei—"

"Do _not_. You have lost the right to speak of him," Thace snapped before he could stop himself. "I am here so that you can win it back."

Shiro turned his back to Thace, reaching for a chair. He sank down on it, movements weary. "What do you mean?" He tilted his head questioningly. 

Thace didn't begrudge Shiro the lack of comprehension. Thace was angry and not very clear about his plan. "I mean that you should tell Princess Allura that you withdraw your offer of marriage. Keith is in love with you. You are hurting him, Shiro. Take your offer back and take instead what is rightfully yours to take." Every word was a blade to his heart, but Thace knew it was the right thing to do. He had to fight for Keith's happiness. He had promised Shiro to take care of Keith and right this instant he was doing exactly that. "Please. You could be so happy with him. Be selfish for once, let the rest of us deal with—"

Shiro's face was a study in how inner pain could wreck a person. The torment he was going through was clear as the day. "It's too late."

Thace took pity in Shiro. He put a gentle hand on Shiro's shoulder, squeezing it lightly. "It is never too late."

"It'll ruin any peace progress we made. I can't— I know I didn't think it through, Thace, knowing that Keith... hoping... but we never, even through years of battle... we... I thought he saw me as his _friend_. I couldn't tell him— Even when he told me he loved me, I thought he saw me as a mentor or a big brother."

"Then do it now. Before he does something _he_ cannot take back."

Shiro stood, fear painted all over his face. "You mean… is he— is he going to—"

Thace knew what Shiro was asking. "No, there are no suicide missions ahead. Besides, Keith's sacrifices were never driven by a need to destroy himself, but by a need to protect. You know that as well as I do. He would never kill himself for such a reason. For the mission, but not for the heart, not for his own heart, at least. You _know_ him, Shiro. Better than anyone."

Shiro swallowed, then rubbed his neck. "I am engaged to be married. To the Galra Empire. The ramifications of a broken engagement, Thace—" Shiro shook his head. "It cannot be fixed. The offence and the humiliation… they would never stand for it. It'll mean war if I break it off."

Thace's eyebrows shot up. It had to be... "Prince Lotor?"

Shiro's laughter was bitter. "No. It's worse than that. Lotor would have been… preferable. It's Commander Sendak."

Thace was speechless. It took a while to get the name out. "Sen... dak?" he asked, knowing that Shiro spoke the truth. "Commander Sendak?" he said again, disbelievingly. 

Shiro's face fell. "Yes. The one and only. I accepted, in case you thought I wouldn't. You understand now?"

Thace did. He little practice or time for tenderness; it was a weakness and not appreciated among the Galra, yet now he could not hold back his feelings. He sighed, embracing Shiro, offering him what little comfort he could, a comfort that he would be denied in the future as well, Thace was sure. He knew Commander Sendak only far too well. He was colder than ice, and about as welcoming as a glacier.

Thace could feel how determination made Shiro's body tense in defense, like he was getting ready for combat. "I asked you to take care of Keith. Are you still willing? He will need you, he—"

"Shiro, please, listen to me." Thace would do anything, but as it stood, it would be futile, he knew that already. If it had been Lotor, perhaps Shiro's freedom would be salvageable, but Sendak? Sendak was the one who had brought over Zarkon's supporters, the purebloods, the military elite that had fought against Lotor and Allura. Sendak was pure honor and duty. A promise to him meant _everything_. He would tear down the alliance if such an enormous slight as a broken engagement was put upon him. Shiro wasn't joking when he said it would mean war.

"I know it is a lot to ask but Kei—"

"He wants to get married. Before you do. He wishes to take a mate from those who have given themselves up to alliance. It's retaliation, even though he doesn't see it as such. He's reliving some kind of abandonment."

The shock hit Shiro with a deadly force. If he had looked like he was in pain before, it was nothing compared to his expression now. Thace wondered if it was anything like how he felt, this immense, oppressive ache that nothing would cure, the hopelessness and despair, the devastating hurt that sat in his heart so heavily that he believed that it would never move. 

"Married?" The word was merely a gasp, all his surprise and shock concentrated in a broken outburst.

"Yes. He wants it done before you marry. He wants you to realize that he made his choice, knowing that you could still reject the Galra who asked for your hand." Thace paused, trying to control the pain that bloomed inside him, wrapping its thorny vines around his heart."He is determined. I cannot let it happen. Not as long as there is still hope that you could... that you could revoke your offer of alliance. But with Sendak—" Thace shook his head. 

Shiro frowned again, his handsome face marred by the harsh lines of worry. "If I took my promise back it would be as good as a declaration of war. I cannot. If we—" He closed his eyes, leaning back against the wall, pain overtaking his entire expression. If we play with the idea that this was possible, and I refused the offer I already accepted, Sendak would pull all the Hub's commanders with him and turn on Lotor. We'd have insurgents on our hands. The alliance between the Galra and the Coalition is fragile, barely in its infancy. The Council... it'd dissolve before out eyes; they have issues enough to deal with and squabble about." He stopped, taking a deep, shaky breath. "And if I survived that war—assuming we'd survive Sendak's inevitable attempt at revenge for honor or some such—then Lotor would make my life, what little would be left of it, pure hell." Shiro huffed. "I would endure that for Keith, yet he would be in danger too. Sendak—"

"Commander Sendak, despite his many bad sides, is an honorable man. He might not take it out on Keith." Thace knew that his arguments, every single one of them, were invalid the moment Shiro had mentioned Sendak. It was done, over. They both knew that they could take no risks with Keith's life; Sendak was not unpredictable, but when it came to Keith, they had to be sure. Thace would gladly fight Sendak if necessary. He might even win, but it would still put them at risk of war.

"No," Shiro said. "It's impossible. As much as I am a symbol, so is Sendak. That is why I agreed. I am not... I know he is honorable and dutiful. Or I learned that he is. We—" At the word denoting them a couple, Shiro laughed bitterly. " _We_ are going to be the shining example of how enemies are able to turn enmity into—" Shiro's face contracted in disgust. "Into love. I am sure we will be convincing. Maybe I'll get an Oscar for it. The acting, I mean. That is what he told me: that we need to pretend, be convincing."

Thace did not know what an Oscar was, and thus had nothing to say. He waited.

"Keith?" Shiro finally said. "He is marrying—"

"Me," Thace said. "He picked me. I have not yet given him an answer."

Shiro's arm flashed brightly as it went in combat mode.

"I'm sorry," Shiro said, face ashamed as he cradled the bionic arm with his organic one. "I can't really allow myself to be—"

"No, you cannot." Thace offered no shelter this time. "I wish to accept his proposal. I swore to you that I would stand by him every step of the way to healing: I will do anything to help him through the pain. I am his if he wants me, yet I could not in good conscience mate with him and marry before I tried my utmost to care for his happiness and give him what he wanted the most."

Shiro looked suspicious. "You are either too good for this world, or you do not want to marry him at all."

Thace surprised even himself with the harsh laughter that left his chest. He shook his head, anger rising before he managed to calm himself. "I am not good, nor do I want to resist marriage. I am, on the contrary, selfish in this. I would gladly abandon my own happiness for him, but now that I see that it changes nothing, I want to be sure I can keep what I am offered. I will not take him from another man, the one he most wants to be with, but since he does not want him, I _will_ accept the offer."

Shiro stared at Thace, eyes strangely hard. "I knew you liked him. I have seen you look at him, that you desired him." Shiro sighed, his expression turning softer. "But that is not it. You _love_ him."

Somehow it did not come as a surprise that Shiro had seen it. "Yes. I have been in love with him since the day I first saw him, and I have loved him for almost as long. It is no burden to take him as my husband, but before my own happiness, above it, is his. Always."

This time Shiro did not hide his devastation. There were tears glittering in the corners of his eyes. He reached for Thace and clasped his hand onto his arm, clinging to it. He closed his eyes, like he could shut out the hurt. "I cannot do anything but to wish you luck. I know that Keith is hurt and you... you are making yet another sacrifice." Shiro opened his eyes, raincloud grey and teary. "I feel better, knowing that you will take care of him. I wish I could stop all of this, but we are both realists, you and I, as is Keith, and we know we cannot stop this, not without causing a severe diplomatic crisis at best. No one wants war."

Thace nodded. "Tonight is a time for regrets. Tomorrow we must both be strong." Thace stroked Shiro's hand, his back, holding him as he slumped down, a slain warrior with no more fight left in him.

"I regret that I was not brave enough to ask before I threw myself into—" Shiro waved with a hand. "—into this mess. I could have—"

"It is done. Let not regret rule you. Done is done." Thace knew he had betrayed Keith's trust by going behind his back, to Shiro, yet he had done what he came for, albeit not with the outcome he had feared the most, but hoped for for Keith's sake. "Let us not think of what was, but of the future. It might seem bleak for us, yet you are doing your best for the peace effort, and I—" Thace laughed bitterly as squeezed Shiro's shoulder before he stood. "I am marrying the man I love, and he... he would rather be here with you."

Shiro got up as well. "You really do love him." He paused, studying Thace's face. "You are kind. Loyal. That matters to Keith. Maybe in time—"

Thace sighed. He could have been the kindest, most loving person in the universe and still it would not matter to Keith, not now, maybe never. "He said that. He would have chosen me for alliance, had he not been in love with you. He would have chosen me, had his heart not been yours. So I am not without hope. In the actual event that he takes his heart back and has it in him to offer it to someone else, I hope it will be me. There is suffering to live through for the both of us, Shiro."

"Isn't there." Shiro all but rolled his eyes. "At least the one I got is better looking than the other commanders. Small favors. I guess we'll learn to appreciate them. At least we, Sendak and I, can always bond over our missing limbs," he added angrily. 

"Yes. Sendak is—" Thace paused. "We all knew him, those of us who were undercover for the Blade near Zarkon's inner circle. I wish I could tell you anything better than he is a dutiful, faithful, and honorable soldier; if he has made a promise or vow, he will keep it, and he will kill for it, if necessary. Other than that—" Thace shook his head. "He's beyond cruel if you stand in his way. But you knew that already."

There was little to say about Sendak apart from that, anything positive, that was. An epitome of a Galra soldier, Sendak was military through and through. Maybe that gave the alliance between the two, the champion of the Coalition and the commander of the Galra a minimal chance of not being a full-on disaster. Shiro, despite being a gentle, kind person, was military too, in some ways similar to Sendak, if that comparison could be made without offending Shiro deeply. So Thace cleverly held his tongue.

Knowing he had done his best to convince Shiro to take back his offer of marriage, Thace felt that he somehow had gotten Shiro's blessing. He left the room without a word, walking back to his own chambers, to Keith.

To accept his offer of marriage.


	7. Chapter 7

"Hey, handsome." Lance stretched next to Kolivan, relaxed after a long, slow morning fuck. Sore but content, Lance leaned in to kiss Kolivan's stern face. He grinned broadly and winked at his lover. "Here _I_ am. What were you two other wishes?" he said, chuckling as Kolivan made a content purr, dragging him closer by the arm. Kolivan smelled of sweat and sex, and Lance returned the purr with a happy sigh of his own. Letting Kolivan do all the mating stuff with him had its benefits, even if Kolivan's reputation was forever ruined, as far as Lance understood it. 

Kolivan looked at him, eyebrow raised in confusion. "I do not know what you mean. I had only _one_ wish. Why would I have a need for more mates? Are you in any way prevented from performing your duties as my mate? I wish for no one but you; I made that very clear to you at the courting assembly."

Lance sighed again, the sigh followed by another wide smile. Lance couldn't remember the last time he had felt so happy. Kolivan was strangely adorable for a Galra; Lance was sure that no other purple space cat was anywhere near this cute, he would bet his lion on it. "You're hopeless," Lance exclaimed, making himself comfortable against Kolivan's broad chest. "You see, there is this tale about a guy, getting a lamp… or maybe he's stealing it? Yeah, he's a thief. The lamp has a genie in it, and it comes out when you polish it. Polish the lamp, obviously, not the genie. Anyway, the genie grants him three wishes, anything he wants. So one wish…" Lance pointed at himself. "First. Wish. Dude, you _do_ get it, right?" 

Kolivan still looked as if he understood all of absolutely nothing.

"What kind of species is a… a genie?" Kolivan asked, frowning. "And how can it be inside a lamp? I already have you, so I do not need to wish for anything. You are right here."

"It's a story, Koli-baby. There's fiction, and there is real life. I mean, I'm pretty real. And pretty." Lance rolled on his stomach, chin on his hands. Kolivan was cute, if somewhat clueless for superspy. "Besides, the entire lamp thing shouldn't be so confusing: you have a magical sword that grows when you touch it," he grinned. "Not the one that grows when _i_ touch it, in case you were in doubt. So technically, you probably could have a genie in a lamp, providing genies were real. Anyway, they're sorta incorporeal, and… I mentioned not real, right?"

"I am not a baby," Kolivan huffed. "So, a human myth. I see." Kolivan's face was blank, not a trace of a smile. "I understand the joke." 

Lance laughed and squirmed a little to get more of himself in direct contact with more of Kolivan. "Well, it's more like a fairytale, and I'll probably have to stop with the pick-up lines, not that they ever worked very well anyway. But man, you are so clueless."

Kolivan looked confused. Again. "Are they not a part of human courtship? The… pickup lines?" There was this deep wrinkle between his brows now, and Lance would like to kiss it away.

"Hey, wait a sec." Lance shuffled closer in a rustle of sheets, placing his arm so that he was leaning on Kolivan's naked chest. "Let's rewind some. You said _more mates_? Can you do that?"

"What do you mean? Do you wish for me to partake in your human courting or not? I am not well-versed in these matters, you know that I—"

"No, silly. Have more mates? Can you have more than one mate? Is that a Galra thing?" Lance was not pleased with that idea. He might not have been too observant before, berating himself for not having seen Kolivan as a potential boyfriend (or mate, in their case) until he had been made to see, but now that his eyes were open, he had no intentions giving up on what he had. His. Fucking _his_. "Not that you can have any more. You are mine now." Lance said it with all the confidence he could muster. He sent Kolivan a mock glare. "Don't even think about it!"

"Yes. No." Kolivan laughed. "You make me—"

"Yeah?" Lance shuffled even closer. "What?"

Kolivan shook his head. "I do not know. But I am content. Confused. Happy. I am convinced that I need nothing in the world but you."

"So no more husbands?" Lance wanted to be one hundred percent sure. He was not letting anyone in on this; Kolivan belonged to him, and so what if he was a little possessive?

Kolivan looked more serious. "Yes. No. I have no need of more spouses. It was a Galra tradition in the time of war. To secure an heir to one's estate. But war is over and a Galra does not violate his marriage bond. But I am not merely Galra: I am Kolivan, and I do not wish for anyone but you. I want you, Lance, _only_ you, and now I have you."

Lance made another content sigh. "As if I'd let you have anyone but me, Baby. I'll tire you out before you know it, and you wouldn't have time for all those other hot dudes. Besides this—" He squeezed Kolivan's dick— "belongs to me. Mine. I don't share. Ever."

Kolivan hissed and closed his eyes. "I am still not a baby," Kolivan argued as he opened them again, in between one moan and the next. "I will have you know that I am many deca-phoebs older than you."

Lance rolled over on his back, laughing, pleased with the effect he had on his fiancé. "You are _so_ innocent, Koli. It's almost a shame to marry you and ruin it."

"Do you regret it? Agreeing to marry me, I mean." Kolivan's voice had a tinge of insecurity and Lance found it so endearing that he had to kiss him again, kiss him until they were out of air and far too into continuing their lazy morning in bed with more than kisses. "It is a little too late to stop the mating," Kolivan managed in between one kiss and the next.

"Are you crazy?" Lance exclaimed breathlessly. "Of course I don't regret it. You're hot enough to deserve someone as hot as me." Lance wiggled his ass and stretched to give Kolivan as much of a view that he could. "Nah, you're just what I needed, and I didn't even know, not the way I do now. You better get used to me because," Lance smiled, his smile turning into a grin. "I'm never gonna give you up, never gonna let you do-own," he hummed, remembering an old song his mom used to play. He poked Kolivan in the side. "I really, really like you, babe, but you need to get out of my bed."

"You are not very respectful to the Galra who wants to take you as his husband," Kolivan growled and bent down to nip at Lance's neck, probably leaving some more marks there.

Lance made a content sound, but didn't budge. He poked Kolivan again. "Get up and get dressed, because the ceremony is tomorrow, and I need the bathroom for my morning routine, and after that I need it for my pre-wedding routine. It's a tradition for humans… you can't see your fiancé until the day you marry. So you are not allowed to look at this picture of perfection until we attend the ceremony." Lance looked up and smiled, pursing his lips. "It's not as much of a routine when it's the only time in my life I marry, now that I think of it. But I need to look good on my wedding day. You see, I am marrying this gorgeous Galra guy tomorrow. He's part ninja hero, part big fluffy cat with fangs. Plus, he has this magic sword and he fights like a whip. So get the quiznak out of here before he comes back and kicks the shit out of you."

Kolivan purred loudly, sounding far too happy about his choice of partner. He got up on one elbow, pulling Lance back into his embrace. "Tell me his name so I can dispose of him. I am not giving you up to anyone, even if I have to fight him for you."

"Good thing you won't have to, then," Lance teased and squirmed his way out of Kolivan's grip. "One more day, Kolivan, and I'm yours in the eyes of Earth law. And more importantly: you are mine."

It was with a pout and a sigh that Lance saw Kolivan leave. _I'll have him to myself for the rest of my life_ , he whispered at the closed door, like the entire idea of feeling something so deep as what he felt for Kolivan, even after a few days together, was precious. Kolivan was his own small… large… _huge_ treasure. Lance sank back in the bed for a few minutes. He was so happy! It made him feel a little bad; neither Shiro, nor Keith were happy. Lance had never thought very deep thoughts about love, life, and the meaning of it, but he was damned sure that Shiro and Keith were meant to be together. The looks they had sent each other… Lance huffed. Man, if Shiro had looked at him like that while they were out there in space, fighting, he'd be married to Shiro, and not engaged to Kolivan. Not that he'd swap now, nu-uh. It was Koli or nothing. There was no one for him now but his personal alien space ninja.

For a moment, Lance's thoughts strayed and turned back to Shiro. Clearly, Shiro had saved them again. Who the hell in their right mind would want _Sendak_? Lance shuddered. _Yuck_! Kolivan's stern face was, at a glance, exactly as strict and cruel as Lotor's stupid ass general. But Kolivan was soft as butter, while Sendak… Rocks melted under the glare of his icky robot eye, Lance was sure. Yeah, he was happy he wasn't the one who'd taking one for the team.

Poor Shiro.

Lance buried his face in the pillows, Kolivan's scent lingering there. Wrapping his arm around the biggest pillow, wishing with all three imaginary wishes in one go that Kolivan was here, Lance wondered if there was anything he could do. Other than annoy Keith at every opportune moment, but that was getting a little old anyway. A spa day? Nah. Maybe he could ask Hunk to bake something? Not that it'd help either, but it wouldn't hurt.

He rolled onto his back, pillow in his arms, and sighed again. This was so outside his level of… everything. Shiro had to marry the purple menace, and Keith… 

Lance didn't know where he was, but probably curled up somewhere with his knife and his anger and his stupid mullet, hoping that Sendak would drop dead before dawn, not that wishing for his death had helped them any before. So tomorrow they'd be walking down the aisle, Sendak and Shiro, Kolivan and he, for the human marriage ceremony. There was a Galra one too, the one that Kolivan and he had already had a taste of, enough to consider them mates in the eyes of the Galra. They'd repeat the Galra rite properly later, after the wedding, when they were alone again. Lance felt a little guilty that they, he and Kolivan, had cheated and jumped ahead, but on the other hand he couldn't be bothered to be bothered. He was so happy.

Lance shuffled to the edge of the bed, wincing as he got up, sore still after having Kolivan's dick so deep in his ass that he could have sucked him off too, had he wanted that. Lance wrinkled his nose as a few drops of semen or oil ran down his thigh, but he forgot the discomfort as he stood, instead feeling happiness poke at the butterflies in his stomach. He eyed the small wooden box that Kolivan had placed on his desk. He opened it carefully, making sure his hands weren't damp or dirty. The fabric was soft and smooth as he reached into it, touching the tunic he'd be wearing tomorrow, adhering to Galra tradition. The tunic was blue like the ocean, shiny as the sea on a sunny day. He'd look good in it. He smiled, his eyes first, his lips following, curling at the corners. Kolivan had a tunic too, one that Lance hadn't seen. All he knew was that it was dark red. He could not wait to see Kolivan in it. And after that, he could not wait to see him out of it.

Lance couldn't remember having ever wanted anything as bad as he wanted Kolivan, except maybe seeing the end of the war.

***

"Where have you been? You swore to never leave me!" Keith was up, dressed and angry, arms crossed over his chest as Thace returned to Keith's room. "And you broke—"

"I went to speak with Shiro," Thace interrupted. He saw no reason to keep that part from Keith and he did not want to argue about him leaving, although Keith was right: he had left him, but for a good reason. "I wanted to persuade him to refuse Sendak's proposal."

Keith opened his mouth then closed it again. His eyes flashed with fear and anger both. His shoulders fell and he hang his head, defeated. "I know what he said. I _know_ him."

There was little to say about that. Few knew Shiro as Keith did, yet anbody who knew Shiro just a little would agree that Shiro took his promises seriously. He had promised himself to Sendak and there had never really been a chance that Shiro would call it off, yet Thace had to try. What would his love have been worth, had he not made an attempt? What would his broken heart be worth, had he not tried to mend Keith's? What if there had been the tiniest chance that he could? He could not have lived with it, knowing that he did not try.

"You _left_ me," Keith said again, his voice a void of deep longing and pain. "After you swore to me that you never would. Or is it that you have regrets? You don't want me either, is that it?"

"No, Keith. I want no one like I want you. I _want_ you." Thace refused to be pulled down by the undertow of anger. "And you want Shiro. If I could convince him—" Thace held up a hand, then let it fall, his conviction with it. "I should have stayed with you. I knew already what his answer would be." He bent his head before he looked up at Keith, trying to hide the pain, a pain that was for all of them, for all of their destinies, even Sendak's. "I want you to think this through. Is it not enough that Shiro marries for peace? I will stay with you as I promised, but you—" He looked up, eyes burning with pain and tears. "I want you more than anything. But what if you can be happy with someone else? You do not love me. Maybe you can love someone else?"

Keith merely glared at him, hands curled into tight fists. "Marry me."

"Keith—" Thace held out his hand, begging Keith to be sensible, to not do something he would regret, and yet, he wanted nothing more than that. Thace wanted to give Keith space and time to let life go on at his own pace. Had Thace been more callous, he could have been happy. He finally had the human he had longed for, yet it was a cold comfort. Thace had no illusions. He had been undercover in Zarkon's fleet for longer than he cared to think about, and nothing, not even his love and desire for Keith would make him break. Or so he thought.

He sank down to sit, head hanging. With little hope left, he let his heart bleed for Keith, for his own homeless love, for the love that Keith had lost. Thace tried to keep his pain hidden. he had sworn to protect Keith, and he would do so with his last breath, his last heartbeat. His pain was raw, but he kept the mask on, the one he had hid behind at Zarkon's court. He raised his eyes to look at Keith.

Keith stared at him, unflinching in his determination. "I said I want it done before _he_ marries."

"I heard you." Thace nodded slowly, knowing that there would be no arguing. Keith had decided. The room was closing in on him, the confines of it too restricting for his emotions. "It's Sunday in less than twenty four vargas. What do you suggest?"

"Commander Iverson can do it. I heard that he's an ordained marriage commissioner. We go to the Garrison, ask nicely, and boom. Done." Keith's voice was matter-of-factly, calm.

Thace closed his eyes. This was not how he had imagined courting Keith, nor was it how he had planned for his marriage to commence during the few instances when he had indulged in such fantasies. Nothing was these days. When he opened this eyes again, Keith was right in front of him, too close, or not close enough. Thace gave in. When he reached out this time, it was for Keith. He took him in his arms, his small body thinner than it should be. The ribs created little ridges that Thace's fingers fell into. Their embrace was bittersweet and heartbroken, Keith like a dying bird in his hands, malnourished and weak from lack of love. Thace made a sound that matched, his own emaciated feelings fighting for their life. The warmth of Keith's cheek soaked into Thace's chest, and he leaned down, pressing a kiss to the top of Keith's head.

"When the time is right," Keith said quietly, strangely vulnerable and uncharacteristically open, his words muffled by Thace's jacket, "when the time is right, you court me, a proper Galra courting, and I'll say yes, and we'll get married again, you know, invite people and—"

"Thank you," Thace whispered, stroking Keith's cheek gently, trying to convey with the touch what he felt by hearing that. It filled his heart with hope. "I wish that this had nev—"

"No." Keith put his fingers on Thace's mouth. "Don't say it. I want to look forward, not back." He almost melted into Thace's embrace again as he tightened his arms around Keith. "I want to be with you, Thace. I really do. When I cannot have— I want _you_."

There was such honesty in Keith's words. Thace didn't doubt them. It was the events that drove him to say them that Thace didn't like. Yet there was nothing he could do other than to let Keith grieve and move on the way that he needed to grieve and move on. Thace had promised Shiro to be there to catch Keith, and he would. "I'm pleased," Thace said, acknowledging Keith's admission, forcing himself not to ask again if Keith was sure that wanted to marry in such a hurry. Thace did not think that it would be taken kindly. "I am honored."

Keith hummed, almost a purr, wrapping his arms around Thace's waist. "I'm glad it was you."

No explanation was needed. They had spoken enough about the circumstances, and Thace wasn't adverse to follow Keith's lead; he too would look ahead, not back. Shiro was out of the picture, and they both knew it. All three of them, because Thace was sure Shiro knew that Keith was lost to him by now.


	8. Chapter 8

Coran looked guilty. His eyes shifted and he was fiddling a lot more with his mustache than usual. He carried a tray with refreshments: Shiro eyed a bottle of his favorite soda, a cup of hazelnut coffee and some of Hunk's cookies. The mere sight of the tray alone was enough to hurl Shiro into a sugar rush. 

He accepted the peace offer gracefully. He was tired and he could sure use the energy. "Who's next?" he asked, entirely out of touch with the program—the program that would go on for another day and culminate in his very public wedding to Commander Sendak tomorrow. 

"You have a reporter from Universal News Network who wants your entire love story for their Saturday Night News, and in fifteen minutes there's a Galra ambassador who wants to offer her congratulations on your marriage. I am convinced, however, that Ambassador Lorka merely wants a better seat at the ceremony, which I, as your wedding planner, am not going to give her. She is a very..." Coran's expression said it all. The ambassador would watch the ceremony from a seat at the far end of the hall, one behind a pillar to take any remaining view of the actual ritual.

Shiro sighed and hid his head in his hands. He sat there until he realized that he was leaning his forehead against his druid hand, and he slammed it down on the desk, annoyed with it and with everything else remotely connected to the Galra Empire, Keith being the only good thing that had ever come out of the universe's encounter with them. 

"It's the only reason he wants this, isn't it?" Shiro asked, staring at Coran. His face contracted into a grimace of anger."Sendak. It's all I am—an experiment, a nice specimen to heighten his status within the Council. _The Champion_ ," he sneered, disgusted with himself and the addition that had once been forced upon him.

Coran placed the tray on the desk. "I do not know more than you do about Commander Sendak's reasons. I know it's not ideal—if by 'ideal' you mean 'remotely acceptable'. Yet I cannot but think that it could be worse."

Shiro huffed. "True. It's really bad when you look at it like that: that Sendak is the better option."

Coran nodded and put the cup in front of Shiro. He looked at it, then leaned forward to take in the aroma of freshly brewed coffee. It reminded him of happier times, calm mornings at the Garrison, the quiet before training, the mornings spent with Keith in quiet conversation before the other cadets got out of their beds. If only he'd had the courage then to tell Keith about his budding feelings, but he hadn't. He had thought that there was time enough. Then Kerberos happened. 

"Keith— is he—" Shiro inquired, unsure of what to ask. He decided on a neutral approach: "Have you seen him today?"

"Hm-mm." Coran nodded. He turned away, like he was refusing to elaborate.

"And?"

"He's—" Coran's shoulders rose and fell with the sigh. "Thace is taking care of him like he promised." He turned and there was pity in the way he looked at Shiro.

"No," Shiro said. "Don't. Don't pity me. This is my own doing. Don't make it worse." He couldn't deal with it if there was pity. He had given up any claim, any right to Keith; any right to inquire about his health, his life, his happiness. Regret and despair teamed up, clawing at his heart, making him force down the tears that were brimming at the corners of his eyes.

Coran nodded, his expression soft and sad, as if he was aware of the pain Shiro had caused himself. Coran sighed again before he strode out, leaving Shiro alone with his dark thoughts and the fire-red pain of losing Keith.

Shiro allowed himself to sink into it, feeling sorry for himself although he hadn't deserved it, foolish as he'd been. It was true what Sendak had once told him: he was broken, ruined, and he would never be whole again. He had been a coward, had continued being a coward, too afraid to die, too broken to love, too slow and too fast, too human, and bitterly, too alien. Now he was but a sacrifice on the bloody altar of war, a final one, one to seal the bond and turn armistice into a lasting peace between the Galra and the Coalition. His feelings didn't matter, only Keith's, and he had forfeited any right to care about them. 

If only Thace did right by Keith, Shiro could bear the burden of guilt and failure. If only Thace made Keith happy, Shiro could live with what he'd done in the name of peace. If only being married to Commander Sendak was punishment enough. It was a lifetime, tied to his enemy. Maybe if his marriage was hellish enough he could forgive himself. No matter what, he was pretty sure he would be the last to do so.

Shiro hadn't kept an eye on time. It had disappeared without him noticing, and so had the cup of coffee and one of the cookies, both devoured without him registering it. Somehow he wished that the clocks would stop working, leaving him caught in a moment where there was nothing to worry about but a cup of coffee and some already-eaten cookies. It wouldn't do. He had a war to fight, a peace to win, and ambassadors and journalists to deal with.

One of which was knocking at the closed door. The sound made Shiro look up with a slight gasp.

"I hate my life," Shiro whispered with dread, and called out an "Enter!" to tell the guests to let themselves in, whoever the hell they were. Shiro did not have it in him to care about politeness. He was fresh out of it for today, war or no war.

The guest was a surprise. It was a Galra, but certainly not one he had expected.

"Commander Sendak?" Shiro did not mean to be so formal; it was the surprise that got him up from his chair, slightly disheveled and more than a little distressed. He still did not feel safe in the company of the Galra commander, even after five years of being on the same side as him. 

Towering and intimidating, the enemy personified, Sendak walked across the room, arrogant and confident, to take the chair across the desk without asking. "I disposed of the journalist and the ambassador. I wished to see you before tomorrow's wedding." His tall and broad shape was almost too big to fit into the chair, even though it was a Galra one.

Shiro forced himself not to step back. Instead leaned forward, his Galra hand on the table, fist closed, fingers flexing. He was losing his grip on himself, done with everything related to this… arrangement. "Isn't it enough for you that you will have me tomorrow? You couldn't wait?" Shiro felt anger rise like a fire nourished by the most flammable of materials: guilt. "You got your prize, and you can't even let me have this, a moment's peace until I have to give myself to you. I'll be your prisoner for the rest of my life." Shiro let out a stuttering breath, tears finally coming, desperation driving him towards the limit of what he could endure. He had reached the point where he did not give a damn about anything but to let it all out. He glared at Sendak, his face a blurry mess through the tears. "I gave up _everything_ to let you have me, to let the world have _peace_! I gave up the love of my life for this and you can't—"

"Quiet." Sendak stood again, taking a few steps toward Shiro. "You did not give yourself up to me. You gave yourself up to _anyone_. Anyone who'd have you. I was merely the one who stepped up to take the offer. Do I need to remind you of the line of Galra soldiers who would have grabbed you for petty revenge? And that love of your life, the small Galra? He could have asked for you before Prince Lotor had even spoken to me, like you could have asked for him. He isn't much, but he _is_ Galra. But I guess your side didn't think he was enough." Sendak stared down at Shiro, face contracted in an arrogant mask. "I advise you to forget about him."

Shiro fell apart, yet kept standing. He could not allow Sendak to find more chinks in his armor, now that he had broken down in front of the man he most hated. Despite having admitted his love for Keith at their first meeting, Shiro could not stop himself from denying it. "Don't be ridiculous. Keith is a friend, nothing more."

"From tomorrow he is nothing but a friend. Today he is the love you lost, and I will not stop you from mourning him. You mean nothing but alliance to me, yet as your husband, I swear to protect you and to keep you from harm. I see no problem extending that promise into today, so that is what I shall do. We both know what it means to enter into this alliance, and it means only that I am courteous to the man who will become my mate and husband, that is all. I came here to speak with you since imagined that if your day has been as busy as mine, you would not mind a pause. Thus, I sent the journalists away with a short, exclusive interview with the Commander of the Emperor's fleet. A scoop, I'm sure. _Read all about it! Commander Sendak's upcoming marriage to the famous Shiro, hero and Champion of the Arena and of the People. Commander Sendak reveals all about their affair and about the love that bloomed between them!_. I gave the ambassador a seat by our table at the wedding reception, thus securing us an ally for the foreseeable future. She saw no reason to stay after that brief conversation." 

The air went out of Shiro. He stared at Sendak, a Galra he despised, someone he thought hated and despised him in return. "I don't understand. Why would you—why would you do that? You owe me nothing." 

"Nothing but the consideration that mates owe one another. As I explained to you earlier, I have no intentions of making this any harder than it has to be."

Shiro frowned, trying to connect the concept of care and consideration with the person standing across the room. It was not an easy task. He had never met Sendak outside official events, and only rarely. Like any commander of an army worth their salt, Sendak probably had other things to do than to hang out with friends, sipping Champagne at the embassy. That aside, little had changed since the war about the way that Shiro looked at Sendak.

"But—"

Sendak got back to the chair and sat down. He eyed the leftover cookies. "Hunk's creations? Mmm." 

Shiro was too surprised to say anything. He nodded.

"Good. Your yellow friend makes interesting food. I like him." Sendak took a cookie. it was chocolate. He bit off a piece, clearly enjoying the taste of it, judging from his expression as he chewed on it.

Shiro wasn't sure which way the world turned, but he had not counted on it being in a direction where Commander Sendak ate cookies, praised a Paladin, and saved Shiro's own sorry ass from the press. "This is—"

"I know. Highly disturbing. To me as well. However, you will be my husband and I will be civil. I expect the same from you. Which brings me to another thing I wished to discuss with you before we say our vows: I swore to you that I would make our marriage as pleasant as possible. But I have one condition, one—" Sendak paused, looking like the sentence tasted bitter. "A plea. I ask of you that you remain faithful to me. Your little Galra—" Sendak shook his head. "It is not customary to violate a marriage bond, and I expect you to honor it, as will I."

"He— I—" Shiro did not know what to say. "I hadn't planned to—"

"You hadn't thought as far, you mean? Yet." Sendak's nose wrinkled like he had smelled something bad, rotten. "A marriage without sex, a bond without love. Contrary to you, I did think it though, knowing what the mating bond means to a Galra." Sendak studied the cookie. "Some say that food is better than sex. I am not sure whether it makes for some quiznaking good food or, with Hunk as the chef, for quiznaking good sex. Not with Hunk, clearly, although he is very attractive. For a human. That aside, we will only have to be in contact for public occasions. To satisfy the curiosity of the press; that is the entire purpose of this charade. And of course we must endure the… bodily contact that is required to close the bond. To the public, we are a couple in love, enemies finally finding each other when the universe settled for peace. At home… we are… separate. We will both respect the privacy of the other." Sendak made a sound as if he was throwing up in his mouth a little. Or perhaps it was indigestion. Maybe chocolate didn't go well with Galra peristaltics?

Shiro had a hundred questions milling around in his mind. _Why are you doing this for me, making it easy? Why do you not trust me to be faithful? How did we end up here? Why are we talking about this? Why are you not trying to kill me? Why are you even here?_

It was the last question that turned into words, sound. "Why did you come?" Shiro sat heavily in the chair, defeated, his life laid out before him, devoid of hope and love. "I know you promised me that we'd live separately, yet—yet you felt compelled to rub my nose in it?"

Sendak looked taken aback. "I will _not_ rub your nose. It is disgusting."

The absurdity made Shiro choose between laughing or crying. So he laughed. It made Sendak look like a grumpy cat with a stomach ache. He stared at Shiro in silence long enough for Shiro to be able to compose himself. "I apologize," Shiro managed. "It might be the pressure... and, erm, I did not want you to rub my nose for real; it's a human phrase, meaning that you, that you came to gloat. That you wanted to humiliate me."

Sendak looked just as serious. "I accept the apology. I did not come to... rub noses. I wished for us to have our expectations... aligned. I saw your affinity for the small Galra. I merely wanted you to know that Galra do not accept unfaithful spouses. You make a vow, you honor it. Honor and duty must come before anything."

Again Shiro shut his eyes, wondering how he had brought himself in this absurd situation. Did he really suffer from a hero complex, or was he just self-sabotaging? "I had not thought as far. About cheating. Or even… sex. The war… it—" Shiro couldn't remember the last time he jerked off, or even when he had the urge to be with another human being. Or Galra being for that matter, other than Keith. Now he would stay a fantasy, nothing more. "War is…"

"Yes." Sendak's voice was softer now, like he knew what Shiro meant. "Detrimental to the softer sides of life. And yet you wanted—"

"He's with Thace now," Shiro interrupted. "I gave him up for peace, and I asked Thace to take care of him. Thace came to me this night, or early morning to be precise, begging me to go back on my promise to you. I refused. So instead of me, Keith asked Thace for... for alliance. Keith is marrying someone else. I don't think he will ever forgive me for abandoning him like that. He—I— we saved each other so many times, made so many promises, and I broke them all."

"I am not particularly interested in your unsavory violation of your vows to another human, but let us say for the sake of peace throughout the universe as well as within our marriage that I am interested, I still expect you to keep to the promise you make to me and not cast shame upon me or our bond. I imagine that Thace of Marmora has similar views; as much as I loathe to admit it, he is still Galra, a former Galra commander, brought up in the tradition, so he will probably want the little Galra to stay faithful to him as well. We do not share well. And by 'well', I mean 'at all'."

"I don't think—" Shiro started, the paused. Did he really want to go through life without ever having sex again? It wouldn't really be a problem. It was the emotional connection that always did it for him, not that he held back when it came to one night stands when he was younger—he wasn't a monk. "I don't think I'd mind not having intercourse again, but I'll miss the rest… the tenderness and the emotional connection. I don't expect you to understand; you're Galra."

Sendak made a wry smile. "And so is your little friend. The Red Paladin. Now that I think of it, did you know why I had that particular lion on my ship?" Sendak looked smug. "When Emperor Zarkon piloted the Black Lion, King Alfor was his right hand man. With no Alfor, and with another strong warrior at Emperor Zarkon's disposal, who did you think was supposed to pilot that particular lion? Red was mine. Until your Keith took it from me. A lot of fire and passion there, in that small Galra. Certainly no lack of emotion. Why would you think that he would be any different from the rest of us, or that we would be different from him?"

"So you decided that it was a great idea to marry me? So you could take me from Keith, get revenge for the Red Lion being taken from your ship? Is that it?" Shiro laughed, all the bitterness coming out one way or another. "The only passion you seem to have is to hurt others."

"That is not what I meant. I am trying to tell you that I, too, forsake the benefits I could have enjoyed within the mating bond. That I am not as cold as you seem to believe. I would not have piloted the red lion had I not been like her, and to her liking. Passionate."

"You didn't pilot her, so don't fool yourself." Shiro was getting angry again. How dared Sendak compare himself to Keith! "You are nothing like him, or like Red. So what if you claim to have passion?. _You_ seem content, forsaking physical intimacy for the rest of your natural life. Which I suppose is vastly longer than mine."

"I would have flown her, bonded with her, had you and the other humans not prevented us from taking back the lions that were ours in the first place. And I am not forsaking anything. You clearly do not understand how the life of a commander under Zarkon was. There was no room for emotion, no leeway for intimacy or love." This time it was Sendak who sounded bitter. "Do you truly believe I did not think it through?"

"How would I even know? I still don't understand what you want with me in the first place."

"Peace, Shiro. My emperor asked it of me, and I am faithful to the Galra empire first and foremost. I am Prince Lotor's first in command. As I told you before, I stand by my emperor, despite his shortcomings and the hostility he has toward me. Our duel for the throne and the empire is not forgotten. But he wants for the Galra to live in peace, and after ten thousand years of war, so do I."

"Your emperor is no longer an emperor." The words were out before Shiro could stop them. He didn't mean to be confrontational. There was no reason to point out to the military leader of a fallen empire that they were now in alliance with the Coalition, under the rule of the Universal Council, and _prince_ but a title that Lotor held out of politeness. 

"That may be. To me, he is still the emperor, the leader of my nation and—"

"—and it is exactly that attitude that'll propel us into a second war. If you don't accept the Coalition Council as the highest universal authority, then why all this?" Shiro waved his hand between them. "Why even try? And don't give me the 'Emperor Lotor asked you' spiel. Why?" 

"You said it. Ten thousand years of fighting. Emperor Lotor _did_ ask. I would not have taken you, any other human, nor any member of the Coalition as my mate, not without his incentive. I am worn out, and I still have insurgents to fight, those who cannot, will not, bow to Emperor Lotor or the Coalition. And I am weary. In a thousand deca-phoebs or so, I'll be ready to fight another war, but now… I can only repeat what I said: Emperor Lotor wants peace, I want peace, and I came here because I want peace in my home as well. I do not want any misunderstandings. I am not bound to like you, nor to live with you, but I swear to you that there shall be peace in the house we share."

"Okay." Shiro didn't want any fighting either, at least they saw eye to eye on that. If that meant that he had to keep it in his pants, that'd be fine. It wasn't a quick fuck in a stall he'd miss. For intimacy, he'd have to rely on his friends. The _monster_ that sat across from him? It would not happen: Shiro would not let it happen, and Sendak clearly was of the same mind. "But just to make it clear: I'd have to ask you for—sex, if I wanted—"

"And perhaps I would oblige. I do not find you as disgusting as many humans."

"Thanks for the compliment, never felt more attractive in my life. Plus, I don't push myself onto an unwilling partner, so spare it."

"Attraction has nothing to do with it. You will be mine as I will be yours. I do not share. Agree to my terms, or refuse the alliance and suffer the consequences of the aborted peace treaty. That is all I am able to offer. It is a question of honor."

"Not mine."

"Yes, yours. My honor is your honor when we mate."

"Doesn't sound Medieval at all," Shiro huffed acidly. The only upside might be that he was done being shuffled around on the chess board when he married Sendak, if all the talk about honor and mates and ownership actually mattered to the Galra. No matter Shiro's opinion on his husband-to-be, Sendak made for a formidable enemy, and this time Sendak would be on his side, a remarkable change in itself, one he was sure he would be struggling to understand in years to come. He still had nightmares about his fight with Sendak. He would have to get over that. Right. If it was that easy. "Fine. You get what you want, I am your pet Champion, nothing new in my life."

Sendak got up. He frowned, looking nothing near pleased. "I do not understand what you mean. I fear there is a divide between us; you clearly do not understand how much a Galra mating means. You will _never_ be my pet. You will never be anyone's pet again. You will never have the druids experiment on you. You will never have to fight in the Arena. You will be my mate, elevated in status, equal, one to be cherished and honored. By me, and by my Galra peers. No one would dare harm the mate of Commander Sendak of the Galra Empire."

Shiro laughed in the face of arrogance. Sendak merely looked at him. Shiro sighed. "You will fight for me, and yet you don't want to live with me, nor do you want to have sex with me."

"No, I do not, just like you do not wish to be intimate with me. I have no intentions of doing anything dishonorable to you, and the sooner you understand that, the sooner we are able to figure out a way to let his pretend marriage work, both in public and at home. I offered you freedom. Whether you would live entirely separate from me, keeping only the necessary contact to make our marriage seem happy and harmonious… that is entirely up to you." 

"Didn't you tell me three days ago that you preferred living apart from me? I don't see where there's any choice for me here."

Sendak huffed. "You will be my mate." He walked towards the door, long, quick steps. He stopped, hand hovering over the keypad. "And I will be yours. Your wish is my command." With that, Sendak opened the door and strode out, his steps echoing in the hallway.

 _I'll be your mate._ Like that explained everything. 

Maybe it did.


	9. Chapter 9

Sunday morning arrived with blazing heat and a sun that showed no mercy, even at the early hours. The car rumbled down the road to the Galaxy Garrison, the dirt road full of potholes. For being the hub of intergalactic exploration in this quadrant the area was remarkably unremarkable.

Thace sat with Keith's hand in his, but Keith was far away. _With Shiro_ , Thace thought, not able to blame Keith for letting his thoughts wander. Thace felt more at peace with his offer and his decision; Shiro's refusal to stop his alliance with Sendak made it, if not easier, then not as hard, knowing that Keith did not have to choose between Shiro and him, but between getting married or not. Keith had chosen marriage. He had chosen Thace. It had to be enough. It had to. 

A deep pothole threw the car off course and made it bounce. Thace made a groan. If at least this was the only rocky road they'd encounter in their marriage, he'd be glad, but under the circumstances, he doubted it.

The bump returned Keith from his brooding. He squeezed Thace's fingers, his small hand very strong. It was how Keith was, Thace believed: fragile-looking, but strong. 

"It's fine, Thace," Keith said, like he'd read Thace's mind. "I want this. You."

Even if it was a lie, Thace wanted it, too, lie and all. He wanted the moment he had dreamed about, just a taste of how it would feel if it was real, if Keith really loved him. "Thank you." He forced a tense smile onto his lips. He looked away, unable to be neither happy, nor sad, not knowing which of the emotions he was feeling as one continuously raged against the other, both of them feeling wrong. 

They sat quietly, men awaiting execution, until they were past the security check. The chauffeur drove them all the way the administration wing. Thace looked at the car's clock. In time. They didn't speak as they got out of the car. They walked in silence across the yard, dirt and pebble creaking under their boots. The heat was intense. The Arizona sun was ruthless. 

Thace let out a strained gasp and sighed with relief as the entered the building, air condition humming its cool song. Keith made a huff, halfway a laughter, the sound almost grating against their somber mood. 

"Are you laughing at me?" Thace asked, hopeful. If at least Keith had that, a laugh. 

A challenging grin met him. "Of course not."

"I can still say no, you know." Thace regretted the comment immediately when he realized the impact it made, even if it was made in jest.

Keith stopped, pale, hand shaking as he reached for Thace. "You promised. You promised not to—" He gasped, a small animal in pain. "You promised me you wouldn't."

 _Quiznak_! Thace hurried to take Keith's hand again, pulling him into his arms. "I am sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I swore, and I will swear as many times as you want me to say it: I'll never leave you, Keith. Never. I will never—

Keith had his hands buried in Thace's fur, thin fingers holding on to him with an iron grip, like the mere action was enough to ground Thace on the spot. Keith's face was hidden at Thace's chest, warm fast puffs of anxious breathing damp through the fabric of his suit. 

"I'm marrying you, Keith, in five doboshes, if you'll just... please?" Thace stroked Keith's back, desperate to offer him comfort, wanting to ease the obvious pain. "I'm yours," he whispered over and over until Keith's breathing evened out, calmed. "In a tick you will be my husband, and that means something to a Galra."

Keith finally let go. His face was dry, but his eyes red-rimmed. "Sorry."

"No." Thace didn't need to explain. Keith merely nodded. He understood, Thace hoped. There would be more of these misunderstandings, more confusion, the two of them navigating a sea filled with sharp-toothed little pain-sharks, ready to tear into them at any opportune moment. There would be no shallow waters, no calm sea, not for some time."Ready?" Stroking Keith's cheek tenderly, offering a little tidbit of comfort before they went in. Thace squeezed Keith's hand. He was ready to get married, and so, clearly, was Keith, since he followed Thace to the main offices' entrance without struggling against this grip. 

***

Commander Iverson was expecting them. He sure was. "What's the rush, Cadet," he snapped at Keith. "Is there a fire somewhere?" Iverson's one eye was closed, but it blinked erratically, like the mere sight of Keith inflamed particularly violent tics. "And you—" he pointed at Thace. "What do you want with—"

Thace, keeper of peace, secret undercover agent, always able to keep himself in line and under control, growled in the face of Commander Iverson. Loudly, and with his fangs bared as a threat. _No one_ offended his husband. 

Commander Iverson took a step back. Thace was pleased with the progress. After what he'd heard, the commander didn't back down from anyone. 

That was before he learned, first hand, what would happen if he decided to come between a Galra and his intended. 

"Commander," Thace said, stepping back. "Please, speak respectfully to my fiancé. We have come here by our own accord to enter into a human bond, the marriage bond. Keith said you were a high priest—" 

"Marriage officiant," Keith interrupted. "And Commander Iverson is just permanently grumpy. Besides, marriage is not…. religious. It's a legal bond so that the authorities know that we are. Married, I mean."

Iverson looked perplexed from Keith to Thace and back again. He looked suspicious. "Are you sure you wish to continue, Kogane? You used to hang around Shiro. It wasn't as if you took his disappearance too well. I thought you'd grab the chance—"

Iverson could just as well have punched Keith in the face. Keith breathed in and Thace recognized the tension in his body, a raging animal ready to attack. "No." It was an order, short and clear, from a commander to his soldier, and Keith reacted immediately, Blade training setting in. He froze, mid-move, hand on the hilt of his blade. "Keith, please." Thace put a hand on Keith's back, waiting a tick before he slid his arm around his waist. "I am sure Commander Iverson did not mean anything by it." 

Turning to Commander Iverson, Thace attempted a friendlier attitude, not trying to hide anything. "Yes, Keith would have chosen Shiro. But Shiro, in turn, is going to marry Commander Sendak. As we all strive to fulfill the task that Princess Allura and Prince Lotor have given us, Keith has sought out alliance elsewhere, with me, Thace of the Marmora, former commander of Emperor Zarkon's fleet, current aide to Leader Kolivan of the Marmora."

"I know who you are, Thace of Marmora." Iverson looked a little less perplexed. "And you want to marry that... Keith?"

Thace closed his fingers around Keith's arm, a little too hard. "Yes, I wish to marry Paladin Keith of Marmora. Otherwise I would not be here. It is a task and a destiny I take upon me, not for duty and honor, but with pleasure."

Iverson shrugged. "At least you're big enough. He's a handful." His eye twitched.

"Paladin Keith is a warrior, savior of the Universe. He _should_ be a handful." Thace thought he heard Keith snigger behind him. An improvement. "Or he would not make much of a husband."

"There is that," Iverson admitted. "If you want to turn marriage into an extreme sport, that is. Paperwork?"

Thace pointed at Iverson's tablet, expressionless. "Sent to you."

"Well. Let's get to it then." Iverson typed on the screen. "Anything in particular you need to say, or do we cut to the important part?" 

Thace didn't think that Keith would mind cutting this short. "Keith?"

"Yeah. Let's get it done and over with." Keith shrugged.

"And they say romance is dead." Iverson sighed, then took the tablet and fiddled with it for some time. "Ah, here. Thace of Marmora, and Keith Kogane. Do you, Keith Kogane, take Thace of Marmora as your lawfully wedded husband?"

Thace barely had time to turn to Keith and take his hand before Iverson was done. Keith smiled, a tense and unhappy smile. Yet the reply came immediately and firmly. "I do." He made a small nod, the smile a bit more soft now. "Your turn," Keith whispered. "And you can't run from me."

"Never. I promised you I'd never leave you." Thace could not stop himself from feeling a little happy, like he wasn't allowed to do so, but did anyway. 

Iverson coughed lightly. "Do you, Thace of Marmora, take Keith Kogane as your lawfully wedded husband?"

Thace didn't hesitate either. He had done his best to convince Shiro to refuse Sendak. Keith had made his decision and so Thace was free of obligations, except for the promise he had given to Shiro: to take care of Keith. 

"I do," Thace said, finally without reservation. "Yes, I do."

"I hereby, by the power invested in me by the State of Arizona, pronounce you husband and husb—"

Thace didn't hear the last of Commander Iverson's words. For Keith grabbed him by the collar, forcing him to lean down so he could kiss him hard and wet. Keith was clinging to the collar of Thace's formerly uncreased uniform with remarkable strength. Thace complied, letting Keith take what he needed, giving it freely, hoping that one day it would be what Keith truly wanted. That _he_ would be what Keith really wanted.

Breaking the kiss, only to hear Iverson leave the room, Thace sighed. Happiness and sadness did not mix well, one destined to ruin the other, neither able to live in amiable cohabitation with the other. "You did it. You really did marry me." Thace's words were tinged with wonder. "You are my husband."

"I did, and I am, and you better get me back home and do something about it," Keith demanded. "I'm not going to disappoint you."

***

As it were, Keith did not disappoint, and Thace did his best to not disappoint, either. They had barely entered Keith's room before Thace had his arms full of him, hungry kisses and greedy touches overwhelming him. Keith knew what he wanted. Thace was not about to offend him by asking for the umpteenth time whether he was sure. Keith clearly was. Thace was on his back on the bed, Keith on top of him, pulling at his clothes, at both their clothes, desperate more than eager.

Thace let himself be undressed, helping Keith where he could, yet not taking the initiative. It had to be Keith's choice, even though Thace wanted to lead, wanted to _take_ , the inherent Galra aggression that he usually kept under lock welling up into him.

Keith's shirt suffered a quick death as Thace ripped it apart. He was appeased by the slight gasp that Keith made. The gasp was followed by an eager kiss which did more than appease. Thace's mind was filled with thoughts of _mate_ , the urge to mate the Galra way so strong that Thace let out a possessive growl, fangs bared against Keith's skin. 

Keith whined. "What is it you want? Thace, please?"

"Mate." Thace gasped out the word, afraid to open his mouth, as if he could not do it without closing it around the skin of Keith's neck. "I— I want to mate with you."

"Yeah, so?" Keith shoved the sad remains of his shirt off his shoulders. He still had one boot and one leg of his pants on. The lining of Thace's pants was cutting a line into the upper part of his thighs, his naked crotch covered by Keith's similarly naked ass. "Isn't that what you're doing?" He undulated his hips, for a few ticks rendering Thace unable to think at all. "Fucking your husband?"

"It's not—" Thace paused, letting out a very undignified whine as Keith ground down on him again. He grabbed Keith's hips, bony under his fingers, holding him still. "We are married in the eyes of humans, not of the Galra. I am married to you, and will always honor that vow, but some Galra will not see you as my mate." 

Keith frowned, huffed, and sighed. "So mating is… what?"

"A bond. The merging of body and spirit." Thace loosened the grip in favor of caressing Keith's chest.

"How?" Keith leaned against the touch, then reached out and tugged at Thace's ear, not very gentle. "What if we don't bond? So we won't be married in the eyes of the Galra?"

"I—" Thace didn't want to explain to Keith further implications of a mating. He wanted to touch and take. He knew he couldn't. Not without Keith's full consent. Keith could be released from a human marriage, but not from a Galra mating. "It is forever, Keith. Different from human marriage. It is unbreakable. Don't— I can't do that to you." 

"How?" Keith stared at him, steel eyes and a determination to match. " _How_ , Thace? I chose _you_. You promised me it would be forever, that you would never—" Keith's voice broke. He let out a shaky breath. "Is it because you don't trust me? It's obvious that you want the mating thing. If you meant it, that you are never leaving me, then we're doing this. Mating. Forever. Now. So _how_?"

Thace had fought too many battles as not to know defeat. Keith was right: if they were going to be husbands, they would have to trust each other. He had to believe in Keith, and believe, too, that Keith knew what he wanted. If Keith decided that a full Galra mating was what he needed, Thace could not in good conscience deny him that. He had sworn to let Keith deal with his sorrow in any way he saw fit, and if a mating was a part of it, Thace would agree to one, damned the consequences. 

"I do trust you— yet I do not want to tie you to me in a way that will not allow you to be free of me if you so wish." Thace said solemnly, arousal forgotten. "I cannot deny that I would like nothing more than to mate." He made a curt nod, looking down, then up at Keith. "So be it. There a ceremony to perform, but nothing that is detrimental to its validity. It is the sharing of blood that matters. There is a part of the ritual where I should welcome you to my house, but since this house belongs to the Altean people, I cannot do that." Thace shifted, making more room for Keith, his arm around his shoulder, fingers playing with his hair. "Blood is shared with a bite, that is the most common closing of the bond between mates. There is a small vow. I know I bit you already, playing at mating with you, but it is the intent that matters and you... you did not know at the time. Those are the basics, the way it has been done for Millennia." Thace smiled, sadness weighing on him heavily because the mating would mean that there would be no out for Keith. Ever. "I wish you would—"

"No!" Keith turned around, arm on Thace's chest. "Shut up. You are my husband, and I want you as my mate. I don't want an escape hatch, Thace. I want to commit, and I want to know that you will too. Shiro always stood by me, and I— I love him. Even now, I love him. I always will. But he chose world peace, and _I_ choose you. I choose to—" Keith poked a finger into Thace's chest. "—mate with you. If you want to help, give me that. You have seen what it does to me when people leave me. No arguing, I know what I'm doing."

"If only." Thace could not help but smile up at Keith, his eyes flashing, his hair falling in a mess around his face. "But I surrender." He raised his hands. "All yours."

"You bet you are," Keith snapped. "And that's what I want. So get to it."

Not very into sinking his fangs into Keith just like that, Thace knew he looked a bit disappointed to Keith, he could feel it in the tense lines of his face, in the heaviness of his limbs. 

Keith frowned. "Oh, I— I guess it's better if we—" He moved his hand downwards on Thace's chest, a little insecure. "If we fuck."

Thace nodded. He was strung out between wanting and rejecting, between triumph and defeat, between sadness and joy. Between being willing and unwilling. But it was Keith. Keith needed. The crude _fuck_ was not what Thace wanted, not deep down. He wanted to make love, but it was something he could not have and he knew it. "We do not need to— fuck. But pleasure makes for a stronger start, a tighter bond."

Keith nodded. "Okay."

Without over-thinking it again, Thace pulled Keith close, burying his nose in his hair, inhaling the scent of him. Keith moved up a little, close enough to brush his lips over the skin of Thace's neck, over his jaw, to his cheek, forcing him to look up. As he did, Keith's hungry mouth was on his, eager for a kiss.

Thace provided, as he suspected that he would do in the foreseeable future, letting his sadness evaporate in the warmth of Keith's mouth. Warmth grew more heated and Keith let out a sigh as Thace pulled him down on top of him, his hardening member rubbing against the slight erection that grew between Keith's legs. 

Thoughts became fleeing, turning to desire, desire to lust. Keith made a small mewl, his hand closing around Thace's growing cock. He made a sound that matched the one that Keith had made. He wanted. Oh, he wanted. But he had to keep a clear head, for both their sakes. "Keith?"

"Just, please! Where?" 

"Neck," Thace managed, pulling himself together. "If you want it visible. Otherwi—"

Thace stopped speaking, mid-sentence, as Keith tilted his head, baring his neck to him. That was answer enough. Thace pressed a light kiss to Keith's cheek before he put a finger under Keith's chin, forcing him to look up at him. Thace looked Keith in the eye. "I am honored that you are willing to take me as your mate. If you are ready?"

Keith snorted and snuggled closer. "You're going too slow, old man. Get to it." He made a smile, one that made it all the way through his sorrow, into his eyes. "Yes, Thace. Please."

There were many different kinds of sadness, Thace thought, and this one, tinged with hope, was one they shared. He nodded, taking upon him his destiny. He turned on his side, Keith with him, one arm around Keith's naked waist. Thace looked down on his husband, readying himself, trying not to think about anything but to fulfill Keith's wish. 

"With this bite I accept your flesh," he said, beginning the ritual. "With this blood I bind myself to you. With this oath I am yours, now and until the stars cease to be."

The smile on Keith's lips said it all: Keith wanted to belong to someone. The promise of forever sat well with him. Thace leaned down, kissing Keith's shoulder before he bit it, the spot where shoulder became neck. It was quick and hard, blood welling into Thace's mouth, only a few drops, the taste of iron lingering. He pulled back before Keith could even cry out.

"Ow," Keith groaned. "I think I like the human way better, at least nobody has to chew on me. I like the star bit, though."

"I want to stay with you until the stars cease," Thace said quietly. "Always, Keith."

The honest smile flickered again. "I'd like that." He paused, rubbing the mark, his fingers coming away, tainted with blood. "And that's it? Apart from this?" He rubbed himself against Thace's erection, like he was eager for it.

Thace leaned back into the pillows. "No." He brushed his fingers over his own neck. "Your turn."

"Oh, I—" He reached out, touching with a surprising gentleness the spot where Thace's fingers had just been. "Here?"

Thace nodded. "Where you want to put it." He longed for a visible mark, as if the mere sight of it could make Keith love him. "You say the vow, then make the bite."

Keith looked confused, like he was searching for something. "Erm—"

"With this bite I accept your flesh." Thace managed a small smile.

"Yeah." Keith pressed his lips together. "Got it. _With this bite I accept your flesh. With this blood I bind myself to you. With this oath I am yours, now and until the stars cease._ "

It was good enough, and Thace wished with all his heart that it had been said with love and not with the urgency of relief for a pain that would torment Keith for a long time. "I am ready." Thace could feel the bond already, newborn and weak, the soft humming of their connection. It was not very strong, perhaps because Keith wasn't full Galra?

"Now?" Keith squirmed a little, eyeing Thace's neck. 

"Please?" Again, Thace tilted his head, baring his neck invitingly, the humming in his veins turning into a flood of need for his mate. Keith did not hesitate, but let himself be encased in Thace's embrace, his arousal surging as he rubbed himself against Thace. Keith's opening was slick and loose and he bore down on Thace's cock the moment he bit him. Keith made a deep growl, the sound vibrating through his chest. The sound was a hum on Thace's skin, a song of desire and possessiveness. Their mating was complete, the bond closed and sealed with blood. 

The mess of arousal and sorrow, of love and longing was too much. Shutting it off, refusing to think, was the best option. Following Keith's lead, Thace thrust in, Keith riding him before he even started moving. Keith's thighs pressed against his sides, sweat already building, his naked skin slick under Thace's touch. Oh, he had wanted this for so long! Finally letting go, Thace _took_. Everything Keith offered him, he took that moment: his surrender, his body, his kisses. His love he could not have, perhaps never, but that instant Thace did not care. He let go, dizzy with need, his blood burning with the fire of mating, with the bond they had closed. 

With one arm around Keith's waist, Thace slammed inside, forcing a rhythm of forever-forever-forever into Keith's body, the hoarse cries enough to let Thace know that Keith truly liked it hard and fast. Letting the intense rapture of the complete bond wash his concerns away, Thace got up, dick deep in Keith, dumping him on his back in the bed, fucking him with all he had, even before Keith had recovered. 

"Thace, oh!" Keith arched up from the bed, fingers clutching at Thace's fur, face tense with need. "Yes—oh, please," he hissed, clenching around Thace, the pressure halting his speed until Keith found it in him to relax. Letting the sensations guide him, Thace went on, plunging into utter bliss as his orgasm took him, hand on Keith's cock, helping him along. 

Moans and kisses mixed, Thace continued moving. Keith's hoarse moans turned into little gasps that died out when Thace pulled out carefully, leaving a mess on the sheets. He moved away from the pool of come, happily opening his arms as Keith rolled over, a small shape against Thace's much broader chest. 

They didn't speak. Keith made a few grunts before he settled, almost asleep when Thace gave in to the emotional exhaustion and sleep took him.

***

Thace woke to the small sliver of light shining through the narrow slit between the bathroom door and the floor, the only light in the room, heavy curtains keeping out the afternoon sun. He rubbed his eyes and yawned, wincing as he stretched. Keith's mating bite had been deep. It was good. He looked at the clock. There was still time; there were hours until the wedding, one that would be Shiro and Commander Sendak's ceremony as well as Leader Kolivan and Lance's.

Thace turned in bed, reaching for Keith, but the spot next to him was empty.

It might have been the rustle of sheets that covered what silence revealed. Somebody was crying. Thace closed his eyes, as if it could help him remove the pain that was stabbing him in the gut at the sound of Keith's quiet sobs. 

He had to be strong for Keith, for the both of them. Keith was incredibly strong enough, more than strong enough, but he still hadn't learned that he did not have to carry his burdens alone. The thought made Thace laugh silently, chasing the impending tears away with a bitter, soundless grimace. Maybe he should take his own advice and not try to work through his pain alone. Only it would only serve to make Keith more miserable. Also it would Thace look like a... what did the humans call it? Yes, a jerk. He'd be a jerk if he told Keith what this did to him, and he did not want to be one. 

Ancients, he was a fool, but a willing one. He was so in love with Keith. Thace had never thought he would know the emotion, his Galra training quelling such useless feelings.

Lying in bed, Thace felt every tear Keith cried, every anguished sob he was crying for another man. It felt like his heart was being torn to pieces. For a few ticks, Thace allowed himself to sink into the feelings that was threatening to choke him. Despair, hopelessness, sorrow. Jealousy. He clenched the comforter so hard his claws broke through the fabric. Even though Thace wanted badly to be loved like Shiro was, he did not envy Shiro. Shiro had taken the hardest decision in his life and there was nothing envious about it.

Thace stared up into the ceiling, wondering whether he should go comfort Keith or not. Maybe Keith, like a dying animal, would prefer to tend to his wounds in solitude. Keith needed time to mourn. _You could say the same about yourself,_ Thace decided. He hadn't had time to think much about anything; he'd just acted, done what was necessary. He would do it all over again, for Keith. 

Letting his thoughts wander made it easier to give Keith some space. The alliances they had made... Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea, but it was not very well thought through. Thace understood the political value, the attention, the signal. It was no longer 'victory or death' or 'knowledge or death'. No, it was 'peace or death', and they were all willing to make sacrifices to make peace last. Shiro, Thace, Keith. Even Sendak. There was no love lost between them, but Thace had to admit that when Sendak committed, nobody or nothing could stand in his way, not if they knew what was good for them. Thace had known Sendak from the time they were very young. Sendak, like Thace, had been picked from the ranks of the military academy to advance. Sendak had always taken honor, duty, and fidelity to another level. If he was that dedicated to Shiro, maybe it wasn't entirely bad, being mated to one's worst nightmare. Apart from the nightmare part.

The bathroom had fallen quiet. Thace decided that enough was enough. He pushed the comforter aside, feet bare on the cold floor. He padded across it to the bathroom door, knocking on it gently. "Keith? Do you want to be left alone, or do you need me?"

There was no sound, not for many ticks. Then there was a rustle, the door sliding open. Almost before it had opened, Keith was out, fast as a whip, arms around Thace's neck, clinging to him like one of those small monkey animals Thace had seen in a human Zoological garden, face smushed into his chest, fingers deep in his fur. Slowly Thace raised his arms and closed them around Keith. "That was the answer to that, I believe," Thace whispered softly, encasing Keith in his arms. There were suddenly lips on his cheek, mouth wet and hungry. 

"I'm tired of crying over him," Keith let out, almost inaudibly. "When I have _you_. I have you now. You're mine," he added with more force, like it really mattered.

"I am yours. Like I promised you, I am yours. I'll always be yours," Thace murmured soothingly. "Come back to bed, Keith. Let me hold you. Let me comfort you." 

"I forced you." Keith looked up. "I begged you and you could not refuse, not when Shiro—" This time the name was not as much a stumbling block as it had been before. "When Shiro threw me into your arms."

Thace's mouth curled at the corners. It was all he had in him. "I did nothing I would not have done by my own accord." Stroking Keith's hair, Thace kissed his brow. "As long as we both want to be in this marriage, it'll end up being good for the both of us. I told you I can wait. You gave me your body; I have to believe your heart will follow."

"If it doesn't, I'll make it," Keith said, almost pouting, as if he was cross with his heart already. "I want to, Thace. For you. You could have died on that warship for me. I owe you my life."

"You owe me nothing. We have sacrificed so much, been near death too many times. I know Lotor once saved you from a brave attempt to save your friends, crashing your fighter into a Galra ship. That does not mean he owns you, or that you own your friends. When I tell you you are mine, it merely satisfies that part within me that wanted you for a long time. It does not mean I own you, or that you owe me anything other than what you give to me willingly."

"But you… I _made_ you." Keith frowned. Guilt did not become him. "One thing," Keith said. "If I could have one thing."

Thace knew what it was. "I know. Yet it is no burden to me that I belong to you. I will never leave you, Keith. Never."


	10. Chapter 10

The small room was little more than a glorified walk-in closet, but it provided Shiro with a place to relax, to get himself under control before he stepped into the cathedral. With Hunk there, the room felt even smaller, the two of them standing close, the door ajar to let in a little air. The low murmur of voices and the loud, excited bi-bi-bih-bi-bo-bih of one of the journalists covering the event were barely registering. Shiro had enough on his mind to notice anything much anyway.

"Are you sure you wanna—I mean, I don't wanna offend Sendak or anything, but you know, he, I—" Hunk made a small, frustrated noise as he navigated around a gigantic bouquet of flowers that Coran for some reason or other had placed in the room. "You don't have to marry him, do you?"

"Stop babbling, Hunk." Shiro reached for him, and for once _he_ was the instigator of one of the famed Hunk hugs. Squeezing Hunk hard, searching for a comfort that was both too cold and too late, Shiro let go of his pent-up feelings. "Yes. I do. I have to. It'll mean the greatest offense to the Galra if I refuse him. It's just not an option." It hurt Shiro to bring it up, but he did anyway: "Keith always said that we could not value the life of a few people over the lives of many. That is how it is. We're soldiers. I am a soldier. I'm valuing the lives of many, the peace we finally won, over the lives of— my own life."

"And, erm, I don't know—Keith?" Hunk looked down, then away. "He—you."

"Is there anyone who hasn't seen it? That I was… am—" Shiro looked away too, as if looking Hunk in the eye was too much. "That I'm in love with him." 

Hunk was surprising clear. "No. We all thought— perhaps—"

"I know what I did," Shiro admitted, part lie, part truth. "I regret it, but it's too late."

"It's not. I could— if Sendak only takes you because he wants a Paladin I could—" Hunk looked sick. "Instead of you. Not that he'd want me. At—at least I—I don't think so. Even if he spoke to me, like… a normal person. I could try? I don't mind, the—"

This time Shiro hugged Hunk for gratefulness, for the knowledge that he had friends, real friends who'd sacrifice themselves for him. He knew that, of course, after all they had been through together. He fought a war with them. But sometimes those kind of bonds did not necessarily migrate well into more peaceful times. Yet Hunk, the guy who'd probably live in his own hell with someone like Sendak, offered to take on the burden of alliance so that Shiro could walk free, free to be with Keith if Sendak agreed to it. 

If only it hadn't been too late. There was no way that Sendak would release Shiro from his promise, and even if there had been a way, Keith had made his choice. He had chosen Thace. 

"I appreciate it," Shiro said softly as he let go of Hunk. "But if anyone can handle Sendak out of the five of us, it's me. I spoke with him yesterday. He swore on some Galra honor code that he is not out to hurt me, or to make it difficult for himself, or for me. He knows what this is about—the signal it's sending throughout the universe. He still scares me, but peace… peace is more important than the happiness of one man, even if that one man is me. When Sendak says he doesn't want to go back to war, I think it's a shot worth taking. He fought against Lotor once, and if I can keep him from rising up again... We are all weary of war, Hunk. I don't want you to get involved in this—you should be free to find yourself a great girl or guy that you love and who loves you back, and be happy."

"It's the least I can do… as your best man, I mean. Be the best." Hunk made a wry smile. "Have you talked to Keith, since the, erm, choosing, I mean?"

"No." Shiro's face fell. It hurt, but he understood why Keith didn't want to speak to him. Keith should have been the one waiting for Shiro to walk down the proverbial aisle, to him. Keith was never meant to be his best man—Keith was the one he had wanted to marry. Hunk had graciously stepped up, Pidge taking over as Lance's best woman. "I get it. Why he isn't speaking to me, I mean. I threw him away, then dumped him on Thace. I don't think he wants to see me just now. Thace promised he'd take care of him." By marrying him, as far as Shiro knew. He had lost the right to ask about it, so he hadn't. Keith would tell him when he was ready. If they ever got on speaking terms again. "I trust Thace. He'll make sure Keith is cared for."

"Yeah," Hunk agreed. "He's a good guy. So is Keith. You can't really blame him for thinking that you'd… you and him, right? But he doesn't hate you. Give him time, he'll come around."

Shiro sighed deeply, regretting it immediately. The scent of flowers was overwhelming, nauseating. Maybe they shouldn't have left the planning of the arrangement to Coran. The cathedral was filled with flowers: roses and lavender, violets and peonies. It should have been festive, but Shiro felt as if he was standing in the antechamber of a particularly dreadful funeral parlor. The main difference was that he wasn't dead, he only wished he were. Not entirely true, though. Marrying Sendak was still remotely better than being dead, yet Shiro had only little desire to find out exactly how much. 

There was a knock on the door, not that it meant much because Antok opened it without waiting for Shiro to answer. Antok stuck his head in, the noise from the many voices in the great hall outside rose to a roar. "Commander Sendak and Prince Lotor have arrived with Leader Kolivan and the Princess Allura," Antok said over the noise. "Lance is ready; so anytime you are. There's massive press out there, so get your game face on." Antok grinned, face naked. "I miss it. The mask. But who'd wanna miss this handsome visage?"

"Hah-hah," Shiro said, shaking his head at Antok. He, too, could use a cover, facing the entire universe. Which in itself was remotely less scary than facing Sendak, pretending to be in love with him. "I'd like one right now, if it's not too much to ask."

"I'll tell them you're ready," Antok said. "It can't be worse than the Arena."

"There's compassion for you," Shiro shot back, somewhat perturbed, yet unable to stop a smile. "Why don't _you_ take Sendak, then?"

"I'm too big for him," Antok said with a grin, pointing at his own groin. "He can't take the heat. I'm just too much to handle for one man. Plus, I'd kill the bastard in his sleep and I'm pretty sure Kolivan wouldn't like that. So better you than me. There's a reason I'm not doing any diplomatic duties. I'm done playing nice."

Hunk made a groan and Shiro turned to see him hide his head in his hands. "It's okay, Hunk. Antok was just leaving." Shiro sent Antok an annoyed eye-roll. At least Antok made him smile. 

Antok shut the door and left Shiro and Hunk alone. Shiro blew out a sigh. "So this is it."

"He was right, you know. Antok. You've been through worse."

To some degree Hunk was right about that. The Arena had been worse. Dying had been worse. Being in the hands of the druids had been worse. Leaving Keith, abandoning him, had been worse. There were a lot of _worses_ in Shiro's life. Most of them spoke about how little agency and control he had had over it since he took off to Kerberos. Exception was his marriage to Sendak, that was his own damned fault. He'd created the mess, now he had to live with it. It was already too late to mend things with Keith; it had been from the moment that Shiro had decided to give himself up to any former foe who asked for him. There was nothing he could do, other than to step out into the damned church, walk to the altar, say yes at the appropriate moment, and live with what he had done. With what he had chosen instead of Keith. What a fool he had been, what a coward.

"I'm ready," Shiro said. "Let's do it."

*

Lance was bouncing happily, eager to get out of the confines of the small room.

"Stop it, Lance," Pidge snapped. "You do not go out there until Coran says so. I have checked—Kolivan has arrived, I mean, how would he not, he's been sending you heart-eyes since you told him that you wanted him—well, not so much told him as shoving your tongue down his throat when we were all watching you—so basically there is no chance he's not marrying you, God knows why, because you are _so_ annoying."

"Is my mom there? Can you see her? Where's my dad?" Lance asked, trying to look over Pidge's head out into the cathedral's nave. The pews were filled to the last seat, there were people standing along the walls, every corner of the church was occupied. There were camera drones hovering over the aisle, ready to broadcast the ceremony. If Lance had ever wanted attention, he sure had the eyes of the universe now. Ironic, since he no longer craved it as he did before. He wasn't that much older now, or more mature, he knew that. But he pretended that he was at least a little wiser than when Blue took him on a ride to the space opera. He'd have to grow up fast, though. In a few moments he'd even be a married man, married to the sexiest, hottest Galra alive, one who was in love with him, and there was no way that Lance would make Kolivan regret that he'd asked for him. "Hey, I can see Veronica! Over there." Lance pointed to one of the front pews where Veronica's bespectacled face was turned to look back at him. He waved. "They came!"

Pidge slammed the door shut. "Duh! Lotor picked up your entire family, you idiot. Who can say no to that? I mean, your dad's gonna walk you to the altar. Veronica already lives here. Her little brother is getting married, of course she came. For some reason they all love you, and you know it."

"It's my charm," Lance began, only to have Pidge shoving him away from the door. "Ow, what did I do now?"

"Save your charm for Kolivan. Maybe he'll fall for it. If he's blind and deaf."

"Pi-idge," Lance groaned. "And he did fall for it. He's in love with me. Totally in love."

Pidge looked at him disbelievingly. "Yeah, like any other alien you flirted with—sooo in love. He sure didn't take you for your IQ."

"Hey!" Lance frowned. "He is in love, and I'm in love with him. Seriously, Pidge, he's just… perfect for me. I think that's why I was never really serious with any of the girls I met." He laughed, knowing he probably looked totally smitten. He was, and he was not ashamed of it. "Kolivan was waiting for me all this time, I just didn't know. I'm so lucky; did you ever notice how good he looks?"

"What is _wrong_ with you?" Pidge quipped. She stopped and stared at him. "I've never seen you like this. Never." She squinted. "You _are_ in love with him. You really are. Miracles never cease to happen, because I'd not have believed that had I not seen your stupidly besotted face with my own two eyes."

"Told you so," Lance said triumphantly. "He's—" He sighed again, smile dreamy. "He's gonna be my husband."

"Yeah, because you're on in—" Pidge looked at clock on her phone before she put it in her clutch. She opened the door again when there was a soft knocking on it. 

Coran opened it, Lance's dad hovering behind him. "—ten seconds," Coran announced. He stepped aside so that Lance's dad could get inside.

Lance only managed to hug his dad for a second. "I missed you all," he murmured, his dad's arms tight around him. It hit him that he was no longer their Lance, their child, but a grown man, one who was about to marry. "I'm going to be so happy with him, Dad," he whispered, his dad's familiar scent making him feel small and young. "I'm in love with him."

"He better treat you right," his dad said. "Or I'll have words, alien or no alien." He looked a little sad. "Maybe if we had met him before he proposed we would have been less... anxious."

Lance just laughed. If they only knew what a softie Kolivan was. Man, he was going to be worshipped for life by his own personal space cat… bat. Alien. Kolivan. Lance sighed a deep and happy sigh.

The music started, a powerful piece, the voices of the choir rising above it. Lance gasped, anticipation and excitement rushing through him. He stepped out as Pidge opened the door, his dad's arm around his shoulder. Across the small vestibule the opposite door opened and Shiro walked out, looking none too enthused. No wonder. Lance wouldn't have been as excited had his fiancé not been Kolivan but some other Galra commander, let alone the one that had tried to kill them. 

Lance sent Shiro a smile that wasn't returned. Shiro probably hadn't much to smile about, giving Keith up like that. "It's okay," Lance said, loudly enough to be heard over the music. "Seriously, dude, you can do this. At least Sendak's hot. Evil, but hot. Not as hot as my guy, though."

It was strained, but it was a smile. "Sure, that makes it so much better. He's a violent, cruel former enemy, but he's hot. I guess I'll have to make do. Evil and ugly is so last season. Evil and hot is the new purple."

"That's the spirit." Lance patted Shiro on the shoulder. "Okay, let's go marry for hot dicks and peace on Earth to all mankind. Team Dicks, Not Chicks, that's us."

Behind him, Pidge sounded like she was going to throw up. Lance's dad raised an eyebrow. "Please, Lance." 

"You didn't," Pidge hissed, outraged.

Of course he did. If nothing else, then to see Hunk blush and Shiro laugh. 

Then Lance stepped forward, taking the first few steps down the aisle, and everything disappeared. At the far end, his lover stood, dressed in a red silk tunic that showed off his broad shoulders. Lance could barely contain the joy that spread inside him, little flashes of warmth and anticipation. Kolivan was waiting for him. That instant there was only the two of them, Kolivan and him. Lance knew Shiro was walking behind him, knew that Sendak was waiting at the altar for him, but this instant even their troubles faded away. There was just Kolivan's smile, his golden eyes. Lance could see it, the love Kolivan had for him and it made him walk down the aisle on a cloud, the happiest man in the universe. 

With the choir above them, the music surrounding them, Lance was in his own personal heaven. He took the last few steps to the altar, reaching for Kolivan. It felt like coming home when finally he placed his hand in Kolivan's huge palm. With a besotted expression and a deep and content sigh Lance let Kolivan know how happy he was. Kolivan squeezed his hand and together they turned to look at the Altean priestess and the Galaxy City Mayor who stood at the altar, ready to perform the ceremony.

***

Shiro knew exactly how time worked. It was like space-time had decided to stretch and expand, turning the short walk to the altar into a road of unshed tears and pain, leaving Shiro time to think of all the moments in his life where he had failed. This day, this… mockery of a marriage crowned his list of failures as one of the worst mistakes he had ever made.

Since photographers were placed along the aisle, Shiro kept his face relaxed, a slight but fake happiness the only notable expression. He tried to avoid looking at Sendak, instead looking through him, pretending he was not there. 

Then time stretched and contracted again, and there it was, the altar. Sendak.

Sendak stepped forward. Shiro had to force himself not to flinch. "Shiro." Sendak smiled like he had looked forward to this. "Takashi." His voice turned low and dark, yet loud enough for the cameras' microphones to pick it up. He made Shiro's name sound like something intimate, something that was shared only between lovers. Sendak was apparently a very good actor.

Shiro forced a softer, wider smile on his face. He sent Sendak what he hoped was a smoldering look. They were really doing this? In that case, Shiro could be of actual help: he had learned to please an audience in the Arena. Nothing was a better or faster teacher than the threat of dying painfully. "I missed you," he got out. He was whispering, hoping that nobody could hear the contempt that he felt, but only the words. "Sendak…" Shiro let his hand fall into Sendak's real one. It was huge and warm, something to hold on to. it was strangely… safe? 

"Thank you," Sendak murmured, pulling Shiro into his arms. "I knew you would not dishonor me."

Sendak didn't smell of wet dog, like Shiro had thought, perhaps hoped, giving him an excuse to be even more appalled with his fiancé. Instead he smelled like linen, hung out to dry, or like the forest in the early morning. Shiro sighed, forcing his body to relax, forced himself to hide the tension of being touched by a man he detested. Yet Shiro knew what Sendak meant and decided not to take offense. "Let's just continue with the charade," he murmured, face hidden from the cameras. "I guess we're both in this, so let's get it done."

"Indeed." Sendak's chest shook, like he was laughing. There wasn't much to laugh about in Shiro's opinion, but the alternative was to cry. He didn't think that Sendak knew how. 

Shiro stepped back, again attempting to put a look of adoration and love upon his face as he let go of Sendak. He was sure he looked like he was suffering from severe constipation, but that was what they got, the vultures who waited for his reaction. Whether they hoped for a love story, or for something worse, for his suffering, Shiro had no idea. There were enough of those who would rather see him tortured than married. Little did they know it was all the same to him. 

A look at Lance and Kolivan helped him stand strong. Their happiness was his prize. The feelings they shared, Kolivan and Lance, made Shiro feel as if his world was about to collapse, dread trickling over him like icy water. That was how attraction and love should look. The two of them did not have eyes for anyone but each other. Lance lit up the cathedral with a wide smile, and Kolivan looked at him like he was the center of _his_ universe, the small, soft smile spoke about their connection. Shiro made a small huff. He would never have that, but if his marriage to Sendak could give Lance this, it would be worth it. 

Shiro turned to look at the audience, seeking reprieve from the onslaught of love that came from Lance and Kolivan. it was a mistake. There, on the third row, Keith sat, his eyes trained on the scene at the alter. Keith was looking at him like he was a stranger, entirely without emotion, two people passing each other in the street. Thace sat next to him, arm around his shoulder, his hand hanging loosely against Keith's chest. There was a ring on his finger. Thace touched it with his thumb, nodding almost imperceptible. A message. It was done. A bridge—another bridge—was burned. Shiro's heart felt like molten lava had been poured into it. Keith turned away, instead looking up at Thace. There was a smile for him, a soft whisper as Keith shifted closer, leaning into Thace's embrace. 

Shiro refused to look down for the dagger in his chest. He was sure it was there. It felt like it.

Shiro closed his eyes, shutting out the world, internalizing the pain. He had survived so much. War, Sendak, the Arena; druids and Haggar's experiments. Having his soul ripped out, his self, his body abused… He could survive this as well. 

His name was Soldier and his purpose was peace. That was all there was to it: he was saving the universe. Easy. Play the part, reap the reward. 

The large purple reward, fangs and claws and nightmares, that was what he was about to marry. His life in a nutshell.

The druid stepped forward. Shiro managed not to flinch; he had to remind himself that this one was an Altean druid, one sympathetic to peace and friendship. "Say your vow, Takashi Shirogane."

Shiro rambled off the lies he had practiced since yesterday, his mind elsewhere, out there, in space. God, he wished he was back in Black, flying into the unknown. Again he looked at Sendak tenderly without emotions, smiling without joy. Sendak said his portion of the bullshit they had to perform, and Shiro did not listen. He sent Sendak a look of utter adoration, definitely worth the Oscar. He took off again, into space, pretending to be present.

" _Do you, Takashi Shirogane, take Sendak as your lawfully wedded husband?_ "

The mayor's voice crept into Shiro's mind, under his skin, grating and unwanted. "I—" Shiro looked up, breathing suddenly fast, too fast, his pulse rising. His hand was wet with sweat as he held it out, slightly shaking. He wanted to scream his refusal in the face of the Galra who stood in front of him, to shout at the fake smile and the expression of love that covered what Sendak truly felt. The same, Shiro was sure, as he did: revulsion.

"Takashi, please." The words were low, but the meaning clear. Shiro quickly put on his game face, hoping nobody had seen his pain. "I was lost in you," he said, intending it to be loud enough for those closest to them to hear. "And I do! Yes, I do!"

Sendak slid the ring on his finger, a little clumsily, as if he wasn't used to handling small things with his prosthetic hand. It was somewhat relieving that Sendak had opted for a Galra-sized hand, and not the odd warhammer-claw. Hunk stepped up, handing Shiro the ring intended for Sendak. It was heavy and golden, cold. Sendak held out his hand, calm and stable, as Shiro put the ring on him. Again concentrating on playing the bedazzled lover, Shiro sighed and looked at Sendak with what he hoped was a passable imitation of tenderness.

The druid said something Shiro didn't hear. It sounded like a blessing. Or a curse. "I hereby pronounce you married!" the mayor said with glee. "You may kiss your husband."

Oh, _no_!

Anything but that. It was not that Sendak was ugly, he was not even unappealing compared to many other Galra commanders, but Shiro had projected quite a lot of his suffering in Galra hands upon him, and kissing him was almost more than Shiro could stomach. His last kiss… thinking about the last kiss he had, Adam's goodbye... it brought with it a pain of its own, and he threw the thought into the darkest corner of his mind, hoping it would stay there. This moment was taken right out of his nightmares. There was no mercy to be found for his heart. 

He could do it. War was still worse. Sendak wasn't to blame for the arena, nor had he experimented on him. They had fought like soldiers, an equal battle. That was all there was to. Sendak was a cruel man, a hardened soldier, but he was not a druid, not Haggar. He was not a torturer, just a soldier who had done what was necessary to win a war. 

Oddly enough Sendak did _nothing_. Shiro looked up at him, only to see the minuscule twitch of an eyebrow, raised in a silent question. Shiro answered it by putting his hand in Sendak's, following the pull willingly, or as willingly as he was able, when Sendak took him into his arms. Close up Sendak was huge, broad, and Shiro almost drowned in his warmth, his scent. Shiro turned breathless, a mix of fear and surprise, like his body expected pain. Yet nothing happened, nothing painful. Sendak bent down and pressed his lips to Shiro's.

It was tender and warm, not brutal as Shiro had imagined. He was kissing the Galra who was possibly the fiercest, strongest warrior in the entire universe, and it was _soft_. Sendak's lips moved against his, and Shiro could not stop himself from answering the kiss, his lips parting slightly. It had been so long since he had been kissed and he was hungry for it, even if it was Sendak. His hunger had been dormant, quiet, but the sensation of a warm body against his own, of the damp lips on his mouth, had his greedy little hunger raging for more. Shiro slipped. He didn't give a fuck that he was kissing Sendak. If this was the last kiss he would have in his life, he would make it a memorable one.

Sendak seemed to agree with that notion. He complied, his Galra arm pulling Shiro flush against him, the other hand in Shiro's hair, gentle, but firm. Caught between the urge to shrink away in disgust or to throw himself at Sendak, Shiro gave in, if only for a short time. Sendak's tongue was in his mouth, his fingers buried in Sendak's fur, silken-soft and not at all unpleasant. Sendak made a dark purring sound, cut off as quickly as it had appeared, the ghost of a gasp breathed into Shiro's mouth. Shiro swallowed it all eagerly, soaking up warmth, letting the kiss settle in his memory, precious and ugly both, yet something he would have to keep confined, a small treasure to keep, for it was a kiss that had to last him a lifetime.

Reluctant to stop, and dizzy from pleasure that should have felt anything but pleasurable, Shiro pulled back, eyes unfocused as he looked up at Sendak. He had a similarly dazed look. 

"Well played, Black Paladin," Sendak whispered, licking his lips. His one eye was half-closed, like he had to pull himself out of a daze. "A little too well. They will love it."

Shiro had loved it, too, forgetting entirely that he'd been kissing the enemy. He would never admit to that, but at least the kiss would be something to remember. "They better." He looked at Sendak with fake adoration. "First and last time."

"At least we agree on that," Sendak said, forcing a look of love on his face. The fangs were disconcerting. "Husband."


	11. Chapter 11

Staring at Shiro and Sendak making out like they were mad for each other, mouth open in surprise, Lance wondered again how his friend and commander could marry this, the most terrifying monster of all. That Kolivan looked similar to Sendak mattered little; it was what was on the inside that meant something. In Sendak's case, Lance was sure it wasn't puppies and kittens, but something black and disgusting, bile, maggots and possibly also… also… something vile. More vile. He really wished that Shiro didn't have to go through with it, but one thing Lance knew: when Shiro was in hero-mode, it was better not to stand in his way. Lance wished there had been something he could do. While marrying Mullet wasn't Lance's idea of fun, Lance had been sure that Mullet and Shiro would have gotten their shit together and confessed. Instead Shiro had volunteered for this. Lance would definitely have taken Keith if the alternative was Sendak. 

"Dude, I am _so_ glad it was you, and not... that," he whispered to Kolivan, clinging to his arm. Kolivan huffed, looking at him with That Look. 

"I would have fought Sendak for you, had he claimed you." Kolivan sounded deadly serious and the low whisper made the underlying threat sound even more serious. "And I would have won."

"My hero," Lance breathed, imagining how hot Kolivan would have looked as he disposed of Sendak. Man, he was so gone for Kolivan. 

"Quiet, boy. It's our turn now."

It was. Or it would have been if Shiro and Sendak hadn't decided to make a public spectacle out of making their vows, that was. That wasn't a kiss. It was quiznaking foreplay! 

"Are they serious?" Lance hissed. "They hate each other."

"They do hide it well," Kolivan said coldly. "I suppose we have to wait. Perhaps Commander Sendak will choke on so much tongue."

Lance had to hide his laughter behind his hand, still keeping his voice low so that no one could hear. "I shouldn't laugh. I know how Shiro feels about him, and it's no joke, Koli. I almost feel bad, being here with you, in love and stuff… I am so lucky I got you." 

"You were generous with your affection when you accepted me," Kolivan murmured. "I am a very fortunate man." He, too, stared at Sendak and Shiro who finally decided that they had had enough. 

Lance caught Shiro's eyes as he stepped apart from Sendak. He looked ashamed. Yeah, Lance would have been, too. So Shiro was performing the Voltron Show, Earth Edition, the one where he was in love with Sendak? It made more sense. Their marriages _were_ for show, for the public. Lance had gotten lucky for the first time in his life. Shiro? Not so much. 

Lance sent Shiro a look. _Are you okay?_ , he tried to communicate. There was no smile from Shiro. That was answer enough. But Shiro nodded, lying without words. _Go, get married,_ he mouthed, turning away as Sendak demanded his attention. Shiro made a smile that didn't reach his eyes. He looked down, away, as he was embraced by Sendak.

Lance felt helpless, torn between feeling sorry for Shiro and happy for himself. He pushed the thoughts about Shiro's misery away, instead focusing on Kolivan, on their ceremony. Lance wanted to remember the day as a happy one. For a moment he looked out into the huge room, at the many guest, finally letting his gaze rest upon his family, the whole lot gathered in the front pews. His mom sat there with a handkerchief clutched in her hand, wiping her eyes. Veronica and Louis sat close together, both grinning, Veronica giving him the thumbs up. His dad looked calm, like the entire 'my son is a celebrity and he's marrying an alien' only had gotten to him seconds ago. When he saw Lance looking, he nodded a few times, like he was okay with it, with Kolivan. It wasn't every day you got a purple alien space cat as your son-in-law, and Dad took it in stride. 

"Beloved?" It was Kolivan. 

It was time, it was truly time. They had mated, but marriage meant a lot to Lance, just as a mating meant something deep to Kolivan. Lance turned back, looking at Kolivan, swallowing nervously. It was hard to breathe. He was going to be a married man. "I'm ready."

"For the second time this morning, it is my pleasure to join in marriage two people who, despite differences in upbringing and appearance, have found love with one another. Not even the distance between the Galra nation and Earth could keep them apart," the mayor said, showing with a hand that Lance and Kolivan should approach. "If you wish to exchange vows, you may do so now, Lance and Kolivan, Paladin and Blade leader, before you enter into this union before us all, a union between hearts."

Stepping up to Lance, Kolivan reached for his hand. Lance's legs felt like overcooked spaghetti. He let out a shaky breath as he let Kolivan take his similarly shaky hand. 

"My beloved," Kolivan began, his eyes on Lance. Again the world turned narrow, small, only Kolivan and he were here. "My beloved Lance. For a very long time, I had my heart hidden away, a shriveling heart, one that was malnourished by the lack of love. Love was forbidden, a danger, a means to hurt. And hurt it did. Brother after brother, sister after sister came to us, to the Blade. Many are gone now, fighting and dying in a war that is now of the past. Every one of them left a scar in my heart, making my determination not to feel, not to want, not to desire, even stronger. Then you came, a hero in a blue lion, and my heart awoke, unused to such emotion that you elicited from it. I could do nothing to convince it to rest, for I had fallen in love with you before I knew it." Kolivan paused, pressing his lips together. This time it was _his_ hand that shook. 

Lance smiled, because how could he not, joy welling up inside him like a cool and clear spring, fresh and soothing. He was loved, God almighty, he was loved. Kolivan's confession was sad, his abstinence of everything that made life enjoyable was almost bringing Lance to tears.

"I believed I loved in vain," Kolivan continued, "but we are here now, because I was wrong. It was not in vain. You accepted my offer of marriage, of a mating, right away. Some would say too soon—" There was a loud laughter from the guests. It was no secret how Kolivan had courted. "But I have waited long enough. My promise to you, Lance, is that you shall never be without a friend, a lover, a husband. You will never be alone. You will never have to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders, not by yourself. I will be at your side through it all. For now my heart has healed. It is filled with love for you, and I will dedicate my life to give you that: my heart and my love. That is my promise to you."

Lance felt like he was about to swoon. He rubbed his eyes, and his hand came away wet with tears. Kolivan was such a softie, but damn, he had a way with words. Lance's flirting was babbling from an amateur compared to Kolivan's declaration of love. Because every word came from the heart. He felt almost ashamed that his vow was plain and short, deliberately short. For once, Lance had thought it through. He wanted to get it right, to say what he wanted to say, no flirting or hiding his insecurity behind a joke. Kolivan deserved better. He deserved honesty. He deserved Lance, the real Lance. 

With eyes stinging from the tears he held back, Lance breathed in deeply to calm himself. "I have no fancy words. For once I have no fancy words." Next to him Shiro chuckled. Lance turned and winked at him. He was still Lance after all. But his attention was soon back on Kolivan, and Lance knew that was how his life would be in the future, his attention directed to the man who mattered most to him. "When you came to ask for me," he told Kolivan, "I was surprised. I had not considered that a man, a Galra, would be my thing, but it turned out that it was. With you…" Lance sighed and smiled shyly up at Kolivan. Kolivan's eyes were shiny, too. "With you, I no longer need to be anyone but myself. You like me as I am, and I'd not want you to be other than the guy I met in space, fought a few battles with, and well… the guy I fell in love with. You made me see that it doesn't matter if you're guy or a girl, or something else entirely, as long as there is love. It's like we just… fit. We're soulmates—that's how I feel. Although I don't understand how and why, because you're this super hot ninja dude and I'm just Lance. It took me a war to understand that it's okay to be just Lance, and here I am, the entire universe looking at us, and I don't care anymore about being a hero or getting a parade. I want to be with you… always. That's what really matters. So my promise to you is that I'll be me, and I'll be with you, and I'll love you the best I can— I—" Lance's voice broke. "I— I love you, Kolivan!"

"And I you." Kolivan made a soft purring gasp before he took one long step to take Lance in his arms. "I love you."

There was multiple _awwws_ from the guests, and Lance's mom hid her face in the gigantic white handkerchief. Lance laughed through tears. "Can we please get married now?"

The mayor was ready. He, too, looked a little teary. "I believe the entire population has already heard how Leader Kolivan courted and won Paladin Lance. Is there any way to set a better example for love and peace than this?" The mayor beamed, his round face a small sun that spread such contagious joy that Lance was sure that the Galaxy City mayor would be next in line for a Galra spouse if he gave himself up to alliance. "So… Lance, do you take Kolivan as your husband?"

"Hell, yeah!" Lance almost shouted, blushing when he realized where he was. "I— I mean, I do. Yes. I do."

The mayor attempted to keep a straight face. "And do you, Kolivan of Marmora, take Lance as your husband?"

"I do." Kolivan straightened, standing tall, proud. "I most certainly do."

Their friendly druid stepped forward and said something in Altean, a blessing, maybe. The mayor nodded, like he knew what it meant. He raised his hand. "I hereby pronounce you husband and husband. You may—"

Lance had waited long enough. He threw his arms around Kolivan's neck. Luckily Kolivan was on with the program, meeting him with an embrace that lifted him off the floor, their kiss needy and warm. And because they had more common sense than Sendak and Shiro, the kiss did not last as long, but Lance was fine with that. Because the kiss was _familiar_. He had kissed Kolivan so many times since the courting, and it was hot and arousing and the best of it was that he could have more of the same. Quiznak, he wanted more of Kolivan. For the first time in his life, Lance wanted the same. Not a new girl, another flirt. Just Kolivan. Just Kolivan—his husband. 

Kolivan's smile turned into laughter as he let Lance slip down to stand. "I will have my hands full with you."

"Can't let you get bored, old man." Lance took Kolivan's hand, turning to the guests, raising a fist triumphantly, smiling widely as one of the camera drones zoomed in on them. "Mine! Eat your hearts out, Galra boys and girls, because this one's mine!"

***

The silence in the car was almost too much. Shiro didn't know what to say. They were married now, Sendak and he, their fates forever entwined. Strangely what bothered Shiro most what that he'd had his tongue in Sendak's mouth, which was surprising on several levels. Firstly, he still had it—his tongue. He wouldn't have put it beyond Sendak to actually bite it, but that hadn't happened. Secondly, he'd had his tongue in Sendak's mouth and he hadn't had a flashback, which was even more strange. The nightmares he'd had… Sendak was the man of his dreams, sure, just like Haggar was the woman. Witch. Nightmare.

"It will not happen again," Sendak said like he'd been able to read Shiro's thoughts. Sendak wasn't looking at him, but instead out the window. "We agreed that we would not have any physical contact other than what is necessary to keep up appearances. I imagine that you are as appalled by this... this... display as I am."

Shiro nodded, even if Sendak could not see it. Clearly, Sendak wished to honor the promise he had given: Shiro would not be forced to perform in bed. They had an agreement, and it meant something to Sendak. Shiro had as much desire to touch his new husband as Sendak had to touch him, so no more than the bare minimum would suit them both. "Yeah," he said. "It won't." He paused, attempting to be cordial. "I appreciate it."

The only reply was a gruff, "Hmpf," from Sendak which could mean just about anything. 

Relief from the awkward car ride came quickly as the limousine came to a halt in front of the Altean Embassy. Unfortunately it meant another round of playing _the good husband_. This was it. The test.

There was a huge throng of people waiting at the fenced-off building. Shiro shrank back from the window as paparazzi and journalists attempted to get to the car. There was nothing to see for them through the tinted glass, but they had to step out of the limo at some point. Shiro did not look forward to it. Behind them the limo with Kolivan and Lance arrived, and the audience's attention was divided, leaving their driver enough room so that he could get out and open the door for Shiro. A few Galra security guards and soldiers from the Garrison managed to push the onlookers back to the cordoned off area, leaving the red carpet free for them to walk.

"I imagine it would ruin my reputation with Princess Allura if I killed a few of them," Sendak growled. "Not for the lack of desire to do so. Have they no respect?"

"Very little," Shiro said as he got out. He was about to walk away, then remembered that they were newlyweds in love. If only. Instead of rolling his eyes at the mere idea, Shiro waited until Sendak got out too, the sheer size of him eliciting gasps from those who had never been close to a Galra before and from some who had. Somehow it made Shiro gleeful that Sendak made such an impression. Not because Shiro wished ill on those who wanted to see the 'celebrity couple', but because it made him feel… not safe—someone like Sendak was not safe—but like he had a warrior having his back in a battle. A scary, relentless warrior, but still. 

Sendak stood there, silent, staring at the audience like a lion would look at his pride. Sendak was proud, arrogant, cold. He didn't say a word, just glared at the crowd, but it was enough to make some the most eager and annoying step back. There was nobody in the universe who did not know who Sendak was and what he was capable of.

"Come, husband." Sendak held out his hand for Shiro to take.

The show had to go on. Shiro simply went with the flow and did what Sendak asked. It would be over by tomorrow. Tomorrow they could go on with their lives, their anticipated peace interrupted only occasionally by the appearances they would make, playing the loving, peace-seeking couple. It was not a too steep price to pay for peace.

Kolivan and Lance was getting out of the car and Shiro made a small wave in Lance's direction. _They_ looked like a proper couple. Lance was so happy. Shiro wanted that for him, for all of the Paladins. He sighed and started walking towards the gate, Sendak carefully shortening his steps as not to make Shiro run. 

A journalist was shouting at them, his photographer waving at them. "Hey, Commander Shirogane! Galaxy City News here. Is it true that Paladin Keith married Thace of Marmora? Do you have a comment?"

Shiro stopped, frozen on the spot. He knew, thanks to Thace, but having it thrown into his face… "I—"

Suddenly the photographer was over the barrier, jumping in front of them before security could grab him, flash going off. Shiro gasped. He went into attack mode instantly, already shaken, ready to fight for his life.

But Sendak took two steps, his body shielding Shiro as he roared at the intruders. Putting himself between Shiro and the paparazzo, keeping a firm grip on Shiro's hand. Sendak grabbed the camera before the paparazzo could react, crushing it to pieces with his robotic fingers. Sendak just opened his hand and let the pieces fall, staring at the photographer with the utmost contempt. "Consider yourself lucky that it was your device and not your skull that I broke so easily," Sendak said in the tone he'd use on his underlings. His tone was cold as ice, devoid of emotion. "Let it be known that _anyone_ , Galra or human, who bothers my husband will not meet the same leniency. Consider your life a gift from me to you on this day of celebration."

Shiro forced himself to breathe calmly. He was torn between pulling out of Sendak's grip and stepping into his arms. Was it possible that Sendak had not exaggerated when he said that Galra mates protected one another? Before he could decide, it turned out he did not have a choice. Sendak draped his arm around Shiro's shoulder, engulfing him in soft fur, strong muscles flexing as he pulled Shiro closer.

"You didn't have to do that," Shiro said, breathing out the tension, warmth soaking into his skin, not entirely unpleasant. That Sendak two seconds ago had threatened another human… somehow Shiro was—pleased? Shocked, but weirdly pleased.

"You okay?" It was Lance. "What a jerk! Man, he deserved that." Lance poked at the remains of the dead camera with his boot. "You'd do the same for me, right, Koli?"

"Any time," Kolivan said, expression inscrutable. "Although I would use my words first. Maybe." His reluctance to immediately attack papparazzis for Lance did not stop him from sending Sendak an appreciative nod.

"My hero!" Lance declared dramatically. "Now let's get inside and look at the gifts. I want all the gifts!"

"I assume that is why this little human married you, as you have little else that is attractive. Gifts." Sendak snorted. "Now, _my_ husband, on the other—"

"Don't push it," Shiro snapped. "And I want to see them too." Shiro couldn't care less, but getting inside the embassy would get them out of the public eye, at least for a short time, not that Shiro looked forward to neither reception, nor to anything else that would happen tonight. Gifts… he had no family. The Paladins, the Holts. Allura and Coran. He didn't think there would be much to look at.

Lance patted Shiro on the shoulder. "You OK, dude?"

Shiro was sure he looked tired, but he nodded. "It's fine."

Sendak made a grunt that could mean anything, but he followed them like an obedient puppy as soon as Shiro started walking. Sendak still had Shiro's hand in his. At least they would make the front page looking like lovers.

***

Lance felt like a child in a toy store. He really didn't care about half the stuff they'd been given; most of it was from people he didn't know, and from planets he didn't know, either. He appreciated the thought, of course he did. But three sets of china for twenty-four people was over the top, and a collection of Radavian snakes from the leader of Radav wasn't up on his list, either. Maybe he could give them to Mullet? Then again, he'd decided to be nice to Keith. They were friends after all, and this day sucked for Keith. Man, if Kolivan had married someone else… Lance would have been really angry. Or more like really sad, if by 'sad' one meant 'devastated'.

"Hey, there are gifts for Keith and Thace too! It's insane how fast news travel. Is it true?" Lance had lowered his voice, speaking to Kolivan. "Did your ninja spies tell you? About Keith and Thace."

"No." Kolivan frowned and stepped closer to the gigantic pile of wrapped boxes of all sorts and sizes, spread out on several tables. "I was too busy making arrangements." He stopped in front of the one that apparently was meant for Thace and Keith who—also apparently—had married while everybody else was asleep. Lance felt cheated. He didn't exactly like Keith, but they were friends.

"Yeah, me too. He really was in a hurry. Keith, I mean." Lance walked closer to the the smaller table. There were only a few gifts on it. Huh, one from Iverson? Another from Princess Allura and one from Krolia, even though she was on a mission. There was a huge gift box on the floor. There were sounds coming from it. Careful, having his recent experience with the Radavian vipers in mind, Lance approached it with some apprehension. "I know it's Keith's present, but—" Lance pointed at the box. 

Who is it from?" Kolivan looked at the big box. It moved. He searched for a card, something to identify it. "Oh." 

Lance had rarely seen Kolivan express surprise. Well, there was that time when he did that thing with his tongue on Kolivan's dick… apart from that, Kolivan was the poster boy for 'emotionless' when he wanted to be, and the small outburst was unexpected. "What is it?"

"It's from the Quantum Abyss in the Xorit system—there is a very old tribe of… you would describe them as… fish? No, whales. Space whales. They are highly solitary, but also able to see the past and the future." Kolivan tapped with a finger on the box. It growled.

"I don't think it's supposed to do that," Lance said. "What is it with people? Or whales. We just got a box of frigging snakes, Koli. Who sends living animals as a present? It's weird, and also, also—"

"Stupid."

"Hey! I'm not stupid!" Lance turned around. Of course it was Keith. He forgot about all his promises that he'd be nice to Mullet. "Who are you cal—"

"Not you. Those who put things that breathe in boxes and send them to other people. What did you get? Is it poisonous?" Keith glared at the box. "Maybe Coran could remove it?"

"Yeah, I hope it is, Mullet. It's for you and your Galra."

"What?" Keith stepped back, fumbling in blindly in thin air until his hand landed on Thace's chest.

"And I see the rumors of your marriage was true. Nice ring, buddy."

Thace took a step closer to Keith. "Keith?" He put his arm around Keith's waist, like he wanted to protect him. 

Lance was sure that after the entire Shiro-debacle, Keith _could_ use someone who cared about him. "Yeah, erm. Congratulations. I mean, not bad, Keith. Thace is— I mean, not Kolivan, but—" Way to go, telling Mullet that his husband was hot. 

"I know what you mean." Keith's face was closed. "Thace, could we— I don't want to—if everybody knows?"

"Hey, they'll find out anyway. It's not supposed to be a secret. Like, the exact opposite. We're advertising peace and love. So you better get used to it." Lance sighed. He was fine with the attention, but he too would like to be alone with his husband, but probably not for the same reasons as Keith. Mullet probably never had sex, and well, what with him all caught up in Shiro, he probably never would. With Thace, that was.

Lance didn't know why Keith had showed up at the reception, other than to show off his man and let Shiro know that he didn't give a damn about him or Sendak and the marriage stuff. Could be. Keith could be petty. Lance loved Shiro, he was one of his best friends, but fuck it, Shiro was an idiot. For once Keith was right, being angry or whatever it was that he felt. "I'll cover for you if the two of you wanna get the quiznak out if here," Lance offered.

Keith made a grimace. "We're staying." He made a weak smile. "But thanks."

With a worried expression, Kolivan looked from Keith to Thace and back. "So you have taken one of my best Blades as your mate? Hm. You chose well." Kolivan reached out and squeezed Keith's arm, nodding. 

Maybe it was some secret spy code or lingo they had going on, for Keith nodded too, sniffling like he was about to cry. "Yeah." Keith shoved his hands into his pockets. He hadn't bothered changing from black jeans into something suitable. His skin was a mess too, but Lance gathered the guy had been too busy crying to keep up a regimen of proper facial care.

"Keith agreed to be my mate and husband, Leader." Thace bowed his head. "I will do my best to be a good mate to him."

"I believe you will, brother." Kolivan's stern face fell. "I am happy for you. Sometimes love comes to us when we least expect it, and you have waited a long time."

Lance backed out. This was not his to hear, not that he didn't want to hear it—he was curious as to why Keith had done what he had done. It sounded very much like Thace had _wanted_ Keith for some time. Huh? What was it with Keith that made all the cool guys fall in love with him? Lance shook his head. It was too much to think about on his wedding day. So he grabbed Kolivan's hand, pulling at him. "Hey, come on. Let's open some more gifts, and then we can have some of Hunk's food, yeah?"

***

Keith's gaze followed Lance as he moved away. He didn't know what Lance's deal was, but being angry at Lance was better than being in pain. It only dawned then that maybe Lance had been semi-obnoxious on purpose. Sendak and Shiro was nowhere to be seen; they were probably at the bar, needing something to drink. Keith would take to drinking too if he was married to Sendak. The thing was: it was Lance and Kolivan's wedding too. Lance was sort of his friend, and Kolivan was like a second father, so Keith really wanted to be here for them, at least to show that he cared. Which he did. He cared about Shiro, too, far too much, which was why he _didn't_ want to be here. No thanks, he'd prefer not to see Sendak slobber all over Shiro again anytime soon, knowing that _he_ could have had Shiro, had he been brave enough to ask. He shrugged off the sadness and pain, determined to ignore his broken heart. "I guess Lance was right: I do have to get used to it."

Keith hadn't even asked Thace what he wanted to do, stay or go. Thace had done everything for him, not asking anything in return. However, Kolivan's words had made a deep impact. Thace had not been lying when he said that he'd been in love with him for a long time. Keith had decided already that he would have to be the best mate and husband to Thace, never letting him regret that he had agreed to marry, and knowing that Thace had loved him for a long time cemented that determination. Keith had used Thace, he knew he had. But they were mates now. His future was with Thace, not Shiro. He had made his choice, like Shiro had made his. One day, Keith hoped, his love for Shiro would fade into the love for a friend and he would come to love Thace as more than one. Some day. Soon. 

Still didn't mean that Keith wanted to stay at the reception a moment longer than he had to. 

Slowly he went on tiptoe to press a kiss to Thace's cheek. Thace smiled, looking down at him with eyes that could have made Kaltenecker moo with envy. "I think we should look at that box," he said, "the one that is meant for us." He looked searchingly at the pile of presents. "If there is something in it that's alive, we need to get it out of there. Before whatever is in it gets more angry or scared."

"At least the Quantum Abyss whale colony is friendly," Thace said as he kneeled in front of the box. "I find it strange that they sent us something that is alive, but if they can see the future, they might have thought it to be important." 

The box growled again. "I open it and you grab whatever is in it, if it tries to run." Keith fumbled with the bow on the top. There was a card. He didn't know whales could sign cards. They probably couldn't. He opened it. " _In the darkest hour, you shall follow the light. Awash with blood you shall be whole_. What the hell does that mean? That's pretty cryptic, even for a space whale."

Thace shook his head. "No idea. Maybe we'll find out when we see what's in there."

"No such time as the present," Keith said, almost merrily. At least the stupid gift gave him something else to worry about other than Shiro. He ripped off the bow and pulled the lid off. He looked into the huge box, only to have two large eyes stare up at him from the farthest corner of it. There was a pathetic whine. "Oh," Keith said. "It's a… puppy? He reached into the box slowly, hands carefully grabbing the tiny animal. At least he thought it was a puppy. "Is it okay? Do you want a puppy?" he asked Thace, gently cradling the pup in his arms. 

Thace bent down to look at the pup. It growled. "It's not a puppy."

"Shhh," Keith hushed, speaking to the small creature. "I'm married to him, so don't growl." He petted the pup gently. It looked like a pup, it growled like a pup… "So what is it?"

"It's a wolf. A space wolf. Technically not a dog. Not like your Earth dogs."

"Can we keep it? Please?" The puppy was so alone and scared. Keith didn't want to part from it at all. "If the space whales can see the future—"

"You do not have to ask. You are my husband and I am not your master." Thace sighed. "Keith, just… be yourself." He leaned in, kissing Keith on top of his head. "There are things we need to discuss, but you wanting a dog, or a wolf, is not one of them."

"I'm keeping it. Him. Her. Whatever. And we're—"

Somebody was standing next to them. Keith looked up. Oh no. Just the person he did not want to see.

Shiro had an expression like somebody had just married the person he loved more than anything in the world. Imagine that. 

"We need to talk, Keith. Please? I need to talk to you."

Keith straightened up, the puppy still in his arms. His gut burned and his vision was tinged with red. Anger drowned out the pain. "What you need and what I need are two different things, Shiro. I don't need to talk to you. It's something you want so that you don't feel so guilty. You should sort that out with Sendak." Keith knew he was being cruel, but right now he couldn't do what Shiro asked. He simply couldn't. "I have a pup that needs tending to. It was a lovely wedding," he said coldly. "Have a great life. "He looked over his shoulder at Thace. "We're leaving."

With that, Keith did what he had to do. He walked out. He would always love Shiro, always save him, but this time was the one time that took too much.


	12. Chapter 12

The only thing about the wedding that pleased Sendak was the reception. The food was good, the event would not last too long, and he wasn't bothered much by anyone, seeing that he had arranged an assortment of Zarkon's former inner circle around the area in the hall that he had chosen as his. The Alteans were busy talking to the Earthlings, and it was possible to pretend that things were back to normal, except for the major setback of being settled with an unwanted spouse. A glass of Champagne in hand, something humans seemed to think was mandatory at celebrations, Sendak sipped from it, suppressing a sneeze as bubbles appeared to burst in his nose. He rubbed it discreetly. Humans were odd and had primitive desires and wants. 

From his designed post he studied the assembly. The traitor Kolivan had eyes for nobody but the weak Earthling he had chosen. _Pretty boy_. The remaining Paladins were opening gifts with the lanky boy, except for the big one who was busy making sure the food he had provided was delivered to the buffet. Paladin Hunk must have sensed that Sendak was watching him; he turned and smiled, his brown eyes and white smile attractive and warm. Sendak felt the corners of his mouth pull upwards before he could prevent it. He gave in and nodded in appreciation of Hunk's efforts. The food was divine. Letting Hunk oversee the menu and have his Galra friend do the work had been a favorable decision. Sendak considered for a moment that perhaps he had chosen the wrong Paladin.

The mere idea made Sendak laugh silently. Of course he had picked the right one. As if he had asked for Shiro just because Emperor Lotor had tried to persuade him. There was something about Shiro, other than being a good fighter. Inadvertently Sendak raised his hand, touching his lips where Shiro's kiss still burned. It was strange how Shiro always made an impact. Battles, negotiations, the Arena. Even here, when Sendak had thought that there were no more surprises, Shiro had surprised him once again. The kiss had been something, indeed. It was almost a shame that they would never kiss again, but it was for the best.

Even though Shiro was attractive, Sendak was Galra. He did not want to besmirch his body or his pure Galra line with a human. Tonight he would have to, but there would be no kisses, just the penetration necessary to finish the mating ritual in a manner that was satisfactory to the tradition in which Sendak had been brought up. It was enough that he honored the alliance by making Shiro a full Galra mate while a human marriage had been enough. He would not make a husband of Shiro and swear to be true to him by oath, and then refuse to take the vow that made Shiro a mate in the eyes of all Galra. The Earthlings' feeble and weak rituals meant nothing to Sendak, but honor did. Bonding with someone not of the Galra felt disgusting, like little insects were crawling under his skin and in his impeccably groomed fur. Despite his discomfort, his honor was his guiding light; it was honor and duty that had elevated him, and no mate of his would be left wanting when it came to the legality of their union.

Around him his officers were chatting, but Sendak paid them no heed. Instead he watched the Paladins. The little Green said something that made Lance and Hunk laugh. Paladin Lance nudged Shiro in the ribs and Shiro shook his head before he, too, laughed, shaking off the coat of sadness he had been covered in for days, his smile rare, but warm. No, Shiro had not been the wrong choice at all. Shiro was… Sendak pondered upon the word all the while Shiro's smile made him feel oddly pleased.

"Disgusting display of weakness." Commander Haxus stepped closer to Sendak, voice low. "They never learn, these primitive beings." He huffed, his thin face a mask of contempt. A few of the other commanders turned to them, ears peeked, eyes narrowing. "How is it possible to touch such a revolting creature and not feel as if you are touching an animal?"

Ten sets of eyes were at them now. Commander Prorok made a hiss and Commander Trugg let out a snort of laughter. Sendak did not move a limb, but his ears twitched. His face stayed calm. He did not care to look at Haxus. "If you ever offend my mate again, or speak of him with less than the respect you owe the mate of Sendak, Commander of the Galra fleet, right hand to the Emperor Lotor of the Galra, I will rip you into tiny pieces and make you eat them as I go along," Sendak said softly. "And that goes for all of you. Offend my mate again, and you will die. Speak of him without respect, and you will die." Sendak looked at each and every one of his generals, noting who looked back at him with sincerity and who did not. "Is that clear, or would you like me to repeat myself?"

"Clear, sir!" Commander Prorok was the first to step forward, his face honest, fist firmly placed over his heart. "I have fought Paladin Shiro, and he is a brave and able warrior! I congratulate you on your choice of a strong and worthy mate, sir!" Commander Prorok was almost breathless in his eagerness. "Vrepit sa!"

There were others less inclined to obey. Trugg still glared at him, Branko with her. 

Sendak was used to making snap decisions. "Commander Prorok, as of today, you will take command of my combat wing, answering only to me. Your rank will be Wing Commander. See it as a reward for always being honest in your service of the Galra Empire. Haxus, you will report to Commander Throk of the Ulippa System as his sub-commander; take Trugg and Branko with you as your lieutenants. Inform Commander Throk that he is to return to the main fleet. Leave immediately. You are no longer needed here."

Sendak had the satisfaction of seeing Haxus's stricken face. Trugg and Branko gasped in unison, but wisely did not speak. Sendak could just as well have killed them, something he still considered. Haxus had thought himself secure. Trugg and Branko had always been reluctant to accept Emperor Lotor's rule. No other general would make the mistake of questioning Sendak's choice again. On the one hand it was a loss, on the other, Sendak would have Prorok and Throk's undivided loyalty from now on. Throk was an opportunist, but Prorok had proven loyal to the empire, grateful to have been saved and restored from the remains of the Robeast that the witch Haggar had created. Prorok had been loyal to Lotor ever since, and his promotion to wing commander had been imminent. Now it worked well to underline Sendak's displeasure with those who thought themselves above him and his husband. 

It didn't matter what Shiro was, human, Galra, something else entirely. Shiro was his mate, and on his honor, no one offended Shirogane Takashi and remained unscathed.

*

It took Shiro a few minutes to calm himself after Keith and Thace left. He did not have the luxury of mourning alone, and it cost him all his strength to keep smiling, holding back the tears. Keith was right when he had told him that he had lost any right to beg for forgiveness. He had no right to demand anything at all from Keith. He had done what he had done, eyes open, knowing—

No, he hadn't known. He hadn't known that Keith loved him back. Had he been brave enough to confess to Keith, this day had not been a sad one, but instead a happy one—for both of them. The hero who had helped save the world should have brave enough to risk everything, even brave enough to admit his love for Keith. They would have been married today, had he dared. Now everything was lost, except peace. 

Peace mattered. It was a bitter victory. Once more his body belonged to the Galra Empire, although this time the ownership of it was shared with the Coalition. 

A few of the guests looked at him weird. He forced himself to return to the mountain of gifts with his and Sendak's names on them. If there had been pet snakes in Lance and Kolivan's gifts and a wolf in Keith and Thace's, god knew what was hidden in those meant for him and Sendak. 

Luckily the wedding guests left him alone to look at the parcels. Shiro went through the bigger ones, making sure that there were no other alien surprises hidden in them. Unless one counted a silver tea set, a set of twenty four copper pots and pans, and an antique tablecloth brush as surprises. Shiro sure found it surprising that anyone thought that he wanted or needed any of those things. Maybe Sendak had put them on some kind of wish list? 

Shiro felt the tears burn in the corners of his eyes at the thought of his terrifying Galra husband. He clutched at the wedding tunic he was wearing, the silk crumbling under his fingers. He let go of it before he ruined it; it was old, an heirloom, one Sendak had sent him. Instead of tearing it into rags, hating it for everything it implied, he opted on opening more gifts. He started to unpack what turned out to be a state-of-the-art coffeemaker. Hm, that was useful at least. He folded the paper the box had been wrapped in. It had little Voltrons with festive hats printed on it. _Some party_.

Before he could find it in him to wallow even deeper in his own misery, he was pulled back to play the happy husband as a small, well-known delegation approached. Allura was all smiles until she had her back to the assembled guests. Coran's face was serious, and Kolivan looked his usual self: he could win at Poker anywhere in the universe. Lotor looked bored. No wonder, the reception probably lacked the festive moments of Machiavellian mayhem that the Galra loved so much. 

Unfair? Yeah, Shiro was not in the mood to be accommodating. Besides, he wouldn't leave out entirely the option of getting rid of Lotor for supporting Sendak in his pick of spouse. If he could find a shovel and a tarp, he'd consider it. It'd be hard work, hiding Lotor's body in the desert, but he could do it. 

Leaving the thoughts of Lotor's impending murder to better and more appropriate times, Shiro forced himself to look happy. His stomach felt like it was filled with acid and fire. "Have you tasted Hunk's food? It's really good," he offered. It sounded better than _I hate this, I regret my decision and oh, by the way, you'll have to look for a new co-ruler soon._

"Shiro." Allura squeezed his arm. "We haven't had an opportunity to talk. I am very grateful; you did a wonderful thing for peace." Her eyes were sad, despite her encouraging words. "I am aware what you gave up for us. All of us. For the universe."

"Not much. Just my life. Nothing new there," Shiro said, trying not to sound resentful. "But I appreciate the quiet that comes with universal peace, so I'm fine." His anger evaporated under her warm touch. "I'll be fine, Allura."

Coran shuffled his feet and looked away. Shiro knew that look. 

"What? You have not come to ask me for another favor?" Shiro looked from Allura to Lotor and back. "Allura?"

"No, not— we can discuss that when your honeymoon is over. We wanted to make sure that you were all right. Anything but that is unimportant right now. We can talk options when you have settled down with… with Commander Sendak. I understand that Lotor has given you a house."

"Yeah, I haven't seen it, but Sendak told me as much. I don't think there is going to be any honeymoon." Shiro didn't care to thank Lotor. He sighed and straightened up, trying to look alive. "I know this wedding is as much a display of power and politics as it is a party, but—"

"An event we are _so_ pleased to share with our citizens on this day of friendship, love, and alliance." Lotor smirked.

"Ah," Coran exclaimed, making a face like he'd just been spoon-fed a saccharine romance novel. "There is nothing like young love!"

"Sendak is ten thousand years old, and there is no love," Shiro said coldly. Maybe Sendak was rubbing off on him? He hoped not. Yet Coran should knew better. He knew exactly why Shiro had accepted. "Maybe you should go ask him how _he_ feels. Despite his inviting manners and friendly demeanor, I doubt that he is too happy with the arrangement. I mean, an arranged marriage with someone he hates. What could he possibly feel?"

"Yes, yes, maybe we should. Come on, Coran." Allura clearly took the hint that Shiro wasn't interested in any conversation about romance or _options_ , and started towards the group of Galra generals, Kolivan following her immediately. Lotor hesitated. So that was what it was about. _Lotor_ wanted to talk. They could just have said so. 

"We did not speak about—" Lotor's gaze drifted towards Sendak. "I know I asked too much of you again."

"I wasn't myself the first time," Shiro said acerbically. "And you do ask a lot."

"You saved me, and I am eternally grateful for that. For my throne. It is your doing. If… if Sendak ever causes you harm—"

"He won't." Shiro sounded more convinced than he was. "He swore to me, on his honor. I am not one of his underlings, but I—" Shiro paused, wondering why he actually thought Sendak would make good of his word. "Even when he was trying to kill me there was a certain honesty about him. He never lied, even at his worst. Some could learn from that." He looked pointedly at Lotor.

Lotor made a strained smile. "I deserved that one." He hung his head for a moment, hair falling over his face, before he looked up, pushing the hair back. "Sendak is loyal to a fault. You know he is, he would have died for my father, rather than to perish with dishonor. I guess we're in the same boat; he did try to kill me, and now I trust him with my life. Not that I doubt he'd take over the moment he didn't find me adequate to sit on the Galra throne, but for now, he's… docile. But rest assured that I won't forget what I owe you. I asked Sendak to make an offer for you because I _know_ how loyal he is. He honors the old ways; there is no one of purer Galra blood than he. You know how true my—" Lotor made a face. "—how true my parents were to each other. The bond between Galra mates is strong. He will not love you, but I am certain he will be an honorable mate to you, even if it is only by name." He shrugged, then looked down his nose at the assembly of Galra generals. "I told him I'd kill him if he harms you. He laughed at me." Lotor's expression turned cold, the eyes glacier gray. "I was not joking." 

Shiro's felt heavy, tired. "We should both be happy that no journalists are allowed in this hall before the first dance. It would not look good for you if anyone heard that little secret," Shiro said. "I am not sure whether I should be grateful, or the opposite."

"Only time will tell. I imagine living with Sendak will either be disastrous or—" Lotor made a false laughter. "I do not know how to continue that sentence."

"Promising," Shiro said calmly, sarcasm dripping. Clearly everybody thought it would be a clusterfuck of a marriage. "Really promising.

"Please do your best," Lotor encouraged. "It could have been Ranveig or Throk."

"I know." He'd accepted Sendak because he was familiar, a known entity, if fighting to the death told a lot about a person. It probably did. Shiro had yet to find out what, exactly. "There is nothing more important than peace."

Lotor stepped up to Shiro. He put his hand on Shiro's shoulder, a small frown marring his brow, like sadness had taken up temporary habitation there. "Thank you, Shiro." He squeezed Shiro's shoulder and let go, walking away from him. Shiro just stood there, wondering whether he had seen a glimpse of the true Lotor, of honest gratitude. It didn't matter much, but somehow it made Shiro's heart a little less heavy. Peace meant something to both of them, after all. 

*

The pile of gifts worked well as a fort. It kept well-wishers at a distance, and Shiro occupied. He pushed his feelings aside and instead let himself be engulfed in the childish pleasure of opening gifts, either appreciating them, or silently staring at them, wondering what the person who had chosen it had been thinking. It kept sorrow at bay. The number of gifts was astonishing, even considering who they were, Paladins and Galra generals who fought a war. Shiro didn't know how many belongings Sendak had; if he was like the Paladins he would have very little; the Paladins' quarters at the Altean embassy were small, and they didn't need much.

But now Shiro (and Sendak) owned a considerable assortment of things, not to speak of the house that Lotor had offered them. Shiro unwrapped another gift, fingers brushing over the softest knitted plaid. He buried his fingers in it, enjoying the warm, plush sensation. The wool was a pleasant gray color. Shiro liked it. He resisted the urge to wrap it around his shoulders, hiding under it so that the guests would leave him alone. 

It didn't take long for him not to be alone again but the company was not unwelcome.

"Hey, you look—"Hunk stepped up to Shiro. He made a face. "You look like you could need a hug."

Shiro sighed. "I am not even sure what I need anymore. Apart from this new blanket." He frowned, eyes closed. "I'm sorry, Hunk. I'm fine. I'm just tired. It has been a long few days." He plastered the smile back on his face. It hurt. He slid his hand across the fine fabric before he put the blanket down on the table again. "I can't wait until we can leave."

"Hey, man, come on, it's me you're talking to. You're not fine. Can't do much about that, but I made these fantastic pieces of butter-toasted portobellos with smoked Serrano ham and fresh basil, and you need to taste them. Sal is taking care of the buffet, so I'll take care of you." Hunk linked his arm with Shiro's. "It's okay, yeah? I mean, Sendak isn't— I can touch you, right?"

Shiro looked up, around. Sendak was surrounded by his generals, of course he were, why would he bother with humans if he didn't have to; he had made it clear that he didn't care for them, or for him. They looked angry, the Galra, but then again, most of them always did. As if Sendak had sensed that Shiro was watching him, he turned. He looked from Shiro to Hunk, a twitch of his lips, turning into a strangely wry smile. He made a curt nod. It was okay, then, not that Shiro would refrain from hugging Hunk because some old Galra tradition told him it was off limits, but he'd like to put off any conflicts with Sendak, at least until the wedding reception was over. He was Sendak's husband, not his property.

Again, Shiro was happy that they had foregone a full dinner and opted for cocktails and canapés. There were benefits to a flash wedding, few, but they were there.

At the other end of the room Sendak bent down to speak to the approaching Coran, his expression none too pleased. _Great_. Shiro looked away, following Hunk as he pulled him along towards the buffet. Somewhere in the hall, the DJ turned up the music. A woman was singing an oldie about space ships that were made to fly. Right. Shiro managed to find some more fake happiness, mumbling words of thanks to those who approached them. Hunk seemed to have little patience, though, and Shiro realized that Hunk was protecting him.

"Thank you," Shiro said when they stopped in front of a huge tray, filled with the famed portobellos. "For everything. Best man, chef… I put you to work."

"Nah," Hunk said. "We're good. Sal did most of the cooking. Eat."

Like Shiro had any appetite. 

It turned out he had. He hadn't eaten much since yesterday, a fact his stomach decided to argue—loudly. Shiro sighed. Even his body was working against him, nothing new there. He gave up and piled a handful of canapés onto the small plate that Hunk was handing him. He stabbed a piece with a fork, shoving it into his mouth hungrily when the scent teased his nose. It was mouthwatering. "Hmmhm, it's 'ood!" he got out, chewing on the piece. It earned him an encouraging pat on the shoulder from Hunk.

"These are blinis with caviar and sour cream," Hunk beamed and shoveled another batch of canapés on a plate. The caviar was cobalt blue. "Just leave the cream out, if you don't want it. Pour a few drops of lemon juice on it instead." Hunk grabbed a slice of lemon and went on to squeeze it over Shiro's blinis. "Anyway, the roe is from a sturgeon-type fish that Sal imports from the Kalon Quadrant. Sal makes a mean main dish of the fish itself; you need to— Oh?" Hunk looked up, across Shiro's shoulder. "Erm, hi, Commander Sendak. Is, erm— I mean…" Hunk had the expression of a deer caught in the headlights.

Shiro let out a breath so heavy that his shoulders rose and feel with it. "Is everything to your satisfaction, _husband_?" God, couldn't he get a break here? He barely held it together, and playing the lovers and husbands charade took its toll. Shiro didn't have much left in him before he snapped, he was certain. He was grateful that the the reception was a short one. This wasn't a battlefield, but he almost wished it was; that way he'd have stood a chance.

"I have yet to taste all of Paladin Hunk's food," Sendak said. "I expect it to be to my specifications." He made a huff.

Shiro felt very tired. "Just for today, could you not treat us like we're beneath you, or Hunk like he's your servant?"

"We are stronger, faster, have longer lifespans, better hearing, more advanced technology. How are you not beneath us?"

"And you forgot to argue that you're modest, too," Shiro shot back. "Your self-deprecation is astounding."

To his surprise, Sendak laughed. "I chose wisely. You are the only human brave enough to stand up to me. I like that," Sendak said, ignoring that a princess and four other Paladins had done the same, if perhaps not as powerfully as Shiro, and definitely not as close up and personal. Sendak reached for a canapé and swallowed it in one go. "Although Paladin Hunk's food is an allure in itself. He is indeed talented and handsome, but not as handsome as you, husband." 

"Is that… praise?" Shiro put down his plate. "Do not over-exert yourself. I might begin to think you like me, and we can't have that."

"Don't let it get to your head. I do _not_ like you, Paladin, but you are still the better pick. If I was inclined to have two husbands, I would have asked for the both of you, and seeing that I did not, there is your answer."

Hunk made the choking sound of a man who barely had escaped a destiny worse than death. This time it was Shiro who reached out and patted Hunk on the shoulder. "Don't worry. I think Commander Sendak has enough of a spouse in me."

Sendak made another arrogant huff. "I am Galra enough for the two of you. A whole harem, if I had nothing to do but humans."

Shiro's eyebrows shot up. Sendak had humor? Sure, crude, but still."Don't say more words, please. You're scaring Hunk, because you sound as if you actually mean it, the part about Hunk being attractive."

Sendak made a slight bow. "The yellow Paladin is safe from me; I am a married man, Takashi. I merely admired Paladin Hunk's strength and his ability to create tasteful human dishes." 

Shiro held back an outburst, hearing his given name said aloud. He stared at Sendak, not sure whether he knew the significance of it being used to address him. He was American, yes, but his roots were Japanese. It _meant_ something. Judging from how Sendak had attempted to navigate those roots, he knew.

Hunk let out a strained cough, blood rushing back into his cheeks that had taken a slightly paler tone. "I appreciate it. The, erm, compliment. It was a compliment, right?" Hunk carefully backed off, not waiting for a reply. Instead he gathered their empty plates, demonstratively moving a platter here and there, like he was making sure there was enough food for all the guests. Shiro let him. He was too stunned to react.

"Coran informed me earlier that we are supposed to perform the dance in honor of the wedding in five of your minutes." Sendak ignored Hunk's retreat. 

Since it was none of Sendak's concern anyway, Shiro chose to ignore that Sendak ignored it, mainly because it was the easiest. It left Shiro a moment to recover. "I didn't know you—I mean, the Galra—knew any human traditional dances." Shiro cocked his head, looking at Sendak searchingly, concentrating on the task at hand. He refused to let his loss could his actions.

"I did not say that I do. However, Coran advised me to learn one that is commonly used at weddings. I did. It is little different from a combat sequence."

"Marriage is not a battlefield." Shiro barely refrained from throwing his hands up in surrender to the absurd one-track thinking of the Galra. "The first dance is about intimacy or fun or… I don't know… a celebration of the love between two—" Except there was no love.

"The dance will be filmed and broadcast. We have a universe-wide audience to satisfy. Is it not the purpose of our alliance: to unite our races and the races of the entire universe?"

"Yes. Yes, it is. I know. Although I wish this charade was over." Shiro was tired; truth slipped out too easily.

"It is as soon as this dancing is over. Bear with it for a little longer. I understand we have to dissect a cake, and then we are allowed to leave. Unless you wish to stay, of course. You are my husband, and I will adhere to your wishes." Sendak bowed slightly, almost courteously. 

The surprises kept on coming. Sendak was… supportive? "That's kind of you. There is no need to drag it out; if we play the happy couple, people will understand that we leave early for the wedding night."

"Oh, for copulation." Sendak nodded knowingly. If he had discussed that aspect with Coran as well, Shiro would never overcome the embarrassment. "Because they think we desire it. We will of cour—"

"Please!" Shiro didn't care if he cut Sendak off. He just couldn't speak of it just now, being reminded so blatantly that his body was not his own. "What kind of dance did Coran teach you? I assume it was Coran."

Sendak's lips were tense, a small narrow line, like he was displeased by being interrupted. He probably wasn't used to it. "The waltz. He said that you should know it, and if you did not, he said we could try something called Slow Dance. I did not need to learn that, he told me, and that I should just let you lead. I prefer the waltz."

Shiro closed his eyes. This was… ridiculous, tragicomical. Sendak would want to lead so he learned the waltz as not to let go of any control? Incredible. What was he supposed to do? Think of palace, Princess and peace while Sendak twirled him around on the dance floor? "I—" Shiro started, then stopped, trying not to be angry with Sendak. "Slow dancing is more intimate, less formal, like—"

The music stopped, and somebody had grabbed the microphone. "Honored guests. It is time for the human rite of the first dance." Oh, it was Antok. "I give you the married couples, Kolivan and Lance, Shiro and Sendak."

" _Commander_ Sendak," Sendak growled. "And Commander Shirogane. One would think that a Blade had some form of respect for rank. Yet that one…" Sendak's nose wrinkled.

There was a loud applause and the music was on again, this time it was nothing that Shiro recognized, but his guess was that it was Lance's choice. The slow rhythm of a bolero was definitely more intimate than any waltz.

"Slow dancing, not waltz," Shiro said firmly. "Didn't think Lance would be the kind who wanted to waltz around with Kolivan, either."

"If I must." Sendak bowed his head. "What do you require of me?"

"Hold me like in a waltz, but tight. Just sway with me." Shiro had little experience with this kind of dancing. He sent Lance a look, impressed with how good he and Kolivan looked together as Kolivan led Lance into the first steps of the dance. 

Sendak made a nod, no arguments, just action. He, too, sent Kolivan and Lance a brief look. Sendak held out his hand. Shiro took it. A strong arm was wrapped around his back. There was nothing hesitant about the way Sendak moved, following the rhythm to perfection, slow movements as Sendak took them to the center of the dance floor, his grip firm and his steps sure.

Shiro sank into Sendak's embrace, warm and soft, velvet fur against his face. Shiro let himself enjoy the moment, the intimacy of the dance making his body burn with an unfamiliar longing. Shiro wondered how someone so cruel and violent was able to exude such comfort and tenderness, such gentle desire by a mere touch. Shiro hid his face at Sendak's chest, afraid that someone would notice how he felt. He was torn between enjoying the moment and the urge to step back, refusing to feel. He was no more than a soldier who had been sent on a mission, he reminded himself, making the mistake to look up and see nothing but need in Sendak's eye. Shiro looked away. 

He was a soldier, all right, but he had no idea how to fight this battle.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First dance: [Sin Camisas - Longina](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpvZPz0VmPk) by Manuel Corona

He had chosen the music—one of his favorites that was easy to dance to—so he knew what was coming when the slow tune started. Kolivan took his hand and Lance threw his head back, laughing, happiness bubbling inside him like he had Champagne for blood. Okay, so he'd had a glass or two and he did feel a little tipsy, but that was fine. Kolivan was with him and nothing, _nothing_ , was better or more hot than Kolivan. Lance's hand almost disappeared in Kolivan's larger one, a strong and safe grip. 

Lance turned, swirled, smiling. His mom was here, Veronica and Luis, his dad… all of them looking so happy for him, for them. He made a pleased sigh, turned as Kolivan pulled him in, and he went with the music, rotating his hips, Kolivan following him perfectly like he had never done anything in his life but dance. 

"You dance as well as you fight," Lance murmured as he aligned his whole body with Kolivan's, moving, gyrating with the slow beat. "Like you want to take me."

Kolivan's purr rumbled, vibrating against Lance's chest. "You taught me. _The Cuban bolero is like making love through dancing_ , you said. I am making love to you." He held Lance tight, mouth at his ear. "And I do want to take you."

Gasping with pleasure, almost moaning, Lance let Kolivan's desire wash over him, leaving his embrace to make a slow pivot before he returned into his arms.

Lance kept his eyes on Kolivan. There was no one else he cared to look at; his entire world was here, with Koli. He was so happy. He couldn't remember the last time he had felt so good, like there was all sorts of soft things fluttering in his belly. Maybe when he was a kid, playing in the sand on the beach, his mom and dad close. Maybe when they walked away from the last battle a survivor, ready to begin life again. Maybe yesterday, when he'd woken up to see Kolivan looking down at him with such tenderness in his eyes. Yet here, now, with his family and his husband, life stretching out in front of him, an open road he would walk with the man he loved… no, nothing compared to that. As surprising as Kolivan's proposal and his own quick fall into Kolivan's arms and heart had been, he had never been this happy in his life.

Kolivan made a particularly elegant twist and moved his hips just like _that_ , and Lance was _sure_ they wouldn't make it back to his room before they had to do something about the lust their first dance inflamed. He moved his feet and hips to the beat, Kolivan's hand in his, dancing like it was all they ever needed to do for the rest of their life together. There was the tug of a smile on Kolivan's lips, a fire in his eyes. And Lance fell again, like he knew he would do, over and over, for Kolivan. There was no one like Leader Kolivan of the Marmora, and Lance was blissfully in love. 

He would dance with Kolivan until their days ended. Knowing that Kolivan was his for eternity made Lance's heart create a joyful thump-thump-thump to go with the music. He always wanted a family, more family, and now he had it. He had Kolivan. 

So Lance danced like he had never danced before, every step, every move an extension of his feelings. Desire drove his hips against Kolivan's, tenderness followed him as he settled for a few beats in Kolivan's arms. His sense of adventure sent him out in a daring variation of steps, again falling into Kolivan's safe embrace, a smile in Kolivan's eyes. Kolivan _got_ him. 

And love—the sweet, newborn love they had for one another made Lance laugh again as the music ended and the applause began. Because Lance didn't care about applause any longer. He was in love with Kolivan, and that mattered. Kolivan's love was all the approval and acceptance he needed. So Lance kissed his man, sloppy and open-mouthed a kiss laced with hunger and happiness.

*

When the music stopped, it took seconds of silence before it registered with Shiro. He was safe and warm, protected, the languid rhythm making him oddly relaxed. He had put down the soft blanket, one of their gifts, right before they stepped onto the dance floor. Being held by Sendak was like having a softer, warmer blanket draped around him. A murderous, vicious, dangerous blanket, but right that moment Shiro didn't care. There had been nothing but sorrow and sacrifice in his life for too long, so he let go and took what he could get: a few minutes where he didn't have to worry about a thing, not least because he doubted that his murderous, vicious husband had any designs on his life; it would scare the guests and make for awful advertising for the peace process. For a few minutes, Shiro pretended that he was cared for, loved. It was a dream, but life had left him without dreams. All he had left now were the nightmares. Who would blame him for this short reprieve, caught up in an imagined reality.

"Husband?" Sendak's voice was low and purring.

"Mmm?" Shiro drew in a deep breath. Somehow his hand had drifted to Sendak's neck, fur silken between his fingers, the soft little tufts long enough to wrap around one.

"The music has ceased. People are looking at us."

"Oh."

Sendak's fingers were light on Shiro's cheek. "We have a part to play. Look at me." There was a pause. "Please?"

Shiro knew. They were actors for the Galra Empire and for the Coalition. For peace. So he did what he was asked. He raised his eyes. Instead of the usual arrogant, condescending glare, he was met with something else. He never thought he would have Sendak look at him like that. He _knew_ it was all acting. Yet Shiro could not help it. He sighed weakly as he met Sendak's kiss willingly, surrendering immediately to the heat of it, letting himself be engulfed in the flaring need that had nothing to do with Sendak and everything with being touch-starved and lost and lonely.

Sendak purred loudly.

So maybe it had a little bit to do with Sendak. One didn't have to be gay to appreciate that Sendak—apart from his terrible personality—was not unappealing. Shiro followed a trail from Sendak's neck with his fingers, down the broad shoulder to the massive upper arm. He made a small whimper, flushed as he felt the strong muscle move underneath skin. 

"I do not like cake very much," Sendak said, barely removing his mouth from Shiro's. "I do not care about this wedding cake tradition."

"Oh," Shiro said again, his voice drowned out by the whistles and cheers from their guests.

"I do not like you very much, either, but I wish to mate with you. I have a strong urge to do so. Now." There was a dark tinge to Sendak's voice that made Shiro's heart beat faster and his groin tighten.

"Oh," Shiro repeated, which was meant to mean _yes, please, thank you, go on, what are we waiting for_? "You want—"

"It's either here or in my— _our_ house. If you consent. I wish to copulate with you. Instantly. While I have the appetite to do so."

Shiro had the appetite, too, for something other than cake. Like Sendak, Shiro knew it would probably never happen again, which was fine. Better than fine. He suspected the wedding ceremony was to blame; if he had been less tired and more himself, he'd never have touched Sendak. But the ritual and the mood… it had sparked something in him. He understood what Sendak meant. _Get it over with while we are both eager._ Tomorrow they'd be back to business as usual. Shiro wanted normalcy more than he wanted to get laid. It would be one time and then it would be over. It got to him, though, that Sendak felt so safe, an idea entirely contrary to everything Shiro knew about Commander Sendak. Shiro would be lying if he said he wasn't intrigued.

It was different with Sendak the Husband. Sendak the Mate. Sendak the Galra was not what Shiro had thought he would be.

Sendak tightened his arm around Shiro. "Your decision, Takashi?" His breath was a damp puff against Shiro's mouth and he replied instantly, words gone as he wrapped his arms around Sendak's neck once again. This time it was Shiro who kissed Sendak with everything he had, pouring into the kiss all his longing, all his lonely nights in the gladiator pit, all his sorrows and losses: Adam, Keith, all the people he had fought, the lives he had taken, all the _feelings_ that he had repressed, none of them for Sendak, other than the remnants of fear and anger towards the Galra soldier who was now his husband.

He bit Sendak's lip hard. It made Sendak growl. His fangs shone dangerously, lips raised in a sneer.

"Yes," Shiro growled back, sneering at his enemy, teeth bared. " _Now_."

It might be that Kolivan had made a scandal out of running off with Lance at their courting. Which was good, because now the general public was used to it. Shiro had done what he could for peace. Coran could repair the damage—wasn't that what diplomacy was for? Shiro took Sendak's hand. It burned hot against his skin, like the anger and hatred they held for one another had started a fire in Sendak. 

"We will leave. Immediately." 

"For once, we're on the same page," Shiro said. He did not fight it when Sendak strode towards the exit, pulling him along none too gently, walking briskly without saying anything to anyone. He raised his head, meeting any curious gaze with a proud glare. _Nobody_ had the right to judge him for taking what he wanted for once. No one. 

"Where to?" Shiro's heart beat fast. Whether it was the quick walk or the lust that flared inside him that had his heart pounding didn't matter. "We could—"

"Lotor gave us a house. There is a bed. I demand that our mating takes place in a proper manner. We shall lie together in a bed."

Shiro gave a curt nod. "And… copulate?" It was Sendak's wording, not his. They stepped outside the embassy, the crisp night air refreshing and pleasant. There was a soft hum of people speaking, maybe journalists or curious citizens from Galaxy City, waiting outside the gated area to get a picture as the guests left.

"Indeed." Sendak looked around before he opened a screen, typing a message before he grabbed Shiro's hand again. "The limousine will be here in a few ticks."

It was strange, standing with Sendak's hand in his, like it was… normal, a common occurrence. Shiro felt like he should hate him, but he couldn't be bothered to whip up the emotion. Even the disgust was waning. They had to have sex, and better to do it when they both were in the mood. If he could have an hour or two where he could just unleash, forget, it would be worth it. Yes, regret would come tomorrow, together with the return of the disgust and hatred, Shiro was sure. By then, they would be mated, and he would be Sendak's for the rest of his life.

"It is one night, husband. One night. Then we are both free." Sendak's voice was low. Nobody else could hear. The words were but a whisper of wind, flighty and light. "I swore this to you, and nobody shall accuse Sendak of the Galra for being an oath-breaker. I shall lie with you tonight and make you my mate. Tomorrow you will be free of all demands."

"I know. Contrary to what some people believe, I actually do think you are a man… a Galra of honor." 

Sendak just stood there, staring out into the night. The soft wind fluffed up the fur on his chin. He stood proud, like a statue. "So are you. You are a honorable man, Takashi. We _are_ alike, you and I, no matter if you like it or not. You are a soldier. Nothing means more to you than those you have sworn to serve. As my mate you serve me, just as I serve you. You are not my lover, but you are my honored mate."

This time Shiro did not argue. They _were_ alike. Shiro had tried to save Earth like Sendak had tried to keep the Galra Empire together. They had both been fine soldiers, fine officers, fighting for what they believed to be right. The only reason that Shiro was perceived to be right and Sendak perceived to be wrong was that Shiro's side won. It was as simple as that.

The sleek black limo that had transported them here parked at the gates. Their sign to get the hell out of Dodge.

"You lead. Stop for no one," Sendak demanded. "Go."

"But—"

"I have a powerful husband who stood against warriors such as Myzax and myself. I am not needed for such a small task as to remove a few nosy humans. Proceed."

"If at least you did not speak to me like I was one of your officers," Shiro snapped. "But you've got a point." 

"You are not one of my officers. You are my husband."

Shiro rolled his eyes. "As if I needed that reminder." He started walking, determined not to stop for anything. If brute force was what Sendak wanted, that was what he could damned well have. Thankfully, nobody approached them. Maybe no one had expected them to leave this early. 

A Galra security guard with Garrison insignia stepped up to the car. "Commander Shirogane, sir?" He looked from Shiro to Sendak. "Are you well, sir?"

Shiro raised an eyebrow, halfway amused. Did the guard think Sendak was about to abduct him? Shiro made a show out of holding on to Sendak's hand. They were out in public. They had an audience, Shiro told himself. It was only natural to take Sendak's hand. He had no idea why he was suddenly acting so possessively. "My husband and I have—" Shiro blushed. "We decided to leave." It was true, wasn't it? They ran out on their guests like horny teenagers longing to touch one another, horny teenagers who hated one another, too needy to care. Shiro straightened up. "Thank you for your concern. Step down, soldier," he barked, glaring at the reluctant guard.

"Yes, Commander, sir." The Galra straightened up. "Congratulations on your mating, Commanders!" He saluted in the Earth fashion, something Shiro appreciated. He had had enough Vrepit Sas for a lifetime.

"Please relax. We are not at the Garrison," Shiro offered and moved past him, ignoring the few flashes that went off as he did. 

Shiro waited until their driver had opened the door for him, and he slid inside, moving over so that Sendak could follow. The seat dipped considerably as Sendak got in. The toned windows left them in a dim light. Sendak's prosthetic eye shone red. Shiro made a hoarse sound, halfway fear, halfway the same greedy need that had made him kiss Sendak in church and during their dance. At the same time, Sendak made a predatory growl, the only warning Shiro got before he was manhandled into another kiss, hard and wet and cruel. 

Shiro responded with renewed hunger. The world was about to catch fire, and Shiro wanted to burn with it. God, he wanted to burn.

*

"I only want you to be happy." Lance's mom wrung the tablecloth-sized handkerchief around her fingers before she unfolded it and she dabbed her teary eyes with it. She stroked Lance's cheek tenderly. "I have never seen you look like this. Like you do with _him_." Her eyes strayed to Kolivan who was being handed a glass of Champagne by Marco. She sniffled. "You always liked the girls more."

Lance put down the small plate with the sad leftovers of the wedding cake piece he had shared with Kolivan. "And now I like a boy. Man. Galra." Lance looked searchingly at his mom, his own tears threatening to make another appearance. "I'm happy, Mamá. He—"

"I can see that. Every time you look at him, you… your eyes are like little stars." She leaned in and kissed Lance on the cheek. "He is a good man. Not because he is a hero and helped save the universe. Because he is good to my son. I don't care what he is, hero or alien, as long as he is good to you."

Lance watched Kolivan as he nodded, saying something to his dad that Lance could not hear. "He respects me. Likes me for who I am. You know why we signed up to marry… for peace. For marriage. I was lucky. Kolivan was in love with me long before the war ended. I just didn't see it, not until he was right in front of me, confessing his love." Lance had to bite his lip as not to cry again. His mom opened her arms to him. "I love him, too, Mamá. I know it has been such a short time, but I _know_ him. It was just so easy to fall in love with him. I couldn't be any happier. I love Kolivan."

"You are not my little Lance any longer," Lance's mom said, shaking her head. "It is as it should be. Besides, your father likes him too." She lowered her voice. "He hoped that you would end up with the princess, but I believe he thought better of it, now that he met your man."

" _I_ hoped I would end up with the princess, but I'm glad I didn't. Allura is perfect, and I'm… I was an idiot who thought I deserved her just for liking her. Kolivan… I have him because he loves me no matter how stupid I am. How could I say no to that?"

Lance's dad heard them. He patted Kolivan on the shoulder before he dragged him closer to them. Lance could not help but smile. 

"Not the son-in-law I had imagined. He is impressive. And big." Lance's dad looked up a feet to send Kolivan a smirk.

"Not the clan I had expected, either," Kolivan retorted smugly. "You are all very small."

"True," Lance's dad agreed. "But we have cake and rum. And when both are mixed, you get this perfect cake… You need to have a taste, Kolivan. It might be a recipe for the holidays, but Lance loves it. What better occasion is there to enjoy cake than this?"

Kolivan was pulled away, willingly leaving Lance in favor of more cake. Lance sighed with happiness as he watched Kolivan and his dad, both of them engrossed in the appraisal of the cakes Hunk had made, as if one wedding cake hadn't been enough. It was a different happiness, this, a quiet one, one that was about family. Lance was leaning against his mom, like it was the last time he could do that, just hugging her. He was not her little boy anymore, that much was true, but he loved his mom, missed her when his Garrison job prevented him from going to the usual Sunday dinner. He stood together with her, embracing her in silence for a little. The party was great, a simple and relaxed party, but everybody who mattered to Lance was here. He was truly happy. 

His mom squeezed him again, but let go as they were approached by an Olkari delegation. With a kiss on his cheek, his mom went to look for his dad, or for cake. Both, perhaps.

Lance immediately recognized Ryner, even though she was wearing some strange, elaborately embroidered robes that made her look very regal. "Hi," he greeted her, his smile wide and warm. "I'm so glad to see you, Ryner. Didn't know whether you could make it; I wasn't sure you'd be able. It's a long trip."

They clasped hands. "Leader Kolivan and Paladin Lance's wedding? I could not stay away. My congratulations; Leader Kolivan is a lucky Galra."

Lance laughed. "It's usually the other way around; people think I'm the lucky one."

"I would say that you are evenly matched; brave and good men, the both of you. Your offspring will be strong and handsome."

"Our—" Lance laughed. "You do know we're both guys, right? Even if we wanted it—" Lance frowned, instantly lost in thoughts. Did he really want… offspring? He looked at his family. That was answer enough. He had told Kolivan that children didn't matter. He had not been lying, though. He would like a family, but above else he would have Kolivan no matter what it took—it was no sacrifice not to father any kids. But one day… one day he'd like a family of his own if Kolivan agreed. Except they were both guys, so their options were limited. 

Ryner did not laugh. She took Lance's hand, palm up, and placed a tiny round thing in it. It felt warm, smooth as a river rock, heavy. It had a bright green pattern that lit up as he touched it. 

"When the time comes, you place this _here_." She reached out, placing her hand on Lance's stomach, a light and gentle touch. "That is my gift to you. A family."

Lance didn't know what to say. He didn't ask what the stone did, or could do. It was obvious. Besides, he knew already that he wouldn't understand the explanation. It was probably too strange, too alien, too… much? Lance nodded, stunned into near-silence. "When the time comes." He looked at Ryner, their eyes locking, and he saw nothing but care and kindness in hers. He finally found the words, inadequate to describe the way his and Kolivan's future had suddenly been upturned. "It is a precious gift, making the impossible possible. I can never, ever repay you for that. Thank you."

"It is nothing; we are all one with the universe."

Lance closed his hand around the small stone. "Yes." His smile returned, warm and bright. "Only nobody on Earth could do what you did. This."

Ryner just patted his hand, her kindness almost too much to bear. 

Watching her return to her people, Lance stood silent for some time, wondering what kind of miracle he held in his hand, a miracle that was not his alone, but one he would share with Kolivan. With a sigh and with the mature determination that befitted the mate of a leader such as Kolivan, Lance decided that conversation had to wait until they were settled. He put the stone in his pocket, making sure it was safe there, and went to look for his husband. They had a party going on, and despite the ground-shattering gift they had received, Lance intended to make the most of their wedding feast. Who knew when he had a chance to marry again and have another party like this? If it was up to Lance, the answer would be _never_.

*

Thace did not know what to think of it, yet he could not help believing that Keith's outburst towards Shiro had been necessary. Keith had been simmering with anger and hurt, and although Thace wished no ill on Shiro, he felt his own raging emotions had been placated by the release of his mate's anger. Neither Thace nor Keith had asked to be pulled into this emotional whirlwind. Even though he had been handed on a silver platter the man he loved, Thace wished it could have been different. But done was done. The time of choosing was over. Vows had been exchanged. There was no turning back.

Stepping into the small room that was Keith's home, Thace carefully put down the puppy. The wolf was off immediately, sniffing at Keith's belongings. 

"I'm exhausted." Keith threw his jacket on the desk, pulling off his boots, throwing them on the floor. "It's been..."

Thace knew what he meant. His limbs felt weak and his eyes leaden, like he could sleep for days. "It has indeed been eventful."

"To say the least." Keith yawned and stretched before he bent down to scratch the wolf behind the ear. "It's like everything has come to an end. This really is the end of the war, isn't it?" He stood, slumping. "I understand why... why he did it. At the church—" Keith pressed his lips together, tense. "He doesn't even like Sendak." Keith eyes met Thace's. "They both did what they could. Sendak too."

It was generous of Keith, Thace thought. Nothing could make him hate Shiro, but he did not have to be generous. "The price for peace. With Sendak as his mate, we have the main part of the traditionalist Galra behind us, and those who are too radical to support Sendak because he mated with a human—they will be easier to find. They will rise in anger, and we will find them."

Keith made a bitter laughter. It sounded sharp and hard in the small room. The wolf made a growl and raised its hackles, like it wanted to make sure Keith was fine. "There is romance for you. Shiro marries his enemy and we discuss the strategies of war and peace with a wolf on our hands."

"I assume you are not interested in being wooed tonight. We have a baby on our hands," Thace said with a soft smile. It had all happened so fast that the addition to their sudden family elicited no more than a shrug, not for the lack of care for the small wolf, but because it was nothing compared to the rest of the day. It was a sweet puppy and Thace liked animals. The wolf, as young as it was, was protective of Keith. They had similar interests. It would be fine. At least the wolf was fine.

"We did not get any tableware. Good thing, since we have nowhere to put it."

"We have nowhere to put a wolf, either."

Keith made a sound that sounded like the growl the puppy had made. "You said I could keep him! I want—"

Thace held up a hand, hoping to nip their first and unnecessary argument in the bud. "It is not my decision. If you wish to keep wolves, that is what you do. I am not your keeper; I trust that you are able to make the decisions you need to make for yourself. I merely pointed out that this tiny room is not suitable for a puppy, and definitely not for a grown wolf. Or a fully grown Galra, for that matter. I must admit that it is a little cramped."

"What's wrong with it?" Keith sat down on the bed and pulled the squirming wolf into his lap. "It's perfectly fine." He spluttered as the puppy tried to shove its tongue into his nose.

Thace raised an eyebrow. The room was little better than one of the boxes humans kept their footwear in. "For a small, single Galra soldier, yes. For a man with a Galra mate and a Space Wolf that needs room to grow it is not adequate."

"I suppose—" Keith said slowly. "But I have nowhere else to go. A shack that belonged to my father. In the desert. Maybe if we ask the Garrison..." Pursing his lips, Keith seemed to consider the options. "Nah."

"We should talk about that. I have the means to purchase a house. My room is no better than this. Besides, I do not wish to live with my mate under the scrutiny of a princess and a few handfuls of master spies."

"Are you telling me that they'll spy on us?" Keith laughed, amused. The sound was welcome and clear as a spring. "Yeah, Antok would. How I ever thought he was the strong, silent type is just… baffling."

"Strong. Silent, no. Not unless it's a question of secrecy or death." Thace smiled at the thought of his friend. "Peace becomes him as it becomes you."

"No threats of sudden death," Keith said. "It certainly becomes us all. You too." Keith looked up, his eyes making a slow ascent, taking in Thace's appearance in quite the appreciative way. The sadness that had marred Keith's face since Shiro's refusal fluttered away, wounded by the soft, wicked smile on his lips. "Maybe I take after my old man. I mean, you are Galra, and he—"

Thace shook his head. "And your father was a brat, too?"

It made Keith snort. "I am not a brat. You should not speak of your mate like that. On the contrary," he said. "You should be happy that my dad liked the Galra so much. So get down here and make sure your mate is comfortable," Keith demanded with a pout. 

"My mate?" Thace certainly didn't mind being reminded, but he hadn't thought that Keith would want to evoke his right and what came with it. 

Keith's face changed, the smile still there, but his eyes were serious. "Your _mate_. I like that. I am so used to being in this constant state of not having what I want the most." He made a sigh and started pulling off more of his clothes, back turned as he tried to climb into the bed, holding on to the wolf and pulling his pants off at the same time. "I told you I like you." Keith's voice was soft and almost inaudible. "I am sad, hurt. But I'm happy too, that I got to pick you. Shiro's gone for good, with Sendak." Keith sat on his knees for a moment before he turned around. "I'm your mate now. Your husband, and you're mine. I want to look forward, Thace. Because I chose you. It is a comfort. I have what I want." 

There were no tears this time, just determination. 

Thace sank down on the bed. He sat for a moment, lost in thoughts. His life had been uprooted, upturned, changed irrevocably. It hadn't been Zarkon or Haggar who had made it so, but the smallest of the Blades, one small enough to have slid right into Thace's heart, leaving wounds there that might leave him to bleed out. 

It had never been care or brotherly feelings that drove Thace towards Keith. Thace had been like a moth to a flame, this fiery, wild little Galra making him burn with love and longing almost from the moment they met. Love came later, but it had not been straggling; Thace couldn't remember exactly when he fell, just that he had fallen, and fast. 

He feared that he would never be able to stand again, not without Keith at his side. Now he would not have to. Slowly he started undressing. Keith's words had made a deep impact. Keith stayed silent. Thace cherished the quiet between them, a precious moment. He folded his uniform and put it on the desk, the table so close he did not have to stand.

Behind him, Keith curled up around the puppy, making a content sigh. "Mmm, I needed this. I'm so tired." He lay quiet for a little before he reached for the blanket and pulled it over himself and the tiny wolf. "You coming? I just wanna sleep, and I—" Keith reached for Thace, his fingers small and thin around Thace's wrist, but strong. "I want you here with me." He yawned, and so did the pup. 

Thace reached out, brushing a lock of dark hair from Keith's face, the tiny puppy following his movements with tired eyes. He got under the covers, pleased when Keith made a soft grunt, a few deep exhales before his breathing evened out. 

"I will guard you with my life," Thace whispered. "Sleep, little wolf."

He was not certain who, exactly, he was speaking to.


	14. Chapter 14

There was barely room for a breath between their lips, but Sendak was not inclined to let go of his human husband. Shiro's buttocks were firm and fit perfectly into his palm; he squeezed them and smirked as Shiro made a delightful groan. Humans were so... responsive. In battle, but certainly when it came to the initial steps of mating, too. Sendak made a low growl, pleased and predatory at once.

Shiro hissed and his eyes widened. "Maybe we should— inside?"

Shiro had a point. "I am not standing outside my house because I have a need to mate with you in public," Sendak let out, slightly breathless. "There are further steps to take before the mating begins." He pressed his mouth to Shiro's again, conquering it with tongue and teeth until Shiro squirmed and sighed into the kiss. Again Sendak made a pleased sound. He did not _like_ humans; he did not like _this_ human, yet touching Shiro was making him hungry for it. He had expected this kind of bodily contact to feel as if he was tainted, irrevocably tainted, but Shiro was tolerable. Seeing that they would mate only once, rolling in the dirt with Shiro was tolerable. The small sounds and the eager cooperation made Sendak eager too. It was almost as if he had chosen a love-mate, a luxury that few Galra were allowed, or even interested in. The idea of Shiro being a choice of love was ridiculous, of course. Sendak would never fall victim to the idiocy of falling in love. Shiro was a mate of convenience, a way to secure peace—no more, no less.

None of his reservations prevented him from kissing Shiro again. Hard, and with unrelenting desire.

"I— no, but what—" Shiro looked dazed and sounded broken. His small but strong fingers were buried in Sendak's fur, making a mess of it. 

The pull of Shiro's sinewy fingers was proof of his strength and thus not unappealing. It pleased Sendak that he had been able to make the Black Paladin lose his calm, so he forgave Shiro for ruining his impeccably groomed fur. "Galra tradition must be observed," Sendak murmured, halfway into another kiss without really noticing it. He pulled back and let Shiro slide down to stand on his own. 

Shiro's advances had no effect on him, Sendak decided. He merely wished to let his human mate collect himself for a tick or three before they continued. While Shiro was a strong human, he was easily swayed by carnal lust. It was a flaw in his husband, Sendak realized, but not a fatal one.

With reddened skin and wet lips, Shiro looked up at him. "What must I do?"

It took Sendak a few ticks to remember what he had meant to do. The way Shiro looked up at him, sharp white teeth against pink, spit-slick lips, almost had Sendak reaching for him once more. He refrained, refusing to let his mate have such power over him. Sendak breathed in deeply, straightening up. He hissed as the fabric of his pants rubbed against the head of his penis. No, he would not allow the pleasure of the body to rule his actions. He was of a better mettle than humans.

"You must wait here, outside, so I can welcome you into my house. _Our_ house, but until the mating is complete, _my_ house. The mating begines when you accept my courting and the offer of sharing all my property with you by stepping inside."

"I can do that." Shiro nodded once, matter of factly, remarkably fast to recover from his state of arousal. "Is that all?"

"After the welcoming of the mate into the house, mates will make ready for the night that they will spend together. We must lie together in bed until dawn."

"Fine. Maybe we should… continue, then?" Shiro closed his eyes, opening them again, standing straight, like he was still fighting his primitive human urges.

Sendak had to admit that he much preferred it when he had the upper hand and Shiro looked like he was about to faint, flushed and dazed from the kisses that he had bestowed on him. Sendak maintained an indifferent expression. "Indeed. Please await my invitation to enter."

Stepping inside, he closed the door behind him, leaving Shiro standing on the marble steps. Leaning against the front door, Sendak closed his eye for a few ticks, his body betraying his willful mind. He _had_ to stay in control. He would not allow this alien, this... human, to push him over the edge. 

The strong urge to mate with Shiro clashed with everything Sendak was. How was it possible that such a primitive being could stir up this kind of violent emotions in him? He was the leader of the Galra fleet, a soldier of countess battles. He could win this battle too, easily. He only needed to remind himself that innumerable generations of pure Galra blood would be tainted by this mating and he would surely regain full command of his body and faculties. 

Slowly he turned, preparing himself. He had married the human already; it would be a violation of his code of honor to refuse him entrance to his home, a gross violation of the courtesy any Galra of honor owed their bond-mate.

Sendak stood proud as he opened the door to invite Shiro in. He bowed deeply. "Commander Shirogane Takashi of the Earth Fleet, do me the honor and enter into my house." Sendak stepped aside, allowing Shiro to enter. 

Shiro stood there, silent, expressionless, although his eyes were wide and alert, almost afraid. His breathed in loudly, revealing to Sendak emotions that should have stayed hidden. A handful of ticks passed them by before Shiro stepped over the threshold. 

Closing the door, Sendak turned to Shiro again. He paused, then went down on one knee in front of him, a practiced movement, refined from the many times he had kneeled for the Galra emperor. This was different. His genuflection was not a sign of submission, but one of respect— it merely denoted the respect one mate owed another. For once, it was Sendak looking up at Shiro, the small human staring down at him, still wide-eyed with apprehension. 

Sendak took a moment, making sure he remembered the words correctly before he put his fist over his heart. The sacred mating vow heralded the birth of a deep, unbreakable bond, and uttering those words was something Sendak had never imagined doing. Yet he was here, his mate before him, and in this instant it mattered little that Shiro was not the mate a Galra general of the purest blood would have chosen. Shirogane Takashi was his mate and husband and Sendak owed him his allegiance.

I welcome you, Takashi," Sendak said solemnly as he pressed his hand to his heart, his voice firm. "I welcome you as my mate, sharing with you what I own: my honor, my sword, my mind, my body, my property. I welcome you to this house which is no longer mine, but ours. I welcome you in my heart, forever yours. I welcome you as my master and as my servant, bound to you for eternity. I will be yours as you will be mine. My duty will be to you, from this day forward. Take my hand, and with it my everything."

He held out his hand and Shiro's hand fell into his, a small shivering animal caught between Sendak's fingers. With no affection for the man he was about to mate, Sendak looked up, Shiro's eyes dark, glazed over, seeing nothing, like he was caught in a world of his own. 

With a softness he did not know he possessed, Sendak stood, cupping Shiro's cheek in his prosthetic hand. "I told you I will not make this any harder for you than it already is. But help yourself and stop wishing for what was, and focus instead on what is. Tonight you will become my mate, and I will do everything in my power to protect you and care for you. Neither you, nor I have what we want most for ourselves, but we will have peace. Peace throughout the universe, and in our home." Sendak made a small sigh. "I am your servant, as you are mine. My duty is to you, Shirogane Takashi, even if I do not long for you, nor have any affection for you. On my honor."

Tension left Shiro's body, shoulders slumping. "I— thank you. I won't make it difficult for you, either." Shiro's look was earnest. "I swear I'll try to be a good mate to you. At least I can do that. If what you say is true, then—"

The mere idea that he would lie to anyone was an affront to his honor. Sendak bit back the annoyed growl. "I always speak the truth. In war _and_ in peace."

"You do tend to let your mouth run in battle," Shiro agreed. "But the truth, always?"

"Yes." Sendak huffed, annoyed. "I honor my foe by letting him know that I will kill him. Stabbing a foe in the back is dishonorable and weak. The act of a coward."

"And your mate?" Shiro's eyes narrowed. 

_Calculating the risk_ , Sendak was certain, albeit there was none. "I honor my mate by being truthful with him as well. Not that I intend to kill him; I have other designs on his body. My duty to him is to bring him pleasure this night. Truth and pleasure."

Shiro opened his mouth, then shut it again. 

Sendak recalled the dazed look in Shiro's eyes as he resurfaced from being kissed senseless. "There are more ways than one to overcome a foe," Sendak purred. "If you will allow me the delight of showing you some of the more… entertaining ones?" Again Sendak touched Shiro's furless face, studying the way his lips parted, the way his nostrils flared, how the pale skin flushed pink, a sign, Sendak had learned, that denoted either embarrassment or arousal. Or both. "If you are still not against copulating?"

"My— my duty is to you," Shiro offered, voice hoarse. "And I won't lie to you about—wanting that. Sex. I won't lie about anything. I guess we're in this together."

*

They made it up the stairs without incident, unless one counted a Galra hand down one's pants as one such. It took Sendak less than ten seconds to have Shiro back to that dark place where lust and disgust met, making him forget anything but the craving that wrecked his body, betraying it. Shiro was so starved for touch, for being wanted, that his libido happily removed any obstacles that his brain would have been more than happy to provide. Any internal bursts of outrage against sleeping with the enemy were hushed by the burning desire to see his own cravings mirrored in Sendak's hunger, his ferocious, dangerous hunger.

Shiro gasped for air as Sendak pulled back for a moment, shoving open the door to the bedroom. It hit the wall with a loud bang. Shiro let out a displeased whine as Sendak let him go, the silk tunic sliding in place, covering his open pants and his hard cock. Shiro's neck was wet from kisses and the delightful little bites that Sendak had littered there, his skin burning from the touch of a rough hand, from claws trailing across his chest, down to his leaking dick. 

"You are appealing when you are not trying to dispose of me," Sendak purred and grabbed Shiro's wrist, pulling him towards the gigantic bed that stood in the middle of the room, turned so that there was a view. The panorama—the darkening sky across a desert tingling with stars—was breathtaking, almost as breathtaking as Sendak's touch. Shiro fell easily into Sendak's arms, on tiptoe to reach for his kisses once again. Sendak's tongue filled his mouth, thick and invasive, and Shiro moaned into the kiss, his hand splayed on Sendak's chest, the silk crumbling under his fingers. 

"Will you come willingly to my bed—our bed?" Sendak purred as he broke the kiss. His words were hoarse, torn, like the kiss had made an impact. "To mate with me?"

Shiro would. He hated his husband, hated the disaster he had brought on himself, but he wanted sex—just one last time before he had to go without for the rest of his miserable life. His miserable, _peaceful_ life. 

"Yes." The reply was cold and hard and had sharp edges. 

"Good." Sendak made a rough growl that might have been a purr. "We must undress. The mating tunics must be preserved in honor of this night."

 _Honor_. Shiro huffed. He could have had love. If he'd been less honorable, less inclined to save the universe. "All right." He braced himself. Even dressed, he felt vulnerable and naked, like Sendak's prosthetic eye enabled him to see through the thin silk. There was no way around it. He would have to endure Sendak's curious gaze. It was one night—and never again. He could do it. He wanted to have his brain fucked out so bad, an ironic reward for his sacrifice. He reached down to grab the hem of the tunic, pulling it over his head.

Shiro refused to hide his scars. He wanted Sendak to see them. _This_ is what your Galra accomplishes did to me he wanted to say, but he had no choice but to let the scars speak for him. Every cut, every burn spoke of pain and fear, of battles he had never wanted to fight. He stopped, tunic in hand, frozen, back in the arena, if only for a second. "I am not sure I can do this, even though I—" His arousal was gone, chased away by the aftermath of war and suffering etched into their skin, carved into their bodies.

Sendak said nothing, just reached for the hem of his own tunic, pulling it off, leaving himself to Shiro's scrutiny. 

The scars started at the neck.

"Quiznak," Shiro breathed. "How—"

"I was at the front." Like it explained everything. "A Galra general does not let his men fight his battles for him."

Shiro stared in horror as Sendak released the prosthetic arm. It let go with a hiss. Sendak threw it on the chair with a disgruntled huff.

"I am not a weapon," Sendak said in a low voice, almost inaudible. "I will not be a weapon in my own house. Neither should you be. Those… " He closed his eye for a moment. "My home is the one place in the universe where I am not required to be anything but myself. You are my mate. I am not a threat to you, nor are you a threat to me. You swore to me as I swore to you. My allegiance is to you and you alone, Takashi, and secondly to the Galra nation. Keep your arm on, release it if you wish; but know that you will have no need of it in my care. On my word and on my honor." Sendak hung his head like a defeated soldier before he looked up, allowing Shiro, at least Shiro believed that it was by purpose, to see him vulnerable and open. "Let our house be a house of honor and safety. A home, a true home. For both of us."

The words sounded sincere. Shiro pursed his lips, studying the Galra prosthetic that Sendak had shedded with little care. Sendak's openness had taken him by surprise; he had never thought that Sendak would bare himself like that, but apparently the entire mating business was more important to him than Shiro had imagined. Refusing to show a similar level of vulnerability… it would be like telling Sendak that he didn't trust him. In a way Shiro did, despite everything. Sendak was blatantly racist, he was violent, manipulative, and cruel. Shiro could find little reason to like the man he had married, yet he could not refuse the offer of peace. He had to give Sendak a chance. 

Shiro fumbled with his own arm, a warm hand of flesh and blood against the cold metal of the prosthetic arm. He had hated the Galra arm they had forced on him. In a way his own body had betrayed him, his arm carrying the disease that had set wars in motion, a chain of events so long and complicated that Shiro felt tied up, caught in the tangled mess. The new one wasn't any better. He still carried with him proof of his defeat, a chain of another make, but a chain nevertheless.

But what if he let go of it? What if he let the chain slip through his fingers, finding something else to hold on to?

It was a choice. His choice. For once, he had one. He could decide to trust Sendak like he had done most of this day—without having his trust violated. Or he could refuse the offer of peace, for Shiro recognized it as such. His choice. Would they live as enemies in this house, or could they live here in peace? Was he able to make peace with the man who would never be his lover but maybe—in time—his… friend?

If there was no peace, it would all have been for nothing. 

So trust it was. 

Shiro reached up, flipping the release to the prosthesis. The arm powered down with a low buzzing, hanging limply from the base. Shiro wanted that off too now that he had made his decision. If being naked and vulnerable meant something to Sendak, Shiro would strip down to the bare bones if needed. 

Sendak did not flinch as Shiro released the shoulder socket, revealing the slightly inflamed pink flesh under it. 

Instead he smiled. It was not a cruel or hungry smile, but a milder one, friendly. "Thank you."

Shiro dropped the prosthesis on the floor. Rubbing his sore shoulder, he hesitated not sure how to go on.

Sendak huffed and discarded his boots, his feet naked and with sharp claws, like Sendak made sure they could be used in combat too. 

"I thought your body wasn't a weapon," Shiro said, eyebrow raised. "Impressive. Did you know there are birds on Earth who have similar feet, using them to fight rivals?"

Sendak scoffed. "I am not a bird. Besides, you and I both know what can be done with the bare hands in a fight. Hand." Sendak shrugged. It looked strange; his massive chest and shoulder moving, the left side nothing but empty air where a similarly massive shoulder should have been. 

_This is how I look,_ Shiro reminded himself. The thought brought him a sudden rush of relief. He was with someone who didn't care. Shiro didn't like it when people were too understanding or overly curious about it. Sendak's no-nonsense approach helped. Shiro hadn't been with anyone since Adam and he had avoided being naked in front of a lover because the mere idea added to the feeling of vulnerability. There hadn't been a lover, but Shiro was sure he would have felt uncomfortable.

"I remember far too well what can be done." Shiro raised his natural hand as if to ward off the reminder of their purpose during war. They had been soldiers. Killers. "Maybe we could forget about war for tonight?"

Sendak made a smug smile and dropped his pants. "My hand is not the only part of me that is impressive. If you will allow me, husband, I will make you forget everything but our union. Come to bed with me, if you so desire, and I will make you my mate." 

"You are very confident," Shiro said drily with a look to the—admittedly impressive—Galra part that he had no experience with. He would have soon enough. There was no reason to postpone the inevitable, not that Shiro had any intentions to do so. He already had a taste of how hot Sendak ran. He wanted more, a memory to last. Refusing to cave in and cover up, Shiro finished what he started, pulling off boots and pants, underwear with them. He was hardening again by the mere sight of Sendak's toned body, like lust had lingered, refusing to fade. Sendak was too, which felt like a small triumph. Sendak might not like him, but he certainly didn't mind what was happening. Or his dick didn't mind. Hard was hard, Shiro was certain, even if Sendak was an alien.

"Good muscle tone," Sendak said with a tinge of admiration to his voice. "You are a strong and healthy mate. It will not be a chore to copulate with you."

Shiro shook his head. Sendak was incredible. 

When Sendak reached for him he went willingly, the embrace no less strong with only one arm to hold him. Shiro put his arm around Sendak's waist, fingers buried in his fur, a ridge of longer tufts running along his spine. _Soft._ Shiro made a content sigh. 

Sendak bent his head, pressing his lips to Shiro's temple. "I offered you everything I have, everything I am. I am offering you pleasure too—if you will take it."

"And if I'd rather give it?" Shiro looked up at Sendak's face, eyes narrowed, jaw tense. "Then what?"

Sendak chuffed, his chest vibrating with laughter. "Then you are more than welcome. You make it sound like it is not common beetween human mates to both give and receive pleasure. Do you think that because you are smaller and weaker that I would resist you, entering my body? Mating is not a battlefield, Takashi, and taking from you is not a defeat. Pleasure shared between willing mates never is." 

Unable to hide his surprise, Shiro stared at Sendak, mouth half open, eyes wide. "Oh, I thought perhaps— it is common, but you—I—"

"You seem to have many preconceived notions about me, Commander Shirogane." Sendak's hand slid down, the huge hand cupping Shiro's ass. "With your consent, let me put some of your worries to rest." 

Shiro made an undignified squeal as Sendak pulled him closer, lips on his neck, immediately nibbling at it as Shiro tilted his head to the side, exposing his most sensitive spot to Sendak's teasing bites. He kept silent apart from a weak moan as Sendak soon moved upwards to engage in another deep kiss.

Shiro hesitated, again torn between lust and disgust before he shed his reluctance like an old, tired coat, his body tingling with reborn arousal. Sendak had done little more than to kiss him and already had him surrendering. Shiro had no doubt that what they had started during the ceremony would soon come to a sweaty and messy end. If this was going to be Shiro's last time, at least it would be memorable. 

"So you really meant it when you said that mates are both master and servant to one another," Shiro said softly, stating the fact more than actually asking a question. He melted against Sendak, naked chest against naked chest, soaking up his warmth, the touch of another being for the mere sake of pleasure so distant and unfamiliar. Sendak's fur was like the velvet of a horse's nose. Shiro turned his face into it, allowing Sendak to continue kissing his neck. 

"You are my mate, your word is my command," Sendak murmured between little kisses and bites. "Tonight I will serve you, as is my duty."

"I'd feel better if it was less about duty and more about desire," Shiro growled, none too serious about it. He didn't _want_ Sendak, just like Sendak didn't want him and they both knew it. But for the night, the illusion of being wanted, needed, would help. 

Shiro guessed that Sendak didn't dabble in illusion. Or emotion. 

"We are both soldiers," Sendak countered. "We do not have needs other than those of our emperor and coalition."

"You just told me I am your mate and your aim is to please me." Shiro took half a step back, staring at Sendak, giving him a defiant glare. "So get to it. And if you tell me again that it is all duty and that _this_ —" He grabbed Sendak's alien appendage, too bold, but he was above caring. "—that this is not because you _want_ to have sex with me, then you can go fuck yourself with the fist you have left."

Shiro had counted on anger or on Sendak's outraged refusal. He got neither. Instead he was on his back on the bed before he could react, Sendak straddling him, the huge purple cock bobbing over his stomach, hard and dripping. 

"So feisty, little human." Sendak leaned down, his face right above Shiro's, fangs glistening dangerously. "Maybe you like being the servant more than being the master? It would please me greatly if that is so. Because you are right. I _will_ enjoy taking you. I will cherish your cries of pleasure. I will enjoy it when you beg me for permission to come, and I'll refuse you. Make you beg some more." Sendak's lips slid over Shiro's cheek to his ear. "I will make you remember this night for a long time."

Lust flared again, a violent, devouring fire, and Shiro wanted it, wanted to burn. "Please," he begged weakly, not sure what he was asking for other than everything Sendak offered him. He wanted to be here, now, no thoughts, no fear, just pleasure. He wanted to be taken and he wanted Sendak to fuck him until he felt nothing but the slide of a cock inside him, Sendak's huge hand on his skin. 

"Make me your mate," Shiro demanded hoarsely. "Or maybe you have it all in the mouth?"

Sendak's reply was a deep purr before his mouth was on Shiro's again, the scorching kisses resumed, wet and hungry. Sendak was not slaking any fires, but setting them. Arm around Sendak's neck, Shiro gave as good as he got, jolts of satisfaction shooting through him as Sendak moaned, his breath damp on Shiro's lips. Shiro wanted more, raising his head to take another kiss, but Sendak pulled back, a dazed look in his eye.

"Ceasefire," Sendak managed. "If you want to be mated before I take you. I do not wish to perform a sacred rite under the onslaught of your clever attacks. You are most accomplished in this kind of warfare."

Reluctant to do anything but kissing Sendak, Shiro forced himself to answer. "You are my husband. You accepted _my_ rite. I'll respect yours." He didn't let go but continued exploring the scars on Sendak's back, little ridges under his fingers. Scars like his own. 

"It is common to perform the rite before the mating." Sendak breathed in, nuzzling Shiro's hair more tenderly than Shiro had ever thought possible. "We draw blood, exchanging it, becoming one through it."

"Another scar for the both of us?"

"Yes. But one of pleasure, not of valor or duty. If you do not oppose, I would prefer to do it that way. It is tradition. Between mates is blood, life. A blood oath that must be honored for eternity."

Again, Sendak spoke of honor. Shiro found it odd to be the target of this honorable behavior; he had seen during the war how it drove Sendak above and beyond, made him willing to die, to sacrifice everything for those he was bound to by said honor. Sendak's life was informed by it. Shiro had to accept that side of him. Sendak would no longer be Sendak without it. Strangely, that thought did not sit well with Shiro. "What do you need me to do?"

"Pleasure eases pain. Allow me to please you until such moment arises when you will enjoy the mating bite. There is a small rite to perform. A vow."

Shiro nodded his acceptance.

Sendak straightened up, his eye trained on Shiro's naked chest. "As much as I would like to go on, let us arrange the pillows so we can rest more comfortably for the mating bite."

Without waiting for Shiro's participation, Sendak rolled off Shiro, getting on his knees as he moved the pillows, piling them up against the headboard and to the sides. For once, Shiro didn't care about the fussing. Sendak knew how it felt to lie down, missing limb making it difficult to do so, but necessary for the use of the one arm. He knew what he was doing, because he arranged the pillows the exact same way that Shiro would have done it. 

"It is a relief I don't have to explain," Shiro said quietly. He pushed himself up to sit, a lock of hair falling into his eyes. He blew at it, too caught up in watching Sendak's muscles flex as he turned around to sit against the headboard. There was much to be said about Sendak, a great deal of it not very polite, but ugly he wasn't. At least not on the outside. 

Sendak held out his hand. "Come lie with me, husband. Let us forget the past for now so that we can enjoy our one night together."  
Shiro wanted nothing more than to enjoy. To get it over with. To forget. To remember. It was complicated, his urge a multicolored pattern of contrasting emotions. Pleasure was simple and tonight he would choose pleasure. Sendak was big and strong, as confident in his abilities in bed as he was in his abilities in combat. It came down to that: the easiest, simplest solution to it all was to let Sendak do what he wanted. Shiro would be able to forget for a few hours, the battlefield moved from space to the confines of Sendak's huge bed. 

Their bed. 

Shiro put his hand on Sendak's shoulder, carefully arranging himself, halfway draped over Sendak's wide chest. There was something alluring about feeling the soft fur on his face, the hard muscle underneath flexing against his cheek. It was so good finally touching another being again. Shiro would have liked to add 'human' to that notion, but that was one thing Sendak was not. 

"Most pleasing," Sendak said with a purr. The sudden weight of his hand on his back made Shiro jolt, the unfamiliar feeling almost a shock. He let the tension out with a breath as Sendak caressed him, his thumb rubbing gentle circles on his skin until Shiro relaxed again. The pressure on his back increased as Sendak pulled him closer, nuzzling at his cheek to—at least that was what Shiro thought—to make him look up.

Not at all unwilling to obey Sendak's veiled command, Shiro did.

Then Sendak's mouth was on him. The universe turned small and narrow, made up of heated kisses and lingering touches, the pleasure destroying any remaining doubts in Shiro. He let himself fall into the depths of intense joy of finally being touched. His lust was flaring brightly as he gave back with all he had. Sendak's little purrs, raw and unrestricted, were spurring him on. Free to explore, Shiro stroked Sendak's arm, moved his hand across the broad shoulder, to Sendak's neck, up to where the long, silken tufts of hair brushed over his fingers. Shiro played with them, Sendak's purring getting louder. Hesitating only briefly, Shiro brushed a finger along Sendak's ear, stroking it. Sendak slid his huge thigh between Shiro's legs, and Shiro spread them willingly, the heaviness of Sendak's limb feeling so good as Shiro thrust against it, his neglected cock still hard for the accidental slide of warm skin. 

"Mhm," Sendak let out, the moan tearing up the purr. "That is—" He turned his head so that Shiro's hand covered his ear, rubbing himself against it. 

"Yes?" Shiro said slowly, wondering what it was about.

"Only between mates." Sendak made another low moan.

So the touch was intimate, almost like a secret. Shiro liked that he found that out, knowing something so private about Sendak. "And you do not mind that I know?" he asked, again stroking Sendak's ear. "It is a weakness, isn't it? Even if it is only your mate who knows about it?"

"Mmm." Sendak flicked his ear, again rubbing it against Shiro's fingers, very much like a huge cat looking for a cuddle. Shiro didn't think a cuddle was in the cards, though. It was still amusing that the Galra general who insisted he had no weaknesses was like putty in Shiro's hand, angling for an ear rub. 

"Sure," Shiro commented coolly. "My husband's secret is that he is a big cat."

"Mates are devoted to one another," Sendak murmured. "I have allowed you this because I do trust you, Takashi. Mating is forever, and I trust you. The pleasure you give me can never be a weakness. It gives me strength."

That was the nicest thing Sendak had said to him since he had appeared before the Council to ask for his hand. The most sincere. Shiro wasn't in doubt that Sendak meant it, honor and all. "And I trust you," Shiro said without really thinking but it was true nevertheless. "I trust you to take care of me."

Sendak's laughter sounded like a distant rumble of thunder. "I will. I told you that I will—repeatedly. You have stopped doubting me?"

"Yeah." Shiro shifted so that he could look Sendak in the eye. "I never thought I'd say this, but we are both making an effort." He smiled, a true smile for the first time in days, one that made the corners of his eyes crinkle and his cheeks heat up. "I beat you every time on the battlefield, there is no way I'll let you win the Best Mating Effort Award."

"You did not," Sendak said, like he was scandalized for good. "There is an awa—" Sendak closed his mouth, then opening it again as he laughed once more, louder. "There is no such thing as a Best Mate Award."

"No," Shiro said, trying not to laugh too. He pressed his lips together as not to do it. "But if there was, I'd win it."

" _I_ , Commander Sendak, will win this imaginary award. _The chosen mate of Sendak is without flaws_ , I will tell my peers, but between us, we both know better. _I_ am the superior mate." Sendak's eye glinted with gold and sunlight.

"You're not my mate at all," Shiro teased, intrigued by Sendak's hitherto hidden ability to be... cute. Still aggressive and arrogant, but strangely cute. Shiro scooted closer, just to feel Sendak's hard body against his own. Maybe he was giving Sendak an advantage for their imaginary award, but Shiro _needed_. "Not yet. So you cannot win anything."

Sendak made a smile that flashed his canines. "That can be remedied, _husband_."

"Oh, really?" Shiro shot back, pulling lightly at Sendak's ear. "And who's— Oh!"

He cut himself off, out of oxygen, rendered breathless by the sudden, hard grip around his cock. Sendak's hand covered it entirely, the brush of fur making it feel like it was encased in silk and steel. The sharp edge of a claw slid over the head and Shiro whined, the sting only stoking the fire that flared inside him once more. A wince caught in his throat. He burned with need and shame, mostly ashamed of how fast Sendak brought him back to being a needy, eager creature, tied up in his own longing.

"Any objections?" Sendak smirked and twisted his hand, making it impossible to do anything but to thrust into his fist. 

Sendak certainly hadn't saved himself, Shiro was certain; he excelled in bed as he did in battle. "More," Shiro demanded, the only word that had any significant meaning to him that instant. It had been years, so Sendak had to make up for that, and for the years to come where Shiro's bed would be empty. "Make it matter."

"I chose you as my mate; it will always matter," Sendak huffed. " _You_ will always matter."

That promise more than anything else Sendak had done made Shiro melt. His heart felt warm and his skin hot, the sharp touch of Sendak's claw still burning. He slid his thigh up against Sendak's huge leg, his strange cock fully out into the open, spreading deep purple folds to reveal its slick, ribbed surface. Shiro was sure he couldn't take it all, but he'd damned well try. Stars, would he try!

He reached down, tryingly brushing a finger over it. Sendak made a abrupt purring noise, then went back to the soft purring he'd made before. Leaning closer, Sendak resumed kissing and licking Shiro's neck, seemingly pleased with the way they were going. 

Giving in to need once more, Shiro relished that he was finally allowed to touch Sendak. His cock was warm, slick, naked, but it felt so good in Shiro's hand. Every time he rubbed the ridges, Sendak made one of those abrupt purrs, dark and open-mouthed, the sound humming, vibrating on Shiro's skin.

"My mate," Sendak purred. "Let me take you as my mate."

Shiro paused, not knowing what to expect, but too far gone to care, Sendak's kisses on his skin almost intoxicating.

Pausing, his lips hovering close to Shiro's neck, Sendak began speaking. "With this bite I accept your flesh. With this blood I bind myself to you. With this oath I am yours, now and until the stars cease to be." Sendak's words were sure and firm, just like the bite when it came, sudden and sharp. 

The pain flooded his entire being, overwhelming him. It had a cruel beauty to it, a pure fire that shone so bright, just like the beauty of the words Sendak had spoken. The pain was not unbearable, but it went deep, all-encompassing, eternal. Somehow he knew that the ache it left would would always be with him, not because of the wound, but because he would never be a true mate. He would never be anything but Sendak's mate by name. Shiro kept quiet, taking deep breaths as the power of the oath wrecked him, its finality too huge, to colossal.

It was done. He was Sendak's, now and until the stars ended. 

Sendak's voice was hoarse, broken, when he finally spoke. Shiro looked up, bleary-eyed and dizzy, only to see Sendak watching him closely. "I wish for my bite to be visible. I want—" Sendak stopped, raising his head, putting a claw to his neck, indicating the spot. "I will not let anyone think I am ashamed to mate with you."

Looking up, Shiro had not thought he would see the want so clearly in the way Sendak looked at him. 

"Okay." It was not very eloquent, but pain and pleasure, combined with the odd pulling and pushing of emotions within him, Shiro's mind was blank. All he could think of was _mate_. It felt right, to bite, to claim. He used one leg to push himself up higher, nose against Sendak's neck, licking it, breathing in the scent of his mate. Shiro murmured the word into Sendak's fur, muffled and weak, but compelling. _Mate_. 

"I will be," Sendak promised. "Let me." There was a snap of a lid, squelching sounds, another surprise, like Sendak had made sure he knew what was required to ensure Shiro's comfort. Determined to act and not think too much, Shiro willingly spread his legs when Sendak pushed at one thigh. He moaned at the pressure at his opening, Sendak gentler than he had thought he would be. Moaning into Sendak's shoulder, Shiro let his urgency guide him and he went back to kissing and nuzzling at the spot where his mating bite would be, sighing from pleasure as Sendak opened him.

The thought of Keith passed him by, a fleeting and deeply painful thought, soon pushed aside by sensations that Shiro never thought he would feel in the hand of his enemy. He should be afraid, prepared to hurl himself into the abyss of fear that Sendak once had instilled in him. Only the abyss didn't open its cruel maw. Instead the slick feeling of a thick finger inside him made him moan weakly, his body ablaze under Sendak's experienced ministrations. The breakdown that Shiro had expected never came. He had thought his wedding night would feel like torture and it didn't.

Unless _torture_ was Sendak's fingers bringing him so close to coming in no time that his Galra husband could win an award for that. 

_Fuck_ , Shiro hissed between clenched teeth. "Please," he got out, holding on to what little sanity he had left, squirming under Sendak, wanting his fingers in deep, wanted the mating to continue. 

Sendak stopped immediately. "Are you content, husband?"

"Oh hell, yes." Shiro laughed breathlessly. "Let me… okay, the bite?" He could feel it again, the magnetism, the pull, the need to be close to Sendak. 

"I am yours, your servant and your master," Sendak murmured. "Proceed." He turned, moving between Shiro's legs and he let him, spreading them wide to acommodate Sendak's huge body.

Trying to clear his mind, rummaging in the useless remains of his lust-ridden brain for the words, Shiro braced himself, eyeing the spot where Sendak wanted the sign of their union. "With this bite I— I accept your flesh. With this blood I bind myself to you." He paused, trying to remember the rest. Oh, _stars_. "With this oath I am yours from now until the stars cease to be."

"Until the stars cease," Sendak agreed, tilting his head to the side as he slid on top of Shiro, his cock pressing at Shiro's entrance. "Close the bond, husband." He paused, the one eye strangely soft. "Please."

There was a deep need in that simple plea, the same need that made Shiro want to close the bond. He breathed in, sliding his lips over velvet fur, worrying the skin with his teeth before he bit down hard, needing force to break through it. Sendak made a hoarse growling sound, gasping as he thrust into Shiro's heat, his cock too big to fit. The scent of blood and the taste of sweet iron filled Shiro's nose and mouth. He groaned again as Sendak moved, his cock filling Shiro up. It should feel appalling, but didn't.

"Shiro." Sendak's voice turned velvet, but it had a streak of surprise in it, like Sendak hadn't expected this either. "Takashi."

"Mm," Shiro managed, arm around Sendak's neck. He licked at the wound before a slow thrust made him look up. 

Then his blood-tainted mouth met Sendak's lips. His kiss burned on them, hotter than any fire, Sendak as eager for it as Shiro. Sendak was huge and heavy on top of him, and yet Shiro felt as if he was wrapped in a lush fur coat, warm and safe, even when Sendak rose up on his arm, thrusting in again and again, slowly pushing Shiro towards an orgasm.

It never hurt. Even when Sendak moved faster, fucking into Shiro as deep as he could go, Shiro felt nothing but pleasure. There was pain, but it was a good pain, one that would linger, prolong the memory of their mating, of the last night of shared pleasure that Shiro would ever have. 

"Takashi." Sendak's strained breathing became erratic and rough with purrs, his mouth wet on Shiro's neck. 

Dazed, Shiro sighed as Sendak pulled back a little. He thrust his arm underneath Shiro's back, getting up on his knees, pressing in deep. Sendak slammed in hard. He went faster and deeper, a little awkward and out of balance, but no less forceful for it. With his shoulders pressing into the bed, legs wrapped around Sendak's waist, his ass in Sendak's lap, Shiro let him.

It was like being caught in a storm, a hurricane that wouldn't let up, an onslaught of brute force. Shiro _loved_ it. He could not have endured tenderness or sweet kisses, but this, this he could get behind, being taken, used, fucked. He was here of his own free will, he had made his choice. Not wisely, but this was _his_ choice. And never had something bad felt so good. 

Pistoning into his body, this time to please and not hurt, Sendak truly was as good a lover as he was a warrior, if still ruthless. Shiro let out a pained groan, causing Sendak to falter. 

"Do you need pause, husband?"

"No." Shiro reached up, hand on Sendak's arm. "Please." 

"You are stronger than I thought." Sendak's bared fangs glistened in the low light, like he was thinking of the mating bite, or maybe about making a second one. "A good mate. Resilient." He pulled out a little, looking between down them, mouth wrung in a smirk. "Only I get to see you like this, writhing in pleasure on a Galra cock. I like it."

"Better enjoy it while it lasts," snapped Shiro and yanked Sendak down on top of him, making Sendak laugh and purr at the same time, dark and rough.

"And you are so eager for it, too, little human."

"Don't get too full of yoursel—uh!" Sendak silenced him with a deep thrust, making him see the stars that were hidden from him by the roof over their heads.

"I would rather I filled you." Sendak's gaze was intense. "My mate."

Shiro could not find any fault in that idea. He breathed in deep, relaxing, trying to get more of Sendak's huge dick inside him. He could not take all of it, but he would be damned sure to try. His body was thrumming with desire for Sendak, and Shiro clung to the feeling, refusing to think of anything, dismissing anything but the moment. He would have time for regret and self-blame, but that time was not now. He closed his eyes, frowning, once more pushing the thought of what could have been to the back of his mind.

Sendak slanted his lips over Shiro's, the kiss softer, lingering. "Come back to me, Takashi. You can entertain those emotions when our night is over. Be here, with me."

Shiro's eyes widened for a moment. It was like Sendak had read his mind. Sendak was not wrong. Shiro wanted to be here, wanted to focus on his mate. Shiro reached for Sendak a second time. "I would like that." He smiled, not as predatorily as Sendak, but enough to let Sendak know that he was serious. "I heard the Galra have outstanding stamina. How about you show me?" He raised his chin in a rare challenge. "I have yet to see anything that proves it."

Sendak did not hold back. Galra had stamina to outlast anyone. It did not take long before Shiro was too far gone, a few rough thrusts, before his first orgasm overwhelmed him. That moment his was body wide open for Sendak to take, all of it belonging to him. And Shiro cried out, the bliss of his release leaving him in a state of exhausted satisfaction.

It never let up. Sendak kept him strung out like a bow, arousal and release shifting like waves flowing. Shiro hovered in that place of pleasure for what felt like hours, Sendak coming inside him, on him, marking him over and over. 

Oh, the Galra certainly didn't lack stamina.

*

When dawn arrived, too early, too hot, Shiro was battered and wrecked, for once by pleasure. Their mating bed was ruined, the many times Sendak had come had ruined the mattress. Coated in the dried and sticky substance that Sendak had spilled, Shiro wanted to shower, but he was unsure whether he would violate the bond if he left the bed. To be honest, he wasn't sure he wanted to get up at all.

He knew he had to. Their wedding night was over, and it was time to face reality. The mating had not changed anything in that regard: Shiro still loved Keith with all his heart. He suspected he would do so until the day he no longer had use for it. 

Shiro made a shaky sigh, turning to look at his sleeping husband. He would allow himself this for a little longer. He could pretend that he was mated, married, and happy. It was easy to pretend that he was loved because Sendak had been nothing like Shiro had imagined. Pretending wasn't all that hard when Sendak had been willing to cater to his every wish. 

In the pale sunlight, Sendak didn't look so intimidating. His face, slack with sleep, was handsome, soft. Shiro curled his fingers, burying them in the silken tufts at Sendak's neck. _My mate_. The words were strangely comforting, despite their meaninglessness. Soon he would be free to do what he pleased, free of any demands on his body, any demands on his time. He would see Sendak only when they had to play the happy couple.

Shiro frowned, eyes trailing the lines of Sendak's mouth. He was free, yes. But what if he did not want to be? He could not have the man he loved, but he could have _this_. What if he did not want to be free of Sendak after all?


End file.
